BluEyeL Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 I live in a small town, which is isolated by at least one hour driving to the nearest city that has good meetup groups. I joined one in that city and I've met someone I had a short 3 months fling with. Later, I decided it's a bit far to attend those. But there were none in my little town. So I thought, why not open a meetup group myself then? I opened two. One for single women over 40. And the other one co-ed "singles over 40". I'm still running the female one, I gave the coed one to a guy, since I am in a relationship now and I don't think my boyfriend would feel great about the other one. I made at least two good friends and a few constant aquintances out of this group. My groups are small, because of the demographics, but big cities have large groups. The singles over 40 group in the city 1h away from me has over 2000 members. They have multiple activities every day. Link to post Share on other sites
LookAtThisPOst Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 I live in a small town, which is isolated by at least one hour driving to the nearest city that has good meetup groups. I joined one in that city and I've met someone I had a short 3 months fling with. Later, I decided it's a bit far to attend those. But there were none in my little town. So I thought, why not open a meetup group myself then? I opened two. One for single women over 40. And the other one co-ed "singles over 40". I'm still running the female one, I gave the coed one to a guy, since I am in a relationship now and I don't think my boyfriend would feel great about the other one. I made at least two good friends and a few constant aquintances out of this group. My groups are small, because of the demographics, but big cities have large groups. The singles over 40 group in the city 1h away from me has over 2000 members. They have multiple activities every day. That's great that the small town ones you formed kind of turned out well, though I probably wouldn't attend them as I live in a small town, where even if they do have meetups, it's geared towards stay-at-home-moms and play dates. The rest of the community is nothing but retirees and their corresponding meetups. There was, ironically (and yes, I'm using this word correctly) of a "young adults 20s and 30s" group in the area where I live that decided to boot me out as they rethought their age requirements and sent me an email saying so. It wasn't their policy at first, but they went over the rules and decided to make it exclusively to that age bracket. They said they didn't like the idea of having to boot people as I was only a couple of years older than their age requirement. But considering they live in a small town anyhow, they'd be flexible if they want to increase their membership. Though, most people in my area in their 20s and 30s are the type to be already coupled up, settled down, and married. I say "Ironic" because it's a Meetup thats in a retirement community filled with the elderly. Perhaps the Meetup works for people who come in town to visit their grand parents or something, who knows, lol And I was like "Fine, screw it" and attend Meetups in the BIG city an hour away (like yourself). Meetups don't really work out in my area as most here aren't sociable anyhow and more homebodies if any thing. Couples here are pretty much joined at the hip and their social life mainly revolves around the 5 or 6 generations that grew up here....why attempt to make NEW friends when nieces, nephews, aunts, and uncles are prominent in your social life? My groups are small, because of the demographics, but big cities have large groups. The singles over 40 group in the city 1h away from me has over 2000 members. They have multiple activities every day. Yep, and thusly I do the commute to the big city Meetups...I do admit though, there are some that LIVE in my small town that commute to WORK in the big city an hour away. lol 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BluEyeL Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 Similar situation here, there are meetup groups but not for my age bracket and station in life, so I just opened two myself. If mountain won't come to Mohammed, then Mohammed must go to the mountain. It wasn't as easy, I've been stood up a few times, but I just wanted single friends and now I have them. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gaeta Posted February 22, 2015 Author Share Posted February 22, 2015 You actually expected a vibe when first greeting him a parking lot?? Not me. As we entered the coffee shop he dismissed me for not getting a good vibe from me in the parking lot. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gaeta Posted February 22, 2015 Author Share Posted February 22, 2015 Well, I think she just spoke of a single Meetup and she just gave it up completely and was questioning her diligence in continuing on. I mean, you can't just attend a single Meetup and give up after that. This has thread has gone on for too long as it seems she has an excuse for everything. Whatever is suggested to her, she always has an answer for something. I tried different kinds of meet ups but they were not singles meet up. For some reasons in my city there were no single meet ups for 40+ Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 Not me. As we entered the coffee shop he dismissed me for not getting a good vibe from me in the parking lot. Wow! that is incredibly rude and nasty. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 Well Geata a little update from me. 3 people started talking to me over the last few days. 1 has stopped. 1 is not asking any questions so suspect thats ending soon and 1 sounds very sweet and gentle but low on self esteem. He has written some really lovely messages though. All are from some distance away. 1 hr + (for the UK thats quite a lot!). Oh well at least someone wants to talk! I have a feeling that he is not ready for dating or a relationship at the moment though. We shall see... One day I might meet someone... I think it may be through other means! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gaeta Posted February 23, 2015 Author Share Posted February 23, 2015 Here is my Okcupid experience so far. I got 70 messages 25 messages from the US or UK (I am in Canada) (35%) 2 married men 22 messages from men under 35 (31%) 8 messages from age 35-40 2 scams (military man oversea looking for love of his life) 6 messages from men 45 - 46 closest to my age (49) (11%) 4 messages from men over 55 1 message from Alice For me, okcupid has been much worse than pof. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BlueIris Posted February 24, 2015 Share Posted February 24, 2015 Here is my Okcupid experience so far. I got 70 messages 25 messages from the US or UK (I am in Canada) (35%) 2 married men 22 messages from men under 35 (31%) 8 messages from age 35-40 2 scams (military man oversea looking for love of his life) 6 messages from men 45 - 46 closest to my age (49) (11%) 4 messages from men over 55 1 message from Alice For me, okcupid has been much worse than pof. :laugh: Alice? I am REALLY curious about Alice. So, ten messages from men in the right age range. Any of them look interesting? I think OKCupid has a very good idea with the questions and answers. I'd think that people are more likely to be honest about who they are if they aren't trying to impress a particular person, and it would be easier to start talking with someone who sees the world the way you do. Be picky, Gaeta. Choose to communicate with someone who is like you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gaeta Posted February 24, 2015 Author Share Posted February 24, 2015 :laugh: Alice? I am REALLY curious about Alice. So, ten messages from men in the right age range. Any of them look interesting? I think OKCupid has a very good idea with the questions and answers. I'd think that people are more likely to be honest about who they are if they aren't trying to impress a particular person, and it would be easier to start talking with someone who sees the world the way you do. Be picky, Gaeta. Choose to communicate with someone who is like you. Alice is the welcoming committee lol Among the men in my age range 1 I messaged him. A regular joe blow, a sure investment. He spent a day looking at my profile before replying 'I am good thanks and you'. I replied back, he has been looking at my profile for 2 days now and no reply back from him. Other man is 44 I think. He seemed interested but it takes him a couple of days to reply. Our first contact was at 11 pm Friday and he invited me to meet over drinks there and then. I've refused. That did not give me a good impression. Link to post Share on other sites
rester Posted February 24, 2015 Share Posted February 24, 2015 I have reached a new low. A 20 yo just messaged me: OH WOW, you look so much like my mother! You could have really messed with that kid with some dirty talk. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BlueIris Posted February 24, 2015 Share Posted February 24, 2015 Alice is the welcoming committee lol . Of course! Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass? Good name choice, there, OKCupid! Link to post Share on other sites
LurkerXX Posted February 24, 2015 Share Posted February 24, 2015 (edited) Go ask Alice...if he's 6 feet talllll. Edited February 24, 2015 by LurkerXX Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted February 24, 2015 Share Posted February 24, 2015 Here is my Okcupid experience so far. I got 70 messages 25 messages from the US or UK (I am in Canada) (35%) 2 married men 22 messages from men under 35 (31%) 8 messages from age 35-40 2 scams (military man oversea looking for love of his life) 6 messages from men 45 - 46 closest to my age (49) (11%) 4 messages from men over 55 1 message from Alice For me, okcupid has been much worse than pof. I can beat you. I have a Vicar. He seems quite nice actually. Bit pompus, we shall see, it might just be that he is nervous and guarded about it all, he has already admitted that he used a fake name to try and keep his identity a secret... Never a good sign. I didn't like to point out he has a blooming great picture up anyway... He likes rock and roll... Oh and a first meet on Sunday but who knows if it will actually go ahead... I am used to being stood up, ignored and always the bridesmaid never the bride... I still have men looking at me but not responding to messages... They keep looking some once a week, some every couple of days... beginning to think its a bunch of middle aged men who are looking at women and erm doing what men do with their "special" sock/ box of tissues. Link to post Share on other sites
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