Kira Onime Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 Hello, my fiance broke up with me 6 months ago after 4 years of relationship. After our break-up she started talking to a guy after a short period of time and after a couple of weeks from our break-up she told me she wanted to start a relationship with that guy, they even dated and even kissed. But she found out that guy was a liar and he had already a girlfriend. After our break-up I told her that if she was going to be with another man I will never be able to love her again and we wouldn't have any future together. Knowing that we would have no future together if she will be with someone else she decided she wanted to start a relationship with that guy, didn't work out between them. After that experience with this guy she started contacting me almost on a daily basis, everytime with a different reason, that kept going for couple of months until 13 Feb where i invited her out and after the date I told her that we have no future and there is no reason for us to be friends so I removed her from Facebook and deleted her number and we haven't talked ever since. It's a month now since we last saw each other and now i'm thinking, am i being absurd? I mean, it's normal to want to be with someone else after our failed relationship, but we loved each other (so we said), but after i found out she had interest in another man, i can't forgive her for that, i won't be able to tell her "i love you" ever again. Am i being fair? Is this a good way of thinking? Am i doing the right thing? Should i forgive her and try to work things out? Should i continue on not talking to her? I expect her to try to reach me soon... Help! Link to post Share on other sites
KBarletta Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 Hello, my fiance broke up with me 6 months ago after 4 years of relationship. After our break-up she started talking to a guy after a short period of time and after a couple of weeks from our break-up she told me she wanted to start a relationship with that guy, they even dated and even kissed. But she found out that guy was a liar and he had already a girlfriend. After our break-up I told her that if she was going to be with another man I will never be able to love her again and we wouldn't have any future together. Knowing that we would have no future together if she will be with someone else she decided she wanted to start a relationship with that guy, didn't work out between them. After that experience with this guy she started contacting me almost on a daily basis, everytime with a different reason, that kept going for couple of months until 13 Feb where i invited her out and after the date I told her that we have no future and there is no reason for us to be friends so I removed her from Facebook and deleted her number and we haven't talked ever since. It's a month now since we last saw each other and now i'm thinking, am i being absurd? I mean, it's normal to want to be with someone else after our failed relationship, but we loved each other (so we said), but after i found out she had interest in another man, i can't forgive her for that, i won't be able to tell her "i love you" ever again. Am i being fair? Is this a good way of thinking? Am i doing the right thing? Should i forgive her and try to work things out? Should i continue on not talking to her? I expect her to try to reach me soon... Help! Not absurd, no. She treated you like a backup plan, and nobody deserves that kind of treatment. That said, to absolutely swear off any chance seems a little over the top if she genuinely thinks she made a mistake and you genuinely want her back. If it was me, it would take a lot of work on her part before I considered allowing her back in my life, and probably some joint counseling first. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SoThatHappened Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 You willing to get back with a girl who thinks it's okay to bang someone on the side while she's engaged to you? That's what she was doing. She didn't start dating him after your breakup. It was happening while you two were together. If you're okay being Plan-B to your fiance, by all means, take that plunge. OR, cut that cheating wh*re out of your life and find someone who won't do that to you. The trust is gone. The time, effort, and energy trying to get that back is huge. I'm all for second-chances, but only when cheating isn't involved. That's just me. And, no, you're not being absurd. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sandylee1 Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 No you are not being absurd. You're being sensible. Why would you want to be with someone who treats you that way. She'll only do it again. Be glad you weren't married. Link to post Share on other sites
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