KHSM Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 If you have read my thread I had an emotional affair last year for about a month, My husband wanted a break and completely ignored me. We started talking and he told me he hooked up with his co worker (the one I didn't trust) His excuse is "I didn't cheat, we weren't together at the time" I honestly don't know what to do. He's been wanting me to move back in but today he asked if I could stay at my families so he can move out and we can "take it slow" Opinions please, he's not even remorseful about what he did because when I start to cry he just sits there. I'm lost and confused. He's been to her house, they hang out outside of work and she's been in my car but to him they were just friends. Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby65 Posted February 21, 2015 Share Posted February 21, 2015 All I can say is.... wow. He says he wasn't cheating -- ??? In what universe? I don't know your past posts, but based on this I hope you have friends and family around to support you through this time. His behavior is simply inconceivable to me. He asked for a break to have this affair.... then claimed it wasn't cheating because you were on a break???? Link to post Share on other sites
regret143 Posted February 24, 2015 Share Posted February 24, 2015 you had an affair, he feels he deserve a piece of cake too. He stepped out of the marriage for the thing. Since you did it first, you should be very willing to forgive, otherwise why would he forgive you? Link to post Share on other sites
Rainbowlove Posted February 24, 2015 Share Posted February 24, 2015 If you have read my thread I had an emotional affair last year for about a month, My husband wanted a break and completely ignored me. We started talking and he told me he hooked up with his co worker (the one I didn't trust) His excuse is "I didn't cheat, we weren't together at the time" I honestly don't know what to do. He's been wanting me to move back in but today he asked if I could stay at my families so he can move out and we can "take it slow" Opinions please, he's not even remorseful about what he did because when I start to cry he just sits there. I'm lost and confused. He's been to her house, they hang out outside of work and she's been in my car but to him they were just friends. I'm sorry for your hurt. I don't believe in the you had an EA, so he is entitled to a PA theory. Two wrongs do not make a right. Also, a PA is not going to win back the trust in your marriage. I don't know your story, but are you in counseling? If not, seek help. Your EA was wrong. He is using your EA as an excuse to do whatever he wants. Do not move back with him until he is done with her and even then, I'd not rush home to him. The two of you have a lot of work to do as individuals and as a couple. This will not be a quick fix for your relationship, nor easy. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Priv Posted February 24, 2015 Share Posted February 24, 2015 It is called a revenge affair I think. Not that it excuses him, he should have just left you instead of stooping to cheating level. Which incidentally with the way things are going now, is what you should do. Link to post Share on other sites
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