Does anyone else feel we were lied to?

[NGC1300]

It just seem like growing up as a child we were conditioned to believe women were affectionate, caring, and empathic little princesses. Then you grow up and learn they are nothing like that.

 

Honestly, I'm not trying to bash women. Maybe they are just like men, except most of them can't physically beat the crap out of you.

 

I just don't think male and female mannerisms are all that different.

[Auspecial]

Well, we are both human being animals. But I do believe we are, for the most part, hardwired differently. Females will always be more nurturing and relationship oriented, and men will always be more aggressive and self-oriented.

[autumnnight]

Thank you for the compliment. I feel extremely affectionate now.

[ThaWholigan]

Psshh, dunno about you, but I was never lied to. I got told by mum from early - sometimes people suck, men and women. (not in those words, I'm paraphrasing).

[carhill]

IMO, wise fathers socialized their boys with balanced knowledge and perspective regarding women. A good mother as a role model is a healthy thing for a boy to have but there should also be balance because women in general don't love men the way a mother shows love for a son. The example is too narrow, whereas a father has interacted with many women, loved some, lost some, met some good ones and not so good ones and has life experience to offer.

 

In retrospect, either the war and his wife's abandonment shell-shocked my dad or he simply wasn't an aggressive male who wanted to his son to see all sides of women, not just the one his mother presented. In any event, the result was I gave women way too much benefit of the doubt, to my own detriment. Since we're all imperfect, if that was one of my dad's imperfections, OK, he didn't have many. Overall, a good role model.

[2.50 a gallon]

I never heard anything about them being princesses.

 

I am retired, i. e. nearly a half a century of dealing with adult women not of my family. Other than a few exceptions, I have found them to be affectionate, caring, loving, giving etc.

 

My lady works 5 days a week, almost every evening when she comes home, I am greeted with a smile, kisses and hugs and then she throws a load of laundry in the washer. My clothes are included, she never fails to neatly folds them and put them away.

 

I do my best to keep the house clean, sweeping, cleaning the cat boxes, stove tops, sinks, on her days off, she is cleaning the refrigerator, washing walls, cleaning the cabinets, etc. and always in these skin tight leotards that shows off her best parts, just because she knows I like to look and touch.

 

A month ago we had a plumbing problem, over $100, she paid, last week the screen door needed fixed $50, I paid.

 

Kisses and hugs, when we get up, when she goes to work, when she comes home and when we go to bed. Plus when ever either of us are near each other and get in the mood.

 

She in not unlike most women that I have had relationships with.

[NGC1300]

I never heard anything about them being princesses.

 

I am retired, i. e. nearly a half a century of dealing with adult women not of my family. Other than a few exceptions, I have found them to be affectionate, caring, loving, giving etc.

 

My lady works 5 days a week, almost every evening when she comes home, I am greeted with a smile, kisses and hugs and then she throws a load of laundry in the washer. My clothes are included, she never fails to neatly folds them and put them away.

 

I do my best to keep the house clean, sweeping, cleaning the cat boxes, stove tops, sinks, on her days off, she is cleaning the refrigerator, washing walls, cleaning the cabinets, etc. and always in these skin tight leotards that shows off her best parts, just because she knows I like to look and touch.

 

A month ago we had a plumbing problem, over $100, she paid, last week the screen door needed fixed $50, I paid.

 

Kisses and hugs, when we get up, when she goes to work, when she comes home and when we go to bed. Plus when ever either of us are near each other and get in the mood.

 

She in not unlike most women that I have had relationships with.

 

 

See you suffer from the double-spacing paragraphs as well.

 

 

Is this an IE thing?

[MidwestUSA]

See you suffer from the double-spacing paragraphs as well.

 

 

Is this an IE thing?

 

I don't know, but I get rid of it by previewing my post, and taking out the extra spaces.

[Mangina]

I think they are that way to their loved ones not to others.

[GemmaUK]

I never heard anything about them being princesses.

 

I am retired, i. e. nearly a half a century of dealing with adult women not of my family. Other than a few exceptions, I have found them to be affectionate, caring, loving, giving etc.

 

My lady works 5 days a week, almost every evening when she comes home, I am greeted with a smile, kisses and hugs and then she throws a load of laundry in the washer. My clothes are included, she never fails to neatly folds them and put them away.

 

I do my best to keep the house clean, sweeping, cleaning the cat boxes, stove tops, sinks, on her days off, she is cleaning the refrigerator, washing walls, cleaning the cabinets, etc. and always in these skin tight leotards that shows off her best parts, just because she knows I like to look and touch.

 

A month ago we had a plumbing problem, over $100, she paid, last week the screen door needed fixed $50, I paid.

 

Kisses and hugs, when we get up, when she goes to work, when she comes home and when we go to bed. Plus when ever either of us are near each other and get in the mood.

 

She in not unlike most women that I have had relationships with.

 

To me that is teamwork and life as it should be.

 

 

Sounds like a good strong RS to me!

 

 

Also, that isn't double spacing for me. It's single spacing and breaks up the text so it's easier to read.

 

 

 

 

This ^^^ is a double space.

[toolforgrowth]

It just seem like growing up as a child we were conditioned to believe women were affectionate, caring, and empathic little princesses. Then you grow up and learn they are nothing like that.

 

Honestly, I'm not trying to bash women. Maybe they are just like men, except most of them can't physically beat the crap out of you.

 

I just don't think male and female mannerisms are all that different.

 

Part of it is our fault as men. We have moved away from what makes us men: controlling the course of our lives.

 

Women have become the dominant gender in most relationships, which has turned men into pathetic little wussies. We need to reclaim our masculinity by resuming control over our own destinies.

 

Women care about men they respect. Therefore, men need to demonstrate respectable behavior. And there is nothing respectable about a pushover, doormat, or weak man who chooses to give up control.

 

Women like men who lead. That doesn't mean to be a chauvinistic pig. But he does need to show strength of character and resolve.

[Anela]

It just seem like growing up as a child we were conditioned to believe women were affectionate, caring, and empathic little princesses. Then you grow up and learn they are nothing like that.

 

Honestly, I'm not trying to bash women. Maybe they are just like men, except most of them can't physically beat the crap out of you.

 

I just don't think male and female mannerisms are all that different.

 

There are men right here on this board, who are caring and affectionate - to a point, anyway. Women, too (a lot of them).

 

I experienced violence early on, and witnessed a lot of bad behaviour from men, so maybe I was lied to in a different sense: it left me wary of them. I knew a few sweet boys, but I wondered how long that would last, given the way adults acted once they were in relationships.

 

My Dad is the best man I know, and thankfully, I've been around him again, for the past twenty-five years. He's caring, affectionate, adores his wife and family. He and my mother, take care of each other. They always have.

[preraph]

We do all grow up with fairytales that simply aren't true. And now it's videogames but it's the same thing, save the princess. We were all sold a bill of goods and as you can see by the new Cinderella movie, it never ends. A whole new generation of young ladies looking for their perfect prince who doesn't exist and young men looking to sweep their princess off her feet and be rewarded with sweetness and supplication to infinity. Meanwhile, who's going to mop the kitchen?

[Woggle]

I saw the darkside of life at a very young age. It is a double sword because it taught me how to be smart and not get taken advantage of but it also robbed me of an innocence I lost way too early. After growing up with my mother and then living on the streets for most my teenage years I was never under any illusion that women were innocent angels. I saw a lot of dirty, shady and heartless women but I also saw men who were the same way. I also know a lot of caring women who are genuinely good people and I know men who are like that as well. Not enough people like that in the world of either gender but I treasure the ones I have gotten to know.

 

Over the years I learned that you shouldn't judge a person's character based on their gender or their race or nationality or whatever. It does bother me though how sometimes in society we see gender in terms of women as victim and men as victimizer.

[TheGuard13]

The company line society feeds us about a great many things is less than truthful.

[autumnnight]

I saw marriage as an intimate, equal, loving, team-oriented partnership with hard work, compromise, romance, and a bit of fun. I grew up seeing a man and woman who valued each other, respected each other, loved each other, and flirted with each other (still do). I grew up believing marriage was a partnership of two people who love and respect and desire each other, with common goals, who are committed and work hard ,and raise a family, and remain in love.

 

That is not the marriage I "got." That is certainly not what my ex grew up with.

 

Did my parents lie to me? Did his parents lie to him? Or were our expreiences and personalities and needs just vastly different?

 

Am I going to respond to this disparity by growing, or by becoming bitter and blaming others for my inability to move on and progress?

[NJ123]

It just seem like growing up as a child we were conditioned to believe women were affectionate, caring, and empathic little princesses. Then you grow up and learn they are nothing like that.

 

Honestly, I'm not trying to bash women. Maybe they are just like men, except most of them can't physically beat the crap out of you.

 

I just don't think male and female mannerisms are all that different.

 

I think a lot of it has to do with the world we live in today changing how a lot of women are. Social media has really ****ed up a lot of relationships & the way women & men act. It's 10x harder now to have a good relationship than even 10-15 years ago. I've already given up on ever finding anyone personally. Not because I hate women, but because I have too many things going against me as well as the fact as it's too hard to meet anyone these days.

[toolforgrowth]

I saw marriage as an intimate, equal, loving, team-oriented partnership with hard work, compromise, romance, and a bit of fun. I grew up seeing a man and woman who valued each other, respected each other, loved each other, and flirted with each other (still do). I grew up believing marriage was a partnership of two people who love and respect and desire each other, with common goals, who are committed and work hard ,and raise a family, and remain in love.

 

That is not the marriage I "got." That is certainly not what my ex grew up with.

 

Did my parents lie to me? Did his parents lie to him? Or were our expreiences and personalities and needs just vastly different?

 

Am I going to respond to this disparity by growing, or by becoming bitter and blaming others for my inability to move on and progress?

 

I wouldn't say you were "lied" to. But I'm willing to bet that you were probably a little surprised that your ex h wasn't very interested in sex. The social myth been that all men have high sex drives and are horny pretty much all the time. And while that may be generally true, it's not always true.

 

Fully agreed with you on the growing and move on part. Complaining about it does no good. Making life changes in response to it does.

[autumnnight]

And you know what else? Most men DO have sex drives. Think how dad it would be if I had chosen to judge all men by one and "spread the misery" about my terrible lot in life.

[MGX]

We do all grow up with fairytales that simply aren't true. And now it's videogames but it's the same thing, save the princess. We were all sold a bill of goods and as you can see by the new Cinderella movie, it never ends. A whole new generation of young ladies looking for their perfect prince who doesn't exist and young men looking to sweep their princess off her feet and be rewarded with sweetness and supplication to infinity. Meanwhile, who's going to mop the kitchen?

 

Sorry MGX, but your princess is in another castle!

 

Damn that Bowser!

[johan]

It just seem like growing up as a child we were conditioned to believe women were affectionate, caring, and empathic little princesses. Then you grow up and learn they are nothing like that.

 

Honestly, I'm not trying to bash women. Maybe they are just like men, except most of them can't physically beat the crap out of you.

 

I just don't think male and female mannerisms are all that different.

 

When you grew up, were there not women around? I find it hard to believe that 1) you grew up only around men who told you these things, and you even went to all-male schools where the other guys were telling you these "lies", or 2) you grew up around women who were acting like sweet princesses all the time and never let their true colors show.

 

For my part, I grew up having quite a bit of exposure to women. It was never a surprise to find out they act like humans and not like cartoon characters.

[SolG]

We do all grow up with fairytales that simply aren't true. And now it's videogames but it's the same thing, save the princess. We were all sold a bill of goods and as you can see by the new Cinderella movie, it never ends. A whole new generation of young ladies looking for their perfect prince who doesn't exist and young men looking to sweep their princess off her feet and be rewarded with sweetness and supplication to infinity. Meanwhile, who's going to mop the kitchen?

 

I don't think we're lied to. But as peraph writes, there are a lot of socialisation mechanisms out there selling cliched messages (girls are princesses, boys are strong, you MUST get married, etc, etc, etc) that are essentially full of bull****. Disney has been a horrible offender IMO; but not the only or necessarily the worst.

Edited March 14, 2015 by SolG
Typos

[MGX]

When you grew up, were there not women around? I find it hard to believe that 1) you grew up only around men who told you these things, and you even went to all-male schools where the other guys were telling you these "lies", or 2) you grew up around women who were acting like sweet princesses all the time and never let their true colors show.

 

For my part, I grew up having quite a bit of exposure to women. It was never a surprise to find out they act like humans and not like cartoon characters.

 

I agree. Most girls I knew never acted gentle, warm, sweet or caring in high school, college or even now in the "real world". But there were some that are that way...

[MGX]

I don't think we're lied to. But as peraph writes, there are a lot of socialisation mechanisms out there selling cliched messages (girls are princesses, boys are strong, you MUST get married, etc, etc, etc) that are essentially full of bull****. Disney has been a horrible offender IMO; but not the only or necessarily the worst.

 

Graduate from college and your degree will enable you to easily get a job and be successful, while people who flunked out of high school amount to nothing...

[Camaro Guy]

I never really had too much exposure to girls because after middle school I went straight to an all-guys high school and I never got invited to parties or anything. I consider myself developmentally challenged and behind because of it. In college, this made socializing with women an absolute pain as I was scared to death of them for no logical reason. I didn't know the first steps to how to get into a relationship or sex. I thought these things just grew on trees, I didn't know there had to be intention behind them. It wasn't until my senior year that I did better.

 

At 24, I'm still a virgin but I've gotten a lot better. I just had a lot of preconceived notions about women which were gotten from places like "game" sites.