Do you think all girls and/or guys have the potential to cheat?

[pursuitofhappiness]

Like the title says, do you think that no matter how good a girl/guy is, no matter her history, background etc., given the right situation, do you think cheating is always a possibility?

For example, alcohol + a dashing man/beautiful woman

or a really pissed girlfriend/boyfriend

or making them wait for sex

and so on...

Also, do you think girls or guys are more likely to cheat? In my personal experience, I've been cheated on (never cheated myself) by my past girlfriends and heard of girls cheating way more than I know of any guys cheating. Now this may be because of the area I'm from or some other factors, not sure, but what is your input on this?

[lolablue17]

1. Yes!

2. guys and girls cheats equally

[No Limit]

No, I think there are some people who will stand by their values no matter what - but those come in very, very small numbers, and there are too many liars out there so I'm not exactly eager to spend at least 3 years testing each of them. I only have one life and prefer to not waste it on hate and regrets.

[minimariah]

i think Chris Rock said it well (& i agree with him) -

 

a man (& a woman) is only as faithful as his options.

[Trep]

i think Chris Rock said it well (& i agree with him) -

 

a man (& a woman) is only as faithful as his options.

 

For my first 2 years at Uni I had no shortage of options. Never once cheated (a shame the same couldn't be said about her). So that's not true.

[minimariah]

For my first 2 years at Uni I had no shortage of options. Never once cheated (a shame the same couldn't be said about her). So that's not true.

 

i love reading things like this.

kudos to you for remaining faithful and staying true & respectful to yourself.

 

sometimes, it feels like faithful & loyal people are the rarest thing in the world.

[seibert253]

1. Yes!

2. guys and girls cheats equally

 

^^^^^^

This

[Clockwork]

I'm a man, so obviously I've heard more stories told to me about other men cheating on their wives/girlfriends. So my initial reaction is that men cheat more often. Not sure if it is true though.

 

 

Other than that, no I think there are plenty of people who will turn down an opportunity to cheat. My wife has been hit on since we've been together. Most of the time with me not around. She's had opportunities and didn't fly with them. Has taken her rings off once since we've been married to clean them, that's it.

[kendahke]

Like the title says, do you think that no matter how good a girl/guy is, no matter her history, background etc., given the right situation, do you think cheating is always a possibility?

 

No. Cheating is a choice. People choose to cheat. It's not a possibility if one has no intention on cheating.

 

For example, alcohol + a dashing man/beautiful woman

or a really pissed girlfriend/boyfriend

or making them wait for sex

and so on...

 

That's called lack of self discipline and an unwillingness to dump the one making them unhappy, then being alone for an undetermined length of time until someone more to their liking comes along.

 

Also, do you think girls or guys are more likely to cheat?

 

Lack of self discipline and the unwillingness to dump the one making them unhappy then being alone for an undetermined length of time until someone more to their liking comes along are traits found in some people both sexes. Just as there are plenty of girls who do this, there are plenty of men who do this. To ignore that is to allow your bitterness to overrule your logic.

 

In my personal experience, I've been cheated on (never cheated myself) by my past girlfriends and heard of girls cheating way more than I know of any guys cheating. Now this may be because of the area I'm from or some other factors, not sure, but what is your input on this?

 

So why haven't you cheated? There is your answer.

[No Limit]

i think Chris Rock said it well (& i agree with him) -

 

a man (& a woman) is only as faithful as his options.

 

Correction; a weak-willed man or woman is only as faithful as his options.

[smackie9]

More than once we have threads posted "I have always been against cheating, I have never cheated, but I did......or I never thought I would ever cheat but I did....

 

Not every circumstance is the same. Some don't need a reason to cheat, some are taken by surprise by their actions, some don't have under lying issues, they don't have to be weakened by an abusive relationship or by alcohol, etc. Some get over whelmed by the rush of dopamine, hormones or whatever else. Never say never.

[Spectre]

No. Cheating is a choice. People choose to cheat. It's not a possibility if one has no intention on cheating.

 

To be fair from a crazy persons perspective it apparently IS possible to cheat without intending to.

[Satu]

I've never cheated and never been cheated on.

 

It isn't on my map.

[Spectre]

More than once we have threads posted "I have always been against cheating, I have never cheated, but I did......or I never thought I would ever cheat but I did....

 

Not every circumstance is the same. Some don't need a reason to cheat, some are taken by surprise by their actions, some don't have under lying issues, they don't have to be weakened by an abusive relationship or by alcohol, etc. Some get over whelmed by the rush of dopamine, hormones or whatever else. Never say never.

 

I'm totally going to never say never though. If you don't want to cheat you never cheat, period. It's easy. Sort of like...I never ever want to eat a possum steak. So what am I going to do about that? Well, never eat a steak made of possum, of course. Same deal here. If you don't want to cheat you don't cheat. Unless Professor Xavier from X-Men is involved..a person is never going to cheat unless they want to. So it's best we nip this strange line of thought in the butt right quick. The circumstances for why a person might cheat can truly vary, but it's still a choice they made.

 

It's like..have you made it through life thus far never having gone up to a baby and punched it in the face? Awesome! You can continue doing that by merely choosing to never punch a baby. You can apply that to all sorts of wonderful things in life, like cheating. If one day you decided to set all your days of not punching babies aside and punch a baby..well, you did it because you wanted to do it. You didn't accidentally do it or have a surge of dopamine that made you super into hitting babies.

Edited April 5, 2015 by Spectre

[JohnsonBaby]

Some people are more inclined to cheat than others but yeah the majority are as faithful as their options .if they know they won't get caught and find the other person attractive they ll go for it .

[Erised]

No. I don't believe most will cheat regardless of options.

 

I would be nervous if someone said most would with options, because usually when someone says that it means he/she would. People project their own motivations onto the world.

 

I would not ever cheat. I've never had slim options. Honesty is too important to me, and my own personal integrity. Who you are with no reward or supervision matters. Hurting others and lying for your own benefit is very wrong.

 

 

Men or women are equally likely to cheat. It's not gendered.

[Rejected Rosebud]

Like the title says, do you think that no matter how good a girl/guy is, no matter her history, background etc., given the right situation, do you think cheating is always a possibility?

Of course not, some people don't change their morals or values because of different situations, that said though, I know for a fact that somebody who is sure they would NEVER cheat actually might find themselves weak in a certain situation and give in to temptation. But not everybody would.

[Rejected Rosebud]

Some people are more inclined to cheat than others but yeah the majority are as faithful as their options .if they know they won't get caught and find the other person attractive they ll go for it .

I really don't believe that the majority of people are like that, some people don't even have casual sex if they're single!

[Diezel]

Yes.

 

Because the question is asking if all girls and guys have the POTENTIAL to cheat. It's not asking if they WOULD.

 

Two different questions.

[Rejected Rosebud]

Yes.

 

Because the question is asking if all girls and guys have the POTENTIAL to cheat. It's not asking if they WOULD.

 

Two different questions.

But really not everyone does have the potential because it is not part of their makeup, like not everyone has the potential to kill even in self defense or to be president or to write a book or other stuff.

[Diezel]

But really not everyone does have the potential because it is not part of their makeup, like not everyone has the potential to kill even in self defense or to be president or to write a book or other stuff.

 

You can't say it's part of their makeup.

 

We don't cheat because we are taught it is morally wrong. What do you think humanity would do if cheating WASN'T morally wrong? But then again, "cheating" wouldn't carry a negative connotation to it anymore.

 

To say that someone wouldn't cheat is to imply that it is a part of their nature. I think that's an incorrect assessment. If history has taught us anything, it's that human nature is to simply take whatever we want when we decide we are entitled to have it.

 

And yes, everyone has the potential to do all those things you listed, they simply just won't do them, aren't allowed or aren't in a position to do them.

 

Don't confuse human nature with human education or even human morality.

[carhill]

do you think that no matter how good a girl/guy is, no matter her history, background etc., given the right situation, do you think cheating is always a possibility?

Over the entirety of their life, possible? Sure. Of course opinion varies widely regarding what cheating entails and people apply their own standards and practices to their own behavior.

For example, alcohol + a dashing man/beautiful woman

or a really pissed girlfriend/boyfriend

or making them wait for sex

and so on...

Could be nothing more than an unhealthy attachment that's never acted upon but hidden from one's spouse or partner and leaks into interactions, coloring them with the relevant feelings. All unknown to anyone other than the person themselves. Is it possible that's cheating? Depends, but we can't read minds so perhaps an unsolved mystery.

Also, do you think girls or guys are more likely to cheat? In my personal experience, I've been cheated on (never cheated myself) by my past girlfriends and heard of girls cheating way more than I know of any guys cheating. Now this may be because of the area I'm from or some other factors, not sure, but what is your input on this?

Over my lifetime I've seen it to be pretty equal opportunity, with the ratios depending on demographic. As example, with a surplus of men, it's more likely the balance will tip in favor of women cheating more. If reversed, men, all else being equal. With a dearth of supply, demand outstrips it and the numbers tilt towards the gender in demand since there are necessarily fewer relationships/marriages than there is excess supply.

 

Given that cheating is the use of deception for personal gain, and a dispassionate analysis of most any human's entire life will find them to have used such behaviors to gain, anything in the realm of deception is possible, and probable for some, depending upon how engrained the psychology of 'getting away with something' rules them. Will everyone be unfaithful to a partner or spouse via deception at least once in their live. Highly improbable. Possible? Different kettle of fish.

[GorillaTheater]

Boy, have I gotten into some arguments about this.

 

Yes, I think we all have the potential to cheat, depending on the circumstances. Particularly weak mental state, intoxication, anger and resentment at our SO, a gifted "seducer". You get two or three of these in combination and you could have a perfect storm.

 

I liken it to killing someone, that other thing that our lizard brains whisper into our ears from time to time. Given the "right" set of circumstances, just about any one of us would.

 

I impose boundaries on myself because I do not 100% trust myself. 99% ? Probably, but it's that other 1% that I have to be mindful of.

[rester]

"Do you think all girls and/or guys have the potential to cheat?"

 

Short answer, no, not at all. Despite my options I have never cheated. Despite my girlfriend's options, I'm 99% certain she has never cheated. Most of my male friends have never cheated that I am aware of. Some have, but the ones that have weren't in long-term, exclusive relationships. I'd like to believe the others that I am close to would have said something if they have. I'm a safe place for secrets and most people know that. I do have a handful of acquaintances that I know cheated due to other people gossiping about it. It's none of my business but it's interesting how it gets around.

 

I still believe there is a large percentage of people that do not cheat, nor would they ever.

[Lion Heart]

Correction; a weak-willed man or woman is only as faithful as his options.

 

We could posture and argue the point of the initial thread but I've well and truly lived long enough (50yo this year) to KNOW

I'm not a cheat. I never have, never wanted to and never will.

 

It's all to do with character, wisdom ie the knowledge of the destruction to your partner which is specific to cheating, being a self assured, well balanced person who doesn't crave or need or indeed WANT the attention of others.

 

I've had OH BOY WAAAAYYY too many offers and it just does NOT interest me.

 

I've had 2 LTRs (1 M) with guys who were the MOST faithful humans I've ever met. They had good jobs and as a 2nd job went into paid stripping not to nude, for ALOT of money. Women would drip over them. They made it abundantly clear that they were with me. No one else could break that. Flattery from other women was wasted when they only wanted it from me and likewise. Because these guys were my earlier relationships (b4 30yo), and I was the same, I just gathered that most people were like us. Wrong! Urrrgh.

 

It takes a certain type of person who it just does not come into their radar at all to cheat. Rare, yeah so I realise now. Not extinct though!

 

And I think it's probably 50/50 men women cheating. But in my experience after children, it's men. But I wouldn't really have clue.

 

Look for the girl who only has eyes for you but wants to do everything else with you too. Ask about past behaviours and don't listen to excuses no matter how tempting they sound.

Good luck.

 

Lion Heart.