beachlover965 Posted February 25, 2015 Share Posted February 25, 2015 I am 18, still in college and I want a baby but the problem is, my parents won't approve, I still live with my parents, I don't have a job and I don't have a boyfriend. The reason that I want a baby soon is because I want to experience what pregnancy is like and I also feel like I will get a lot more attention. I also get lonely at home and I barely go out because I honestly don't have any friends to hang out with. They say motherhood is hard and tiring but I think I can handle it because I think it is worth it. Is it wrong of me to want a baby at my age and for me to think this way? Link to post Share on other sites
bathtub-row Posted February 26, 2015 Share Posted February 26, 2015 (edited) I wouldn't say it was wrong but it is very immature and not very well thought-out. You're in college and have no friends? How can that be? If you think you're stuck now, just have a child out of wedlock and see what that does for you. It will completely tie you down and limit your possibilities. And if you haven't finished your degree and don't have a job, how do you plan to feed and take care of this baby? Having a kid is a very serious undertaking and doing this without any resources is just plain not smart. And there's nothing really novel about being pregnant. Just about every female in the world can pull that off. Do you want to be one of those women who has nowhere to turn, who depends on others, who lives on welfare? I gotta ask what are you thinking, really. You have the whole world in front of you, your possibilities are limitless and you want to dig a hole for yourself and bury your life. What's that about exactly? Edited February 26, 2015 by bathtub-row 2 Link to post Share on other sites
optomistic_nonsense Posted March 9, 2015 Share Posted March 9, 2015 I have to agree with bathtub 100%. I know this may seem harsh but wanting a baby for the reasons you listed above seem selfish to me. What kind of life will that baby have? What income will support it? Dont you want to meet someone and share such a wonderful experience WITH them? Enjoy being young now, find people to hang out with and go out. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
mrs rubble Posted March 10, 2015 Share Posted March 10, 2015 I felt like that at the same age and did fall pregnant. However my mother forced me to terminate the pregnancy telling me I was too young, had no way of supporting my baby and loads of other things I should experience before I had a baby. Of course I didn't believe her and thought she was just being nasty making me terminate my pregnancy. The desire to be a mum didn't disappear though and I ended up pregnant again at 20yo, I had a boyfriend, I had just quailified in my chosen field and decided I would have this baby, despite the protests of my mother (again) and my boyfriend. I had my baby anyway. I had no idea how difficult it would be! I had very little support, my relationship with my baby's dad didn't last, so I basically raised my son on my own, even with a decent wage because of my decent quailifications, I struggled financially. I often felt more alone than I did before I became a mum, as I was always stuck at home while my friends were out partying. If I lived my life over again, I'd wait until I'd worked for a while, saved money, seen a bit more of the world and found the perfect father to share the parenting with before having children. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
still_an_Angel Posted March 11, 2015 Share Posted March 11, 2015 Having kids is a huge responsibility, how will you support this baby? You need to think of this child's life, not just your needs and your perception that having this child will move you out of your loneliness. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Lion Heart Posted April 12, 2015 Share Posted April 12, 2015 Hi beachlover, You are obviously lonely. Having a baby 24/7 is like having an alarm clock set on "random". They poo a REAL lot and consume litres of breast milk. Parenthood is NOT and I repeat NOT a lifelong venture to be going into for the reasons you list EVER. Who would care for the baby whilst you complete your study? Some parents kick their pregnant teen out. Then they've got to pay rent. Anyhow just ponder REAL hard your son or daughter growing up, asking about their father. Or their gene pool or their ancestry. Are you gonna get some random guys sperm? How would HE feel about being a surprise dad? Gosh so many things you have not thought through. If you've got a nurturing side and you want it nourished, get a dog, cat or budgie. Help out as a volunteer at the local pet shelter. You could even make some great friends there too. For a real fast eye opener, volunteer at your local women's shelter too. You'd be able to hold or mind PLENTY of babies there. Or get approval to help in the maternity wards at your local hospital. There may be babies on drug withdrawal who need cuddling. Enjoy your young life. Put in effort to make friends at college. Join interest groups. Ask your parents to pay half for a group tour travelling to anywhere! Lion Heart. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
DatingDirection Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 I am 18, still in college and I want a baby but the problem is, my parents won't approve, I still live with my parents, I don't have a job and I don't have a boyfriend. The reason that I want a baby soon is because I want to experience what pregnancy is like and I also feel like I will get a lot more attention. I also get lonely at home and I barely go out because I honestly don't have any friends to hang out with. They say motherhood is hard and tiring but I think I can handle it because I think it is worth it. Is it wrong of me to want a baby at my age and for me to think this way? Take it from a child whose parents were never able to provide for me at all. Don't have a child at this time. And the reasons you mentioned are not good reasons, sorry, but your parents need to show you more love, so you don't have to feel that you need a baby to express your love, and feel loved back. If your parents can't do this, then show yourself love, by treating yourself to good nutritious food, manicure, and physical activities you enjoy. You can also create things like art, it doesn't have to be a baby. Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted April 18, 2015 Share Posted April 18, 2015 Having a baby at 18, while you're attending college and have NO boyfriend, let alone husband, is EXTREMELY immature and destructive. That you would even consider it a legitimate option scares me. Link to post Share on other sites
phreckles Posted April 19, 2015 Share Posted April 19, 2015 Do you expect your parents to pay for everything? Would you really be a responsible mother if you can't provide for your own child? Please don't use a baby to get attention. How would you feel if you were to find out that was the reason your mother had you? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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