I_Give_Up67 Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 LifeWasted, after giving some more thought to the situation of the WGF's friend "snitching" on her, and the way the friend behaved tonight, is it possible the whole thing was planned? How far fetched would it be to think the WGF put her friend up to deliver that news to you? I know I may be a bit of a cynic when it comes to the friends of the WGF, but I would not trust them or their motivations ever again. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeWasted Posted March 13, 2015 Author Share Posted March 13, 2015 Really? That's what you got out of it? I read it as his first step toward taking her back. I mean, now he "doesn't know how to feel". And I don't care one way or the other because some people just don't want to start over. Some people would rather be secure than happy, and I understand that feeling. Whatever OP decides to do isn't going to be determined by anything anyone on this forum says to him. That's probably a good thing. Get this through your skull. I'm not getting back with her. Christ.... 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeWasted Posted March 13, 2015 Author Share Posted March 13, 2015 I agree with your surmising about exes M. She was FAR too good at it for her to still be learning how to cheat. She's an expert. She aimed to retain that lifestyle with you as an innocent participant. You're out. Not your game. Yeah who cares what the friend of hers is doing / thinking / texting. .. nothing. They're ALL nothing to you now. No pondering. Just blocking. You've moved fast. You've done so well. It's a matter of simultaneously putting distance between you and that past plus building your new social life - safely. Are there new places you can drink / eat. Etc. It's best to avoid the places "they" frequent Unless of course you want to run into them. Your choice. LH They don't go to that sports bar. It's much too blue collar for that stuck up crowd. I'll bet that chick was meeting a guy there behind her husband's back she looked like a deer in the headlights when she saw me. But I'm going to go where I want to go when I want to go, whether I cross paths with my WGF or not. If I see her out on a date with some chump, I'll smile and act polite and then go about my business as if she's not there. I'm not going to sweat it. I'm not going to hide. I'm not going to give up my freedom just to avoid her and her idiot friends. I am here to stay. A thorn in her side. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeWasted Posted March 13, 2015 Author Share Posted March 13, 2015 LifeWasted, after giving some more thought to the situation of the WGF's friend "snitching" on her, and the way the friend behaved tonight, is it possible the whole thing was planned? How far fetched would it be to think the WGF put her friend up to deliver that news to you? I know I may be a bit of a cynic when it comes to the friends of the WGF, but I would not trust them or their motivations ever again. She's a married chick who never goes to that sports bar. Naw....she was there to meet her jockey. I don't think she meant for me to find out. I really don't. That friend of hers was pissed and genuinely upset when she told me about it. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
drifter777 Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Get this through your skull. I'm not getting back with her. Christ.... ten characters... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
irishguy Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Did she ever admit to how long it has been going on . 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeWasted Posted March 13, 2015 Author Share Posted March 13, 2015 Did she ever admit to how long it has been going on . They started flirting last October. Link to post Share on other sites
irishguy Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Whatever you do dont let this put you off dating ,you are guaranteed to learn from this , i bet you would spot red flags in future .Id talk to your lawyer friend and see what he has to say ,then put this behind you .And if you got on well with your exs daughter i would meet with her once just to say goodbye.You should do it as soon as you can so you can close the chapter completely . 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeWasted Posted March 14, 2015 Author Share Posted March 14, 2015 I went by the daughter's school today and caught her in the parking lot. Gave her a big hug and told her I would be there for her if she needs me. I unblocked her number too. It was heartbreaking. I really got attached to her. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted March 14, 2015 Share Posted March 14, 2015 I went by the daughter's school today and caught her in the parking lot. Gave her a big hug and told her I would be there for her if she needs me. I unblocked her number too. It was heartbreaking. I really got attached to her. That must have been really difficult for you both. How did she react when she saw you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeWasted Posted March 14, 2015 Author Share Posted March 14, 2015 That must have been really difficult for you both. How did she react when she saw you? She smiled and then gave me a big hug and then we just kind Of cried. She says she hates her mom. Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted March 14, 2015 Share Posted March 14, 2015 She smiled and then gave me a big hug and then we just kind Of cried. She says she hates her mom. That poor girl! And I feel bad for you too because that is just gut wrenching sad. Her mom's not exactly a good relationship role model for her is she. Maybe she should see a school counselor for a while, do you think? To help her adjust to the breakup and to your absence at home? What does your gut tell you? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Hope Shimmers Posted March 14, 2015 Share Posted March 14, 2015 She smiled and then gave me a big hug and then we just kind Of cried. She says she hates her mom. I read this whole thread. Something seems off to me. Am I the only one? Good luck OP. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
HereNorThere Posted March 14, 2015 Share Posted March 14, 2015 She smiled and then gave me a big hug and then we just kind Of cried. She says she hates her mom. I understand you have bonded with child, I really do. However, from a legal standpoint, please watch your back. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Lion Heart Posted March 14, 2015 Share Posted March 14, 2015 I went by the daughter's school today and caught her in the parking lot. Gave her a big hug and told her I would be there for her if she needs me. I unblocked her number too. It was heartbreaking. I really got attached to her. This daughter probably realises that you were a stable influence - maybe the ONLY one if all accounts of her mother and father are even remotely correct. At her young age I hope she takes something away from this besides sadness and that is that infidelity is bound to hurt SOME ONE and usually when it all comes out, it can be shattering to many people. Life lessons hard learnt. I hope she learnt something at least. LW just be careful there. You may be a very honorable man BUT OPs including parents can get really weird about these relationships continuing regardless of their innocence. Not insinuating, just see weird assumptions, accusations and worse, charges laid on people regularly in my work. It pays to protect yourself. I would make sure NEVER to be alone with this girl. ALWAYS meet in a very public place in daylight, if at all. Sometimes other relationships are collateral damage. Sad but true. Just trying to watch your back. LH 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeWasted Posted March 14, 2015 Author Share Posted March 14, 2015 I understand you have bonded with child, I really do. However, from a legal standpoint, please watch your back. I will. I'm not going to try to continue a relationship with her. I'll just be here if she needs a friend. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeWasted Posted March 14, 2015 Author Share Posted March 14, 2015 I read this whole thread. Something seems off to me. Am I the only one? Good luck OP. Thank you for your input. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeWasted Posted March 14, 2015 Author Share Posted March 14, 2015 This daughter probably realises that you were a stable influence - maybe the ONLY one if all accounts of her mother and father are even remotely correct. At her young age I hope she takes something away from this besides sadness and that is that infidelity is bound to hurt SOME ONE and usually when it all comes out, it can be shattering to many people. Life lessons hard learnt. I hope she learnt something at least. LW just be careful there. You may be a very honorable man BUT OPs including parents can get really weird about these relationships continuing regardless of their innocence. Not insinuating, just see weird assumptions, accusations and worse, charges laid on people regularly in my work. It pays to protect yourself. I would make sure NEVER to be alone with this girl. ALWAYS meet in a very public place in daylight, if at all. Sometimes other relationships are collateral damage. Sad but true. Just trying to watch your back. LH Good advice. Thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeWasted Posted March 14, 2015 Author Share Posted March 14, 2015 Out apartment hunting today. I feel sad but also hopeful. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted March 14, 2015 Share Posted March 14, 2015 Out apartment hunting today. I feel sad but also hopeful. Good luck apartment hunting. Do you have any kind of emotional support system of friends to help you through this situation? Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeWasted Posted March 14, 2015 Author Share Posted March 14, 2015 Good luck apartment hunting. Do you have any kind of emotional support system of friends to help you through this situation? No. Most of the people I hung out with here were her friends and their husbands. I have no family. Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted March 14, 2015 Share Posted March 14, 2015 No. Most of the people I hung out with here were her friends and their husbands. I have no family. Anyone you can call back home for emotional support at all? This really isn't the kind of trauma you go through alone. You need support for yourself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LifeWasted Posted March 14, 2015 Author Share Posted March 14, 2015 Anyone you can call back home for emotional support at all? This really isn't the kind of trauma you go through alone. You need support for yourself. No. That's why I'm here on LS. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted March 14, 2015 Share Posted March 14, 2015 No. That's why I'm here on LS. Well hopefully you feel supported here. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
sandylee1 Posted March 14, 2015 Share Posted March 14, 2015 LW You'll be just fine. I know it's early days, but time will help. I just never understand why people risk a good relationship like this. Pure selfishness and immaturity. Look after yourself. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts