jimmy1968 Posted February 15, 2015 Share Posted February 15, 2015 I've been posting here and thanks for all the support. I have set up good boundaries with my Ex BPD, or whatever craziness she has. She was a nightmare and I kept sleeping with her. I have a couple screws loose myself for doing it. I'm not a victim or her. I'm a victim of my choices. I think we both where trying to hang onto something that wasn't ever real. I feel good, other woman are showing me interest. Two of them are way kinder that my ex. Both are way more attractive. I've went on a date with each and have a date with another woman on Weds. I'm just getting to know these woman. I've been very honest on where I'm at in my life and not building any expectations for them. I'm a kind person and would not want to hurt anyone the way I was hurt by my EX. Just going out having fun. Feels really nice to have some female companionship in my life. I still think about my ex and have obsessive thoughts around her. Wish I could stop thinking about her. It's not as bad as it was but I can't seem to shake her grasp over me. She was a rotten wife, she is really a pretty messed up person in general. Why do I let her into my thoughts when I have great things heading for me in the furture. Why can't I just be grateful she is gone from my home. I prayed every night for her to leave. I really wanted the divorce and don't see us having any future other than our daughter. She was so toxic and abusive. It's hard to share a daughter with her. I think next week will be easier, although this week was pretty good. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ralph79 Posted February 15, 2015 Share Posted February 15, 2015 It's a tough road man. I admire your resolve. It's natural to be tempted. You're like the recovering alcoholic that works at the distillery. You have to interact with your demons constantly and in a way live with them through her resemblance in your daughter. Once you make a habit of pushing your ex aside, the road will get easier. Establishing good habits is the most difficult part of the journey to true happiness. You are not only aware of your problem but you've already started towards fixing it. Don't relent. You are doing great. btw I think you could give very good advice to this person http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/separation-divorce/515225-left-limbo-cheating-drugs-depression-affair-fog Because I see a similar situation and you are 1 step ahead of her. Maybe you could chime in and give some first hand advice that might prove enlightening to you as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jimmy1968 Posted February 15, 2015 Author Share Posted February 15, 2015 Thanks bro! I just gave the advice. Hard to break those ties. This forum allows me to vent and it give me more clarity around the situation. One day at a time. Today's gonna be a good day 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted February 15, 2015 Share Posted February 15, 2015 I still think about my ex and have obsessive thoughts around her. Wish I could stop thinking about her. It's not as bad as it was but I can't seem to shake her grasp over me. She was a rotten wife, she is really a pretty messed up person in general. Why do I let her into my thoughts when I have great things heading for me in the future. Keep your mind busy and your time filled. Get exercise, wake up fresh and go to bed tired. Push yourself to do and try different things. Sitting in the dark with a bottle of tequila listening to sad songs is not where you want to be. You should be working on displacement theory - the more room taken up by friends, activities and self-growth, the less room for the thoughts you describe... Mr. Lucky 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jimmy1968 Posted February 16, 2015 Author Share Posted February 16, 2015 Thanks Trying to stay busy and time will heal my thoughts. I need to sit with them and not act on them. Link to post Share on other sites
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