My dysfunctional family

[maigh]

I was an 'oops' baby and, so, my parents got married. My mother divorced my biological father when I was 5. I had no contact with him after the age of 7 by my mothers' choice, although my father didn't fight her. He had three daughters from a previous marriage. I remember them vaguely.

 

My mother remarried. She and my step-dad had a daughter when I was already in college. My mother and I were at odds by this time and I never really knew this girl, my half-sister, which I acknowledge is on me since I was grown and she was a child.

 

I have since found out that I was not my mother's first child. She gave my older half-brother up for adoption. I have just recently found out that my biological father had a son with his third wife.

 

So, to date, I have 4 half-sisters and 2 half-brothers, some of whom I spoke to last over 40+ years ago, some of whom I have never met. Both of my parents and my step-dad are dead.

 

I've recently made some changes in my life (leaving an abusive relationship) and now, I find myself on the brink of my 50's and wondering. I have so little family; we are a small clan. If I can find them, should I? Do I even want to at this point? Would they even want me to? Is it ever too late?

[CC12]

If I can find them, should I?

 

Sure. Just keep in mind that if you do find them and contact them, they might not be prepared to contact you back and may not even acknowledge you. They could have completely legitimate reasons not to, and none of them have anything to do with you personally. So don't be hurt if you never get an adequate response from them.

 

Is it ever too late?

 

It's never too late. With Facebook and social media being so common these days, people are reconnecting all the time. So I say go for it, as long as you can be okay if the response isn't great.

[Timshel]

Agree with CC12. It's never too late. Be cautiously optimistic and reach out. Let us know if you are able to make contact and good luck!

[amaysngrace]

If they haven't reached out to you by now maybe they are experiencing some of the very same feelings about it as you are.

 

Or maybe they have a bucket load of crap on their plate like poor relationships and trying to get by.

 

I'd reach out because it seems like that's what you want to do. Just don't be surprised if they're too busy trying to function to be overly interested in catching up with you.

 

Then again...it just may make their day...

 

Good luck in whatever you decide!