xmow nc perspective

[norudder]

Had first run in with exmm after 4 months nc. We were both married at the start, I've since separated and filed independent of what he was going to do but of course had hopes. He wanted status quo. I decided to end A if he had no intention of D himself so I could heal and seek healthy relationship. But he just would not let go (breaking previous nc attempts, pushing attempted friendship boundaries) until I got good and mad. He said see you in 4 years (youngest will be grown).

 

Fast forward last week and we cross paths. He's happy to see me but I wasn't ready, a little flustered. Just chit chat. He's talking about a family vacation and a domestic chore quibble he and his wife had. I just thought to myself "really"? All the assest, custody, etc negotiations I just went through, your gripe is silly. Get real. Accept it fix it or leave.

 

We are now worlds apart. Feelings don't matter without action. It doesn't matter if he was a liar or a coward or just had different values. Im not over him but I plan to keep moving on till I am. I changed my life and will not stay stuck or feel sorry for him not changing his. His I love yous just look like a joke now. Those words are as good to me as monopoly money. But I know the depths of what I can feel and more importantly what I can give to someone who is truly ready. Its about ME.

 

Thanks for listening. Hopefully other OW will start making it about themselves as well.

[Confused48]

We are now worlds apart. Feelings don't matter without action. His I love yous just look like a joke now. Those words are as good to me as monopoly money.

 

^^^^this. You are so strong. You are in such the right place. I can not envision a way that you will not, very soon, be happy and fulfilled.

[Gloria_Smellons]

I'm not over him but I plan to keep moving on till I am.

 

I really like this. Keep on moving on!

[Popsicle]

Good for you, girl, and yes, keep moving on. Don't even talk to him and feed anymore.