stephon3mn Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 So basically this girl i work with ended up fallin in love with me...i fell in love with her and we maintained a outside relationship on the sneak....this has been goin on for a year and half and she talked about kids,growing old, etc..she called me her soulmate...shes in school as well as workin so it seemed like she was only with him as a anchor for financial support.....everything was almost perfect hoping she would leave in in april when shes finished with school.....we talked every single day all the time....and now outta nowhere she just stopped talking to me....does anyone have any advice for me and on why she would just do that? im emotionally invested shes only the second girl i ever told i love and i just dont know what to do we both agreed we were perfect for each other and soulmates...how do i handle our work situation cause i see her everyday Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 If she was SOOOOOO in love with you, why was the relationship secret and....seriously, she had a boyfriend the whole time. Come on. You need to treat her like she's nothing. She cheated, she lied and has no moral compass. Is that someone you want to be with? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author stephon3mn Posted February 23, 2015 Author Share Posted February 23, 2015 If she was SOOOOOO in love with you, why was the relationship secret and....seriously, she had a boyfriend the whole time. Come on. You need to treat her like she's nothing. She cheated, she lied and has no moral compass. Is that someone you want to be with? i mean i knew about the relationship....i just thought she was goin to leave him for me Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 i mean i knew about the relationship....i just thought she was goin to leave him for me So, you learned a life lesson. The constant in this story is that she cheated and lied for over a year. Do you really want that? Eventually she'd do it to you too. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
anika99 Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 When you observe somebody lying, cheating, and using their bf for money you should assume that they are capable as treating you just as poorly. Link to post Share on other sites
bubbaganoosh Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 Plain as day, she was using her boyfriend and for some reason or maybe you just didn't want to see that if she is capable of doing that with her boyfriend, what makes you think she wouldn't do the same to you huh? Your problem is your looking at her with your little head instead of your big head, she knows it and you don't so IMO you were to be her next victim. One other thing. What if her boyfriend found out about it. You ready for a night of "LET'S GET READY TO RUMMMMMMMMBLLLLE". You have no idea how he would react and when you least expect it you be confronted with a guy who has vengeance on his mind and is bound and determined to get his pound of flesh and pint of blood.............mainly yours so this might be a blessing in disguise. Just one more thing. Don't know if you've ever been in her boyfriends shoes but I have and so have others on this forum and I got to tell you, it's not a pleasant thing to have to endure. You better wise up and stop taking what isn't yours or you just might have a night to remember. Link to post Share on other sites
Author stephon3mn Posted February 23, 2015 Author Share Posted February 23, 2015 so should i tell her bf? even tho i truley care about her and it will prob ruin her life Link to post Share on other sites
almond Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 This whole time you were screwing her behind her boyfriend's back, you thought she was using him. Playing him for a fool. You found out the hard way that she took you both for a ride. Sure - tell him if that's what you want to do. In my opinion, he has a right to know before he makes the mistake of marrying this woman. Let this be a lesson to you - you played with fire, quite happy to burn someone else...and now you're burning too. Do unto others.. Link to post Share on other sites
Lady2163 Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 I'm guessing you are 25 or younger? That doesn't mean anything bad, just it was a boyfriend, not husband and she is going to school and working, which often means younger. I'm not sure how telling her boyfriend would ruin her life. She might have to find a new place to live? She might have to drop out of school for a semester? She might have to work two jobs and take only one or two classes at a time? While those are all very stressful, they are not life wrecking. I am assuming there are no kids involved. Yup, kids will change everything. If there are children involved, I would hesitate to tell the boyfriend. Chances are, boyfriend has seen some of her negative personality attributes already. There's no way to predict how the boyfriend will react. He may physically attack you. She may lie completely about how you in some way "forced" her into this. As many OW will tell you, when push comes to shove, they are the first ones sacrificed to make the cheater look better than they are. Fear for your safety, concern for your workplace harmony tells me NOT to tell the boyfriend. Link to post Share on other sites
Darren Steez Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 i mean i knew about the relationship....i just thought she was goin to leave him for me You thought wrong. She's a cheater and she was with him for financial support. She's a user, she used you for what she wanted and she tossed you, just like she said she was going to toss her guy when the time was right. That's the kind of person she is. You're better off without. Link to post Share on other sites
Author stephon3mn Posted February 23, 2015 Author Share Posted February 23, 2015 i just dont know how to handle the situation...like how do i get over my feelings for her cause everyday i see her at work they come up on the happiness i did have from her...how do i get over that...i know people will say move on but i dont personally connect and have chemistry like i had with her Link to post Share on other sites
jellybean89 Posted February 24, 2015 Share Posted February 24, 2015 If she was SOOOOOO in love with you, why was the relationship secret and....seriously, she had a boyfriend the whole time. Come on. You need to treat her like she's nothing. She cheated, she lied and has no moral compass. Is that someone you want to be with? I love your avatar! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jellybean89 Posted February 24, 2015 Share Posted February 24, 2015 i just dont know how to handle the situation...like how do i get over my feelings for her cause everyday i see her at work they come up on the happiness i did have from her...how do i get over that...i know people will say move on but i dont personally connect and have chemistry like i had with her Give it time....you will find it with someone else .. life is full of opportunities. She isn't able to give you what you want and need so you have to let her go and just move on with your life. Link to post Share on other sites
Author stephon3mn Posted February 25, 2015 Author Share Posted February 25, 2015 its just so depressing for me...like feel like dying inside and out...sux Link to post Share on other sites
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