I have never understood the appeal of alcohol.

[E-Squared]

Why is there a social stigma in NOT drinking? I remember having been given some flack by people because I refuse drinks of alcohol when I am at parties. I have sipped a few things in some recent memory, but the last time I had any sort of full-on drink was when I took a few shots of tequila at a party, and this was four years ago. Before that, I had drank some hard lemonade when I camped and that was about seven months before.

 

My times when I drank are so few far in between and I can count the occasions on one hand. Also, all of the times I drank were because I was coaxed into doing it. Some people swore that I would want to drink and gave me the whole "Say that now, but you'll want to" trip. I told them that I wouldn't and it took me several times of my argument for them to finally get it.

 

One thing that I will say now is that on my 21st birthday, I went to go gamble at a 21-and-over casino and see "Superbad." My sister offered to buy me a drink and I turned it down. Not everyone gets wasted on their 21st birthday like how society perceives it.

 

At least my liver is fully intact. So I never truly understood why people look down on those who choose not to drink alcohol.

[xpaperxcutx]

Stick by your convictions.

 

I don't drink either, and if someone can't respect my decision, the issue is on them, not me.

 

 

I don't drink for health and religious reasons. I guess everyone gets peer pressured at one point and they all succumb to it. You refusing them is a type of rejection and makes you stand out from the pack. Next time if someone insists, just give them a reason to shut up.

[carhill]

Why is there a social stigma in NOT drinking?

 

IME, it depends on the crowd. I didn't start drinking until I got married and that was around age 40 and never felt out of sorts in the social groups I hung out with in the decades prior, most members whom did drink social (not to excess). Yeah, there were a few who'd get plowed but that still didn't reflect on those of us who didn't drink.

 

As an older man I can take it or leave it. IMO, the appeal is the effects on the brain, for some, mellowing them out and lowering inhibitions. For others it's what goes along with the alcohol, like with beer or wine. For others they like the mixers and the alcohol is a welcomed 'kick' to an otherwise tasty beverage.

 

If you find nothing attractive about it, it's easy to avoid. Great way to save money too.

[Noproblem]

People give you hard time if you are not like them

 

Which is really annoying!

 

 

I mean you will stay younger and healthier when you don't drink and eat junk food, but yeah, they don't care!

[somedude81]

Having a drink is just a social norm and a way to bond with the people you are with. It's a very common practice in just about every culture.

 

One thing to be aware of is that there is a difference between having a drink and getting drunk.

 

If you are at a party and somebody offers you a drink you should just accept it but take a long time to finish it.

[E-Squared]

Having a drink is just a social norm and a way to bond with the people you are with. It's a very common practice in just about every culture.

 

One thing to be aware of is that there is a difference between having a drink and getting drunk.

 

If you are at a party and somebody offers you a drink you should just accept it but take a long time to finish it.

 

Maybe, but I never really felt like having a drink. I was even offered shots and I turned them down.

 

However, some people drink and still feel the effects. I don't go to bars much, and when I do go to a bar, I am mostly there for lunch. I don't even order a beer with my meal. Plus, I don't understand why drink it if the drinks don't taste good.

[Art_Critic]

If you are at a party and somebody offers you a drink you should just accept it but take a long time to finish it.

 

When I'm at a party and someone offers me a drink I turn it down and ask for a soda, water or Coke.

Who cares what other people think about your decision to turn down a drink, if they have a problem with it then it says more about them and maybe you should pick new friends.

 

People don't drink for a myriad of reasons and nobody should feel that they should consume something they don't want to be accepted and as far as Alcohol making conversation flow... I've never had a problem and I haven't had any Alcohol in a a very long time

[Michelle ma Belle]

I'm with you OP.

 

I can't say I've ever found the "love" for alcohol and believe me, I've tried

 

I grew up in a family that is half Italian and half French where drinking is just part of our DNA and serving wine to children (usually with a splash of gingerale) was the norm.

 

When I got into high school, getting drunk every weekend by any means necessary was almost like a right of passage.

 

Today, I will admit to enjoying a glass of good red wine with dinner on occasion. Anything more than two glasses and I'm feeling it.

 

Having been around many, many, MANY drunks in my lifetime I guess I just realized how much I dislike the way alcohol changes people, especially women. There is nothing more unattractive than a sloppy drunk woman. Unattractive AND dangerous and I guess I've made a very conscious effort NOT to become one of those people...ever!

 

So I rarely drink and if I do, I know my limit and always stay within it. I couldn't give a damn what anyone thinks about it because it's a choice that feels right to ME. And if you've ever been to an Italian event, refusing anything especially alcohol is not only unheard of but dangerous!!! :D

[Jethro]

And if you've ever been to an Italian event, refusing anything especially alcohol is not only unheard of but dangerous!!! :D

 

 

To you and the OP... want a quick and easy way to deflect the pushers? Tell them you have diabetes. No one will pressure you after that, trust me.

[somedude81]

Maybe, but I never really felt like having a drink. I was even offered shots and I turned them down.

 

However, some people drink and still feel the effects. I don't go to bars much, and when I do go to a bar, I am mostly there for lunch. I don't even order a beer with my meal. Plus, I don't understand why drink it if the drinks don't taste good.

 

Doing shots is something different entirely. That's drinking to get drunk.

 

I'd suggest having one margarita or a mixed soda drink if you're at a party.

 

Have you ever had lunch at a Mexican place and had a strawberry margarita?

[somedude81]

When I'm at a party and someone offers me a drink I turn it down and ask for a soda, water or Coke.

Who cares what other people think about your decision to turn down a drink, if they have a problem with it then it says more about them and maybe you should pick new friends.

 

People don't drink for a myriad of reasons and nobody should feel that they should consume something they don't want to be accepted and as far as Alcohol making conversation flow... I've never had a problem and I haven't had any Alcohol in a a very long time

 

Why not have some vodka or rum in the soda? Unless there is a personal reason why you don't want to drink.

 

I guess it's hard for me to accept somebody not wanting to have a drink at all. Maybe it's the same thing that I feel for not wanting to do any drugs or smoke.

[carhill]

I recall interacting with my exW's new boyfriend and, in passing, suggesting having 'beers sometime'. IIRC, he responded something like 'I drink O'Douls', which I knew was essentially a non-alcoholic beer. My exW later shared that he was a recovering alcoholic who had been sober a couple decades.

 

Hence, while reasons vary markedly, that's one which indicates health and commitment and I thought he handled it really well.

Edited March 19, 2015 by carhill
Italics and 'essentially'

[E-Squared]

Doing shots is something different entirely. That's drinking to get drunk.

 

I'd suggest having one margarita or a mixed soda drink if you're at a party.

 

Have you ever had lunch at a Mexican place and had a strawberry margarita?

I have eaten lunch at Mexican places, but no, not with a strawberry margarita.

[Nikki Sahagin]

I like to have a few beers or a glass of wine now and then but I'm not a big drinker by any means. I like the taste of beer and I enjoy the effects of wine but getting drunk is a dif story; the hangover is bad, you act stupid and the night usually goes downhill.

 

It's better for you health and money wise not to drink anyway

 

It's funny how our society NEEDS alcohol to lower inhibitions. I think that says more about our culture than anything else. Most people aren't comfortable socially unless they can drink. The stigma is probably jealousy that you don't feel the need for it. I mean, imagine how many people would never be in relationships or have sex because they don't get drunk; being drunk and drinking is built around being friendly, sociable, having sex, starting rels - like people don't know how to achieve these things without alcohol.

[E-Squared]

Why not have some vodka or rum in the soda? Unless there is a personal reason why you don't want to drink.

 

I guess it's hard for me to accept somebody not wanting to have a drink at all. Maybe it's the same thing that I feel for not wanting to do any drugs or smoke.

How is it hard for you to accept it? I mean I don't see the point in snorting white powder or injecting some substance through my veins, so why should there be a point to drinking alcohol?

[Honeybunnies]

OP, I totally understand where you're coming from.

 

I have zero interest in alcohol. It's just how I am! I don't like the smell, the taste - I've tried plenty. Everyone keeps telling me, "oh you just haven't found the right drink yet! Here, try this!"

 

But everytime, I take one sip and I ask for a soda instead. My family (they do drink) often jokes that I'm like my 85-year-old grandmother who has never cared for alcohol her entire life. That'll be me one day.

 

It's even more annoying when I say to someone that I don't drink, and they ask, "Oh, are you a recovering alcoholic??" Like, what?

 

OP, just do you! I love what you did for your 21st birthday! I went to a roller rink followed by cosmic bowling for mine and had an ice cream cake - don't regret it at all!

Edited March 20, 2015 by Honeybunnies

[Penguin_hugs]

I know what you mean

 

In my family people always open the wine at family dinners etc and get a bit put out when I say no thanks. Then they try and get me to explain why I don't want it every time and it just gets a pain.

 

It's not that I don't ever drink- but I have to be in the mood and with the right people to drink. E.g. A cocktail with dinner celebrating my birthday with my closest friends is fine, but drinking with coursemates who want to get drunk after a deadline to me is hell on earth

 

Drinking tends to just make me sleepy and I hate drunk people. I also hate the thought of drinking at home. I dislike house parties and predrinking. I'd just have one in a pub with friends if I felt comfortable around them.

 

Also when I am stressed- any alcohol (even just a sip) flares up my IBS so I don't go near it. The problem is explaining that to others- when I don't want to disclose my medical condition.

 

Like a coursemate bought me a giant bottle of vodka for my birthday recently- which is odd when the only time I have had a drink in the last year was a Christmas party.

 

We have a massive deadline next week, so we have a course meal after. Loads of people keep saying we should go out and get "smashed" afterwards- but I can't imagine anything worse. I'd enjoy the meal- but they are horrible drunks- even if I was the sober one around. She keeps going on and on about how I "HAVE" to go- no matter how many times I say I don't want to and I have plans the next day. Grrr

[mea_M]

You know what, to heck what anyone else thinks about your reasons for not drinking. It's none of their business. 8 years of sobriety here and I could give a rats arse what people think. I did what was right for me. You do that too. I find I enjoy life and social interactions much more by being unaltered by the numbing affects of booze. Take care of you!

[E-Squared]

Despite having a few sips of alcohol in recent memory, I don't count those as having a drink. The only time that I was ever drink was six years ago. I was hammered alright, but I haven't been drunk since then.

 

I still remember my sister's friend giving me some look because I didn't want a drink at my sister's wedding, like she was shocked that I don't drink. Come on, look at Gene Simmons, he claims he has never been drunk before. So I don't see why being a teetotaler is such a bad thing.

[Diezel]

I have NO problem accepting the company of someone who doesn't drink. Personally, I do drink and "often", and my definition of often is that I love to try new craft beers all the time.

 

I come from a place where there was only 5 varieties of beer, so, since I moved to America, I see there are thousands.

 

Point being, I actually dated someone who didn't drink and that person would nag me all the time that I should stop and stop and stop and stop... THAT'S when I have a problem with non-drinkers, when they tell me that I shouldn't do it or remind me how bad it might be for me, etc, etc, etc...

 

Otherwise, I love having a non-drinker around, they make excellent DD's. But I've never asked someone if there was something wrong with them or if they were a recovering alcoholic... those are intrusive questions. I just accept their answer and move on. Doesn't make them any less a person because they don't drink, just the same as it doesn't make me any less a person because I do.