he is moving and im in love with him! do i confess?

[sunburn98]

i have been friends with someone for over three years now.

 

we initally met at work, and promptly slept together (we seemed to have had a mutual attraction) which made for a bit of awkwardness, but nothing too bad. then he stood me up one night, and i was a little bitter with him over it....till he started showing up at a mutual coworkers house that i had been hanging out at.

 

as far as i know, they had never hung out together before, but quickly all three of us became friends.

 

a year later, when i moved due to a job transfer, the guy also put in for a transfer and moved, at almost the same time, and maintained contact with me.

 

in February of this last year, we went out to a party, and he kissed me (the first time in two years!) and then didnt call me for months.

when he finally started calling again, i confronted him with the issue and posed a question to him (we were STILL working for the same company at the time, he as a ops manager for a store i was working in) and i asked if we were "just friends drunk at a party or if he had feelings for me"

 

he quickly said that he was ok with the "friends drunk at a party" explanation of that kiss.

then i quit working for the same company as him and our relationship took another shift.

 

he began calling or text messaging me every day like clockwork, instead of just a couple of times a week. he comes to parties and shows, and bars with me, has hung out with my multiple cousins (whom i am very close to) and asks questions like ":whats your middle name? whats your fathers name?"

 

he started persuading me to spend the night on his airmatress at his apartment, and even went as far as buying me a toothbrush to keep there. iv taken to staying over when he goes on business trips, just to watch the place, and to have a little piece and quiet.

he told me one night he liked the thought of my being at his house, even when he wasnt home.

 

and now he is getting another job transfer. this time to Seattle.

 

do i confess im in love with him? i feel like he could feel the same way about me, but our job has always inhibited him, and after i quit, he had already told me we were just friends and felt like he couldnt take it back? he is notoriously shy with females, and i know he hasnt been seeing anyone else (cause we spend all our time together!)

could i just be all wrong about this?

[erika2610]

Sweetie, I would tell him. If he moves away without you tellin him, you're gonna regret it. And if he doesn't feel the same way.. which it sounds to me like he lies you, at least you'll know. But I def. would.

[Marshbear]

I would tell him. What do you have to lose? You will reget it if you don't know the truth. You need to know for your own self. If he returns the feelings then you can figure something out. If not he is moving anyway so you won't be bumping into him.

I say go for it.

[Miffy]

I agree - go for it, you will sooooooo regret it if you don't and will probably wonder what if for the rest of your life. Even if he says no because he is shocked at first he may go away and rethink.

 

At worst you will be where you are now, do it for all us who wish we could do the same.

 

If you don't ask, you don't get....

[HoldOn]

Hey,

 

he already knows that you like him. It seems that you are just convient for him at this time. But if he really liked you, he would have done something real about it by now. Like ask you on a date!

 

Tell him what you want, but I think you'll just get your feelings hurt.

[Naturalle]

I agree with Holdon. You`ve always been conveniently there for him whenever he needed you. If he liked you, I think he would have asked you out on a date or taken you out on dinner before asking you to watch over his house!However we will never know what`s inside his mind unless you ask him. I think you should go for it and tell him that you care.Don't say you love him though.Just ask him how he feels for you...how he feels going away from you.Best of luck!

[Illusion24]

I've been friends with someone for 10 years and now after all the tribulations and time passed by...I was tired of wondering "WHAT IF"...

 

If you truly feel you "love" him and want to pursue a relationship with him, I don't see any reason why you shouldn't. Now, you do have to face the fact that he may or may not respond the way you want him to. If he is leaving for a job keep in mind he will probably still leave. No matter what I wouldn't let him go without letting him know how you feel.

 

It would be some type of closer for you. You will be able to maybe find someone else because you knew in your heart you tried to save your love and it just didn't work. You don't have to be consciously thinking about ..."should I have told him...maybe he would have stayed"?

 

Do what your heart tells you...but remember be prepared, you might not get the response you were hoping for

[blue17]

Ya I would definitely tell him. One thing you should NOT do, however, is ask him how he feels about you. Girls speak more indirectly, whereas guys are more direct and miscommunications can occur.

 

When a girl says "How do you feel about me?" she is actually admitting her feelings towards a guy. However, sometimes a guy can misinterpret this. I'll tell you that even if I liked a girl, and she came up and said something like "Do you like me?" I would probably avoid the question or say no, as I don't want her to know I like her if I am not sure she likes me. You gotta be a little more direct and admit you want a relationship or something...basically show that you are interested and avoid indirect statements if possible to prevent any miscommunication. Good luck, babe.