Why does Hubby hide the Viagra?

[Melodrama]

I'm a very private person so this is going to be difficult. After 15 years I recently realized I don't trust my H. I've had my head immersed in having babies, running a household and now only recently noticed odd indiscretions. I married him because he was moral. Am I over-reacting??

 

I have found hidden in a fanny pack Lavitra and another labido medication. I was with him when he bought the first medication (L) and showed me 4 pills (we used one). He had thrown away the box so I couldn't see how many were supposed to be in it. He said there were only 4. Well I recently found another 4 unopened. And some he apparently bought on the internet. I have not yet confronted him with it, thinking maybe I should track it and see if any is used when I am not available. What baffles me is I am attractive and have taken care of myself. My figure, by most standards is nearly perfect. The sex is awesome, most of the time. So what would compel my H to do this? I am home with the kids while he is often away on business. He hasn't lost interest in me sexually, but he is not sweet and considerate like he used to be. I have also found he has recently subscribed to Playboy without my knowledge and is hiding it. He does purchase porn and again, doesn't know I know about "all of it".

 

I even recently found out he has a female "friend" whom he knows from his travels and hasn't told me about. She seems to know all about him though. I feel defeated and hurt. Sometimes I am angry and want to lash out, but most of the time I just want him to love me. What do you think? Should I be concerned with his behavior? I often tease him about "other women" but he says there hasn't been anyone else.[color=indigo][/color]

[HotCaliGirl]

I'm sorry to hear about this. To me it sounds like he is cheating on you, especially while away on the business trips. I don't think that it has anything to do with you - you seem like you love him and as you say the sex is good and you look good etc. He might be addicted to sex or else is just a sneaky bastard having sex with other women.

 

I hope I'm wrong and that you are getting the wrong idea when there is really no problem. But the erection pills he bought behind your back, the porn behind your back, and the other female... plus he is not as sweet to you, maybe because he feels guilty for betraying you or is selfish to blame you for causing him to feel guilty. I would keep an eye out on your banking and credit card accounts just in case he wants to ditch you or you decide to leave him so that you and your children are not left with nothing.

[Cecelius]

The porn is not cheating; he probably likes a little private time.

 

The ED drugs may be for your benefit; only time will tell.

 

The "female friend" thing is shady; I'd watch that.

 

At the moment, you don't have much other than a middle aged man who wants to make sure the equipment still works.

[Pocky]

Am I over-reacting??

 

Maybe. Maybe not.

 

I have found hidden in a fanny pack Lavitra and another labido medication. I was with him when he bought the first medication (L) and showed me 4 pills (we used one). He had thrown away the box so I couldn't see how many were supposed to be in it.

 

How do you know he threw the box away so that you wouldn't know how many are in the box? How do you know that was his motive and not something else? Are you just guessing? It seems to me like you're guessing.

 

He said there were only 4. Well I recently found another 4 unopened. And some he apparently bought on the internet. I have not yet confronted him with it, thinking maybe I should track it and see if any is used when I am not available.

 

So the four you found were they in the box or were they all removed from the box?

 

 

I have also found he has recently subscribed to Playboy without my knowledge and is hiding it. He does purchase porn and again, doesn't know I know about "all of it".

 

This doesn't mean he's cheating.

 

I even recently found out he has a female "friend" whom he knows from his travels and hasn't told me about. She seems to know all about him though.

 

How do you know she knows all about him? Have you spoken to her?

[Mz. Pixie]

I don't think it means he's cheating because he had drugs for ED.

 

Maybe he bought the first ones and decided he needed them (obviously he bought them for some reason) and decided to have a stash on hand for performance issues in your lovemaking? It could be that he is embarrassed for needing to rely on something like that? ED doesn't really have much to do with the wife- it's a physical issue.

 

The female friend could be shady so I'd be a little cautious and watch credit card bills and cell phone bills to see if anything is up with that.

[Squirrelly]

Post topic says "Viagra," you mention Levitra.

I don't know which he's actually got, but a Viagra prescription is 5 pills per container. (And not all insurance covers Viagra... This can be expensive. Bigtime. Like, $130 per scrip, which is what I paid.)

Have you considered that he's hiding them not to hide _them_ but to hide the fact that he's going to the expense? Obviously the cost really adds up. Perhaps he'd like you not to know, because he doesn't want you to object to the expense? Levitra is also very pricey (hence ordering cheaper on the 'net?) This is just a guess, but I thought you'd benefit from someone who's taken Viagra and paid out of pocket.

 

That said, IMO, you are MASSIVELY overreacting. You were suspicious at the outset about the pill count, and now are looking for things to buttress your possible conclusion. Do a LOT more work on this, like Mz. Pixie suggests -- check phone bills. Watch for actual suspicious behavior. I think Cecelius is right. Keep an eye on the situation of course, but there is not, so far, anything substantive to worry about.