startinganew777 Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 I planned a trip with my good friend for this coming June to go to Florida for a week. We go every year and have been for 5 years. It is a timeshare from one of my fellow employees and I usually pay her in Dec. for the condo so she can pay the timeshare and there are no refunds. So my friend said she was in, paid me her half, $200, in Dec. and then I paid the lady that owns the timeshare. This morning my friend tells me she can no longer go because someone at her job requested off the same before she did. So now I am in a bind and can't find anyone else to go with me. My best friend is having her second child in April, my other good friend just got back from Naples and doesn't have vacation time saved up, my sister will be out of town that same week, my parents can't go and I am single so no boyfriend to ask. I am out of options. I am totally bummed out but can't get a refund so thinking of maybe going by myself. I have had a rough year and it would be good to go relax on the beach, and take some time for myself. I live by myself, live paycheck to paycheck and this trip is pretty cheap and usually my only vacation for the whole year. Well, my friend wants her $200 back because she backed out. I am struggling to save money up for a flight and rental car on my own right now and now she wants me to fork over her $200! I wouldn't have planned the vacation if she couldn't go. Am I wrong in thinking that unless me or her can find someone to replace her, that I shouldn't have to pay her back that $200? Like I said, I wouldn't have planned on going on the vacation if she couldn't go. Link to post Share on other sites
newmoon Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 imo, she is owed the refund right away based on the amount of notice she has given you and her reliability in the past. if this person has gone for 5 years, splits her costs normally, and is legitimately not able to get out of work then she is being an upfront, honest and reliable friend to you. $200 is very small, especially compared to the friendship you'll lose if you don't refund. plus, she has given you 4 months!! to find someone else and it is your responsibility to find someone, not her. she has given you ample time, but this would be a completely different story if it was 3 weeks before the trip or something. give her back her money asap to show no hurt feelings, and then either go alone or keep looking for a person to split. Link to post Share on other sites
Author startinganew777 Posted February 23, 2015 Author Share Posted February 23, 2015 Thing is I wouldn't have went on the trip this year if she wouldn't have told me she could go! I really don't want to go by myself and wouldn't have been able to afford it all by myself. She talked me into it and why she didn't tell her work in Dec. when we paid the condo fee is beyond me. I told my work right away. I can't really afford just to fork over $200 right now when I wasn't expecting to and save up for the trip. LIke I said, I live paycheck to paycheck. I only go on these trips if someone can go with me and split half the costs. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 Let me ask you, though, did she pay for her airfare, or did she just never do it thinking she might not go? Did she get stuck with all that expense? Tell her the lady said it's no refunds, but that you'll ask the lady nicely to let you out of the deal. But if she doesn't let you out and you decide not to go alone, I do not see why you should have to pay her half! You'll be losing your own half. The other thing you could propose is if the lady says no refund, you could offer her to only do a partial refund and she'd be free to rent out the timeshare. She might go for that. So she refunds half, and you use that to refund $100 to yourself and $100 to your friend. But if you both cancel, she cannot expect you to pay for that considering she caused it. If the lady won't refund anything, if you have to cancel, I wouldn't refund your friend because you can't afford to eat $400 or $300. If you decide to go on the trip though, you should at least refund $100 (split the difference) with your friend, only because she's been reliable in the past. It's not easy to get someone to go on vacation, so if that's her only reasoning why, then I recommend you go along with that and say, Okay, once I get a replacement, I will refund your money, with the understanding that if you don't find a replacement, there will be no refund OR only $100. I mean, it's not fair if you want to go for it to cost you $200 extra dollars. So probably you should cancel the trip so she understands this is costing you money too. Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 Explain the problem to your friend and offer to refund her the $200, but that it will have to come in small payments because of the bind you are now in by having to go alone and don't have the lump sum. Give her $5.00 or $10.00 a week until it is paid off. Better that than to lose the friendship. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 Whose name is on the rental agreement (I'm a timeshare landlord too)? IMO, I'd offer to pay her 50 bucks a month, which would pay her in full by the time the interval was utilized, and continue to seek out a vacation-mate. As a landlord, I offer tenants the option for a refund based on my ability to re-rent the interval, less costs of rental. So, if they paid me two grand for the interval and my net after costs ends up being 1800, they get 1800. The problem with low-cost timeshares (400 bucks for a week is low-cost) is that re-renting them or re-jiggering the unit if in a floating season is cost intensive, so landlords generally don't offer the option for refunds. The other option is to walk away from the deal, take the 200.00 hit on your half and let the friendship end up where it does. I mention this since you've made no travel arrangements as of yet, which will likely far exceed the cost of the timeshare. I dealt with this kind of stuff while married and just wrote it off to how life went and my investment in friends wasn't sufficient to let such matters concern me. The friends who are still around are still around and those who aren't, aren't. Life goes on. Most people operate in their own self-interest, with your friend being a prime example here. Learn from that. Note that, if you take her word as truth, she didn't secure the time off before committing to the timeshare interval. Interesting, isn't it? Link to post Share on other sites
Author startinganew777 Posted February 23, 2015 Author Share Posted February 23, 2015 We have not booked flights or a rental car yet because we always do that closer to the date to try and get cheaper flights. I know this has nothing to do with the trip but she has been using my washer and dryer for 2 years for free, she was supposed to pay me for them and she has a couch of mine she is using. I am always there to help her out and then this happens and she wants the money back. I have no problem paying her if I can find someone else to go. I am out no money then. But since she committed to me so far in advance, it makes me mad to have to pay her because she screwed up and didn't ask off for that week in time. I hate to cancel the trip and will probably try to keep finding someone to go, but yeah, I may just have to walk away and eat the $200 I paid already. For sure then I will NOT pay her back. Landlord is a lady I work with and the condo is about $400 a month so it would put her in a bind if I canceled on her or expected money back. I can't do that to her though because her family doesn't have a lot of money and I don't want her out $400. I could never ask for that back. I may be able to switch the week around but then I run into the problem of not being able to take off since I already requested this week. Link to post Share on other sites
newmoon Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 maybe i make way too much money or something, but how poor does someone have to be that they hold $200 hostage? that is a very very very low amount and since no other items have been paid for she's entitled to it back - lump sum. if someone told me i'd get it back in $10-15 dollar installments i'd probably kick their... behind :-) Link to post Share on other sites
rester Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 (edited) Did she know this was non-refundable when she paid in December? If so, she's responsible even if she doesn't go. That said, ask yourself if $200 is worth your friendship. If I was in your position, I'd do my best to pay her back but explain that you're out the money, too, unless you can find someone else to go. Discuss a compromise with her and maybe a payment plan like $20/month for ten months. In ten years you're going to look back on this and wonder why you were worried about $200. maybe i make way too much money or something, but how poor does someone have to be that they hold $200 hostage? that is a very very very low amount and since no other items have been paid for she's entitled to it back - lump sum. if someone told me i'd get it back in $10-15 dollar installments i'd probably kick their... behind :-) It's also the friend's responsibility to not put a $200 non-refundable deposit down without accepting that she may lose it. Edited February 23, 2015 by rester Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 Landlord is a lady I work with and the condo is about $400 a month so it would put her in a bind if I canceled on her or expected money back. I can't do that to her though because her family doesn't have a lot of money and I don't want her out $400. I could never ask for that back. Since this is a known individual with whom you've had past dealings and, wow, 400 bucks for a month in a condo (!), see if she'd mind a sublet. You have plenty of time to give that option a shot and it leaves the opportunity for everyone to walk away whole, though you'd be making vacation plans other than that particular condo, if at all. Link to post Share on other sites
Author startinganew777 Posted February 23, 2015 Author Share Posted February 23, 2015 Yeah Newmoon, $200 to me is a lot when I live on my own and live paycheck to paycheck. She knew it was non refundable when she gave it to me. She has known every year we go it is non refundable. It is like a deposit to the landlord (lady at work) so we get the condo and then we worry about the rest of the money later on, flight, rental, whatever. So yes, it is like a deposit. Sorry I am not as rich as you are. My friend on the other hand has money to blow but at the same time knows my financial position and that I am tight on money. Link to post Share on other sites
Author startinganew777 Posted February 23, 2015 Author Share Posted February 23, 2015 Carhill, it is for a week, not a month. I wish it were for a month! Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 Since this whole circumstance came about because of an action by the friend, unilaterally seeking to terminate their participation and seek a 'refund', then task them to advocate on their own behalf. Since you know the person at work, find out the options available and task the friend to work them. There's a fine line between acting to preserve friendships and rolling over on one's own boundaries. Each person decides that line for themselves. You know your circumstances and boundaries best. I think you'll find a way. It'll work out. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
central Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 IMO, your friend agreed to go and paid her money, knowing it was not refundable, so she should not expect a refund (unless you can find someone to replace her on the trip). It was her responsibility to ensure she had the time off. Unless the person from whom you're renting agrees to cancel the reservation and refund all the money, there is nothing you can do or should do about this. If she'd paid the money to a rental agent, she would not get it back - just because you are her friend does not obligate you to do so. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 If she was supposed to pay for the washer/dryer, I'd tell her you'll call that even. Because that's not right. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author startinganew777 Posted February 24, 2015 Author Share Posted February 24, 2015 Well I asked my parents and although my mom said she probably can't get off work, my dad REALLY wants to go. LOL Never been on vacation with just my dad but he is 59 years old and it very well may be the last time we ever get to go to on vacation together. He joked and told me he was more fun than my friend anyways! LOL He does not think I should pay her back but now that I have someone to go, I will. I still think it is BS that she would commit BEFORE she asked her work but I guess that is a lesson for her. So everything worked out I guess. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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