Block06 Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 Even self improvement can become an obsession and I think it is an obsession these days especially on boards like this. Maybe part of self improvement is to stop obsessing on self improvement. I think there's got to be more to life than focusing on self improvement such as enjoying life sometimes and having fun but that's being discouraged. I don't think that thinking about self improvement every waking second is any idea of fun. It kind of makes life not worth living if I can't take a break from it and have fun. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
love1336x Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 Any sort of obsession is always bad. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Light Breeze Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 Dude, if you're thinking about self improvement every waking second, then you have a problem. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NGC1300 Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 As Sam Harris has said, even thinking continually positive thoughts is in itself mentally draining. Link to post Share on other sites
Ethan78 Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 There is a limit on how much you can read or think yourself into a better situation. It needs to be improvement through experience most the time. Link to post Share on other sites
GravityMan Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 I disagree that it's "overrated", but yes, obsessing over it (just like anything else) is not good for the person. I'm reminded of a guy who posted here a year or two ago (I believe his name was Krieger and he was in his 20s). He was going through some internal issues involving his nursing career situation and difficulties with women. Various forms of self-improvement were suggested to him. The problem is, he got really determined to put laser-focus on "improving himself" with damn near every spare second of his life. That concerned me and some others and we warned him not to go overboard with the whole self-improvement thing. Obsessing over it wouldn't make him a happier person...the opposite could very well happen. He could mentally crash hard if something outside of his control didn't go his way. We advised him that he should set aside some free time in his life at least a couple times per week...where he can just "let go" a bit and have fun and enjoy life (ideally with others, but even just by himself)...stop thinking about work, school, self-improvement, etc. during those times. (Of course, still maintain some basic common sense.) Get outside of his own head. Give himself a break, relax, be carefree and just live. Focusing too much on any one thing is never good for your mind, health, relationships, etc...including things that are positive and/or meant to improve oneself. Moderation is better, and have times where you can chill out and not take life so seriously. That said, emotionally stable individuals tend to remain fairly loose almost ALL of the time (i.e. they rarely get uptight), including times where the situation is serious or under pressure. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CrystalShine2011 Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 Obsession is bad! Link to post Share on other sites
almond Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 Even self improvement can become an obsession and I think it is an obsession these days especially on boards like this. Maybe part of self improvement is to stop obsessing on self improvement. I think there's got to be more to life than focusing on self improvement such as enjoying life sometimes and having fun but that's being discouraged. I don't think that thinking about self improvement every waking second is any idea of fun. It kind of makes life not worth living if I can't take a break from it and have fun. Having fun and enjoying life is a huge part of self improvement. This is being discouraged? By who exactly? What exactly do you think self improvement is? Judging by your post, I have a feeling that your definition is quite different from mine... Link to post Share on other sites
Sofarris Posted February 24, 2015 Share Posted February 24, 2015 Agreed, anyone that is constantly thinking about self improvement has an issue. However, self improvement can be a very powerful thing when done correctly. It has worked wonders for me. I feel more empowered, confident and happy than ever and I think a lot of that comes down to the changes I have made in my life and the results that I have seen off the back of them. There are two things that I think are important though. 1. Don't chastise yourself if you slip up. Getting fit has been a big motivation for me but some days I still eat something I shouldn't or even miss a work out to go out for dinner or something. If you're hard on yourself when this happens it can be damaging. 2. Reward yourself. When things go right due to your hard work and diligence I think it's important to reward yourself. If you're constantly pushing yourself and not stopping to reflect and say 'well done' it can become very draining. Link to post Share on other sites
TaxAHCruel Posted February 24, 2015 Share Posted February 24, 2015 I think there's got to be more to life than focusing on self improvement such as enjoying life sometimes and having fun but that's being discouraged. Perhaps you are simply doing it wrong. Self improvement and fun are not mutually exclusive and I can think of no way in my life through which I have sought to better myself - that I did not enjoy and have fun with. Not sure what you are specifically doing under the banner of "self improvement" that has led you to this description of it - but your description simply matches nothing I have done or witnessed. Link to post Share on other sites
Erica Faith Posted February 25, 2015 Share Posted February 25, 2015 Of course it is. Too much of a good thing can be bad for anyone. You don't have to let it run your life. It's there if you so choose it. Think of it as optional upgrades. Link to post Share on other sites
SerCay Posted February 28, 2015 Share Posted February 28, 2015 Maybe the term sounds better when we say: The road to self love... Self improvement sounds as if something's wrong with you, when in essence, I think this concept was developed to make us love ourselves more. Maybe some people love themselves better if they are in the right shape, others when they finish their studies etc etc, all these stepping stones are about reaching goals that make you proud of yourself. It all starts with accepting the way you are and starting to love yourself at this exact moment, then slowly reaching your personal goals. Whether that be studying, having kids, being a Buddhist, Vegan etc etc. Everybody has their own. Self love...is the most important ingredient of a happy life. I have gone through this journey and I absolutely think it's essential. Link to post Share on other sites
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