Sharing passwords for electronics?

[beatcuff]

My ex-wife asked me for all and every single password to all accounts including work email. She would check up on me regularly including over Find my iPhone feature to see where on the map I am <snip> That's because if there is no trust there is no relationship. <snip> share the passwords all you want. At the end of the day it doesn't really change anything but it shows that you have trust since you most likely have nothing to hide, do you?

 

second this. read these threads enough and you quickly realize 'sharing' passwords gives you nothing but a false sense of security --- exhibit A: burner phones. and seeing that you can delete messages --- you better access the phone records and email logs and... sorry i do not want to 'daddy' my wife. i'd rather spend that time enjoying my W instead of spying on her.

 

if she so chooses to cheat me knowing the passwords will only create a minor road bock.

 

i have been with mine for over 25 years. never went into her pocketbook (if she asks i bring it to her), never went into her phone, never went into facebook (i don't have one).

[atreides]

my 2 cents:

 

If you are just boyfriend/girlfriend, then hell no. To me, if this is about trust or openness then i would say not until there is "marriage" or social equivalent.

 

For me, it is pragmatic, we use each other's phones, computers and such.

 

As for business, no, there is no sharing passwords: 1. it is not our property to dictate that. For my own business as with NDAs, i retain passwords on all of that equipment only known to me.

 

Social media for us has little to do with "trust" in each other as much of our lack of trust with social media and arguments that get into our privacy vs the net and using VPNs and such.

 

Given the context of "cheating", there is no guarantees as some argued, but logistics do get more cumbersome if there are "less options" to use openly.

[xxoo]

Even our kids know our passwords to phones and computers. We're a family; we share. That's our value.

[BlackOpsZombieGirl]

A boyfriend-girlfriend relationship? NO, because absolute trust has not yet been established.

 

A long term marriage? YES, because absolute trust and desired transparency has been established and encouraged.

 

 

 

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[Brunettie]

My fiance and I know each other's phone lock passwords.

We both use his computer and both use my laptop and both use his xbox.

However, on the computer, laptop & xbox, we both have our own account with a password. We don't know each other's passwords for those.

 

I'm not sure when we started sharing phone lock passwords. I think he saw me unlock mine once (mine is the dots you connect, his is the pin number) so since he saw mine instead of me changing it, he told me his.

 

We don't abuse that knowledge. If we do go on each others phone, it's either with permission, or we go on it in front of the other person. Like if he needs to look something up and we're on the couch. My phone is on the couch and his is in the room, he'll grab mine and look it up.

[lilow]

husband always had mine because he's had to get into mail or my PC at one point or another. after a serious breach of my trust I got all his passwords too. we share a hulu account and a netflix account, also he and I have the passwords to student loan payment info, credit cards, mortgage, water bill, our internet, electric and heating, etc.

 

I may jump onto his computer to use chrome cast and find out he was looking at porn, so that might embarrass him, but that's not considered cheating in our relationship and I give him his privacy and don't talk about it. we both have private work emails which we have to keep private, if a window is open with his work email I can't look at anything - same with him if he's on my PC.

Edited April 6, 2015 by lilow

[kjohn]

My BF and I have very different stances on this issue.

 

We do know some of each other's passwords just for practical reasons as many have already mentioned. We have been together 4.5 years and have lived together for almost a year, so it comes up at some point that you need to access something or other.

 

However, here is where we differ...

 

If he were ever to come to me and say that he was feeling uneasy about something or that his curiosity was getting the better of him for some reason or another, I would happily give him whatever password he wanted so that he could see whatever it was that he felt he needed to see to ease his mind.

 

If, on the other hand, I came to him with the same concern, he would be offended that I didn't trust him.

[troubledhusband]

I may jump onto his computer to use chrome cast and find out he was looking at porn, so that might embarrass him, but that's not considered cheating in our relationship and I give him his privacy and don't talk about it.

 

Is funny that you bring that up because my ex-wife didn't like to watch porn together. I think is an insecurity where the woman might feel cheated on because the man is getting arouse at the idea of other women even duh he doesn't physically interact with them.

 

If you ask me, I think in a relationship the couple should watch porn or be open to other sexual learning material because sex with the same partener will get boring unless you learn a new technique or do something new in or out of the bed. I noticed this after only a year with the same sex partener.

 

Yes, I hope my next wife will be open to watching porn because is better than me cheating on her or her cheating on me to learn a new technique and then bring it home.

 

After she asked me for divorce, my ex went around and slept around with a bunch of guys only a week after she asked while I was living on my friend's couch. She eventually moved out and we didn't talk for few months. Three months later she came back and wanted to date me again to make sure she "didn't make a mistake". In reality she just broke up with a month old BF that I later learned she broke a condom with and took a pregnancy and STD test for (both negative thank God). She came back to me for a week and a half and she was much better in bed. You could tell she learned new things by sleeping around with so many guys in few months. I don't think she was even aware of it.

 

Anyhow, I know I'm off topic about the passwords... but I though I should share since is a bit funny but true.

[troubledhusband]

If he were ever to come to me and say that he was feeling uneasy about something or that his curiosity was getting the better of him for some reason or another, I would happily give him whatever password he wanted so that he could see whatever it was that he felt he needed to see to ease his mind.

 

If, on the other hand, I came to him with the same concern, he would be offended that I didn't trust him.

 

Careful now, a healthy relationship is based on trust and it should be equal.

Not only that, but also social status. No one should put down the other person and if so the other person should make it clear in a polity and nice way in order not to happen again.

 

I've read studies that a jealous checking up on you kinda partener normally is a cheating one or one that has other issues or other things to hide.