Poppy47 Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 Unfortunately, since you added to your old thread, people are going to respond to your first post on this thread without reading your update where you say the MM moved back home. Going back is really common so be glad that you weren't still stuck in the affair when that happened. It's also good that you have lost hope because hope would just keep you stuck and waiting to hear from him. Now you know that he isn't available and most likely never will be, you can leave him in the past and start living for the present. Now you understand. I didn't read where he had moved back. Poppy. Link to post Share on other sites
lemondrop21 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 So sorry you are going through this OP, it all sounds excruciating. I am angry on your behalf that he gave you that glimmer of hope by sending you a text. Reminds me of when my MM sent me a text after 5 weeks of NC saying I was constantly on his mind. Of course he was in no way ready to leave his W. In both your case and mine they just wanted reassurance that we were still options. Ultimately we were not the options they chose. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lydiarenee Posted October 13, 2015 Author Share Posted October 13, 2015 Wow. I will never understand people. I can't imagine what he was thinking by moving out, and then texting you that message months later, and then going back to his marriage. Men are simply the worst for being able to walk away from a relationship. We're seeing, yet again, a glaring example of this. For your sake, I'm glad you never had a full-blown affair with him but I know you were still emotionally involved and this must hurt. What a huge disappointment. The dynamics of his marriage are unlikely to change and he may, once and for all, give up and leave for good. But I wouldn't hold my breath. I'm really sorry. I thought the two of you had a shot at being together. Thanks for your response. I actually thought that maybe we had a shot too. So two days ago I was grocery shopping and I look up and there he is stopped in front of me. He smiles and says hi...I gave kind of an "eyebrows up" no teeth smile and left quickly. But even like that...wouldn't you think if he would have seen me he would have bolted the other way? Especially if he is working on his marriage. I'm sure he has to go home and tell his wife each time he may run into me. Needless to say I felt good about myself (but in all honesty..it made me miss him terribly) Link to post Share on other sites
Author lydiarenee Posted October 13, 2015 Author Share Posted October 13, 2015 So sorry you are going through this OP, it all sounds excruciating. I am angry on your behalf that he gave you that glimmer of hope by sending you a text. Reminds me of when my MM sent me a text after 5 weeks of NC saying I was constantly on his mind. Of course he was in no way ready to leave his W. In both your case and mine they just wanted reassurance that we were still options. Ultimately we were not the options they chose. Thank you for your response. It made me feel good. You're right, It is literally excruciating. I would rather lose a limb. What is your situation like today? Is he still working on it with his wife? Link to post Share on other sites
ChancesAre24 Posted October 14, 2015 Share Posted October 14, 2015 Thanks for your response. I actually thought that maybe we had a shot too. So two days ago I was grocery shopping and I look up and there he is stopped in front of me. He smiles and says hi...I gave kind of an "eyebrows up" no teeth smile and left quickly. But even like that...wouldn't you think if he would have seen me he would have bolted the other way? Especially if he is working on his marriage. I'm sure he has to go home and tell his wife each time he may run into me. Needless to say I felt good about myself (but in all honesty..it made me miss him terribly) The truth is I feel like men need a crutch to get out of one relationship and into another. Women can leave a relationship and face the fear that comes with that but men in my experience cannot. Maybe he does miss you and want you back but he also doesn't want to leave his family. Sometimes that just trumps everything for them. It would be admirable except I don't feel it is always the most honest. If someone honestly isn't happy in that life they are probably not spreading happiness either. Link to post Share on other sites
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