So...if given the opportunity anyone is likely to cheat?

[Bobbi7]

And there is no such thing as "soulmates" or true love. Sure, in the beginning it seems like it, then after several years of being together, do things get boring, routine, etc, etc. Then there is no surprise that a innocent conversation with the opposite sex can lead to cheating? Is this how it works?

[elliecoffee]

I think it depends on the person...

I do not know why people cheat or why do they feel they cannot be honest with their feelings.

 

I have never cheated, I don't like lying or playing with feelings. Sucks when you're cheated on, sucks to know you can hurt somebody... And I also believe you can find a great companion and a great friend at the same time. I do honestly believe cheating is not a rule.

 

Hope you're well.

xx

[smackie9]

People cheat for different reasons, but no not everyone will cheat if they found themselves attracted to someone.

 

All through life, you will meet those who you will find attractive, even sweep you off your feet. Most know it for what it is and that is just a crush and never act upon it. Passion is short lived and will leave you empty. The majority of us who have been with their SO for many years know they have it good, because it's so hard to find someone that is solid, willing to stand by you, and love you for who you are. Being single sucks, and dating sucks, the boards are filled with threads of issues. I feel truly blessed that I have my husband that loves me for me and I love him for him, and how we are together and take care of each other.

[smackie9]

And there is no such thing as "soulmates" or true love. Sure, in the beginning it seems like it, then after several years of being together, do things get boring, routine, etc, etc. Then there is no surprise that a innocent conversation with the opposite sex can lead to cheating? Is this how it works?

 

Cheating is for those who are looking for a temporary fix to have emotional or sexual fulfillment OR they are too much of a coward to leave the relationship, or try to fix the issues.

[darkmoon]

cheating = lying

[persevere]

cheating = lying

Good point. If someone is lying to you, expect them to cheat as well. The problem is, some are very good at lying, as well as cheating and covering their tracks. Sometimes we are left with going with our intuition.

[Friskyone4u]

Bobbi

The person who can figure out who will cheat and who will not will be an instant billionaire. There are a ton of variables that go into that decision.

That being said, everyone has the opportunity to cheat . Unless you lock yourself in the house you are going to at some point in some situation interact with some people of the opposite sex that you are attracted to , sometimes quickly. And that will happen whether or not you are married, single, or divorced.

Just as there are some people with a weight problem that just can't resist the ice cream, there are always going to be those that can't resist the temptation.

There are tons of books out on how people can REDUCE the odds of themselves of their spouses cheating, and a lot of it involves doing things to avoid situations where the opportunity becomes a lot easier.

But the bottom line is there is no way to predict unless you have history of s certwin behavior

[PegNosePete]

What a ridiculous statement. Everyone has the opportunity to cheat, if they want to. Yet there are millions and millions of people who choose not to because they are decent, honest people.

[kendahke]

And there is no such thing as "soulmates" or true love.

 

I agree with the former and disagree with the latter.

 

Sure, in the beginning it seems like it, then after several years of being together, do things get boring, routine, etc, etc. Then there is no surprise that a innocent conversation with the opposite sex can lead to cheating? Is this how it works?

 

No.

 

Intent is formed first to OK cheating.

 

Innocent conversations happen between men and women every day of every year. What turns them from innocent conversations into EA's/PA's is the forming of intent to pursue a deeper intimacy in spite of the relationship one or both are currently in.

 

A person who has absolutely no intention of cheating cannot be brought to cheating. Things may be boring, routine, etc., etc., but they are not interested in debasing their partner in such a manner. And things don't have to be boring or routine for cheating to take place. I'm living proof of that.

 

My ex and I had just embarked upon what I thought at the time was the most fulfilling, exciting, emotionally and sexually marvelous time in our 13 year relationship--and he would say the same thing, too. We were closer than I'd ever thought possible, but that didn't stop him from taking what we'd discovered and go try it out on a woman who made more money than me and wanted him to leave me and be her companion. The funny thing is that she is a cold fish in bed and now that she has him, she isn't interested in the sexual aspect of the relationship. She just wanted to say "I got a man" and he would do. Now he has to sleep in that bed he made because I don't ever want him back--and if I crooked my finger at him, he'd come running.

 

So don't be fooled by thinking cheating only occurs when sex/emotion gets boring and routine. No it doesn't. Plenty of women will tell you that the sex got really, really good right before they discovered they were being cheated on.

[SycamoreCircle]

Is anyone likely to cheat? No. Are there no such things as soul mates or true love? No, there are not. Do things get boring, routine after years of being together? Yes. No surprise that an innocent conversation turns to cheating? No, there is surprise.

 

Maturity is the polar opposite of cheating.

[carhill]

Couple things:

 

1. Everyone doesn't put sex and love and 'you and me forever' type soulmate bonding into the same box. For some, the aspects of human relations are partially or completely discreet.

 

2. I've seen both sides and personally feel it's variable, by person, circumstances and life experience, hence the 'if given the opportunity' part can have various results between persons or within one person at different times in their life and/or with different circumstances surrounding that opportunity.

 

What remains is choice. We all have choices.

[No Limit]

It appears the majority of people work this way, yes. A coin flip has higher chances of you winning than looking for an ideal, faithful partner. But not everyone, definitely not everyone. You just need to weed out the bad seeds.