5121 Posted April 5, 2015 Share Posted April 5, 2015 Hi, I was in a LD relationship with my gf for 2.5 years, and 2 months ago she broke up with me which broke my heart, i had never cheated or done anything bad. I went through the healing process for 2 months but struggled, and reached out to her and she told me she regretted her decision and wanted me back. So she came to visit and we agreed to start afresh and learn from the mistakes we made in the previous relationship. That was on Thursday, and then on Friday night I went out clubbing, brought a girl back and slept with her. I think I did it because i wasn't ready to jump straight back into a relationship, and I was still hurt and angry with my gf for what she put me through. However I had agreed to give it another go with her and so I did essentially cheat. I don't want to tell her as i think i can learn from it and treat it as a mistake in a tricky time in our relationship and just make sure I never do it again, although in the back of my mind I don't know whether this signifies that I am not ready to be in the relationship and I am better off being single. I do love my girlfriend and do want to be with her, its just my mind wasn't in the right place. Any Thoughts on what I should do. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 Realize that your relationship with your GF is damaged beyond repair & end it for everybody's sake. It was already broken when you broke up. The reconciliation didn't work & this latest thing just made it worse. The girl you picked up is local. Your GF is LD; perhaps you are simply tired of the distance. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Space Ritual Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 I think I did it because i wasn't ready to jump straight back into a relationship, and I was still hurt and angry with my gf for what she put me through. However I had agreed to give it another go with her and so I did essentially cheat. I don't want to tell her as i think i can learn from it and treat it as a mistake in a tricky time in our relationship and just make sure I never do it again, although in the back of my mind I don't know whether this signifies that I am not ready to be in the relationship and I am better off being single. I do love my girlfriend and do want to be with her, its just my mind wasn't in the right place. Any Thoughts on what I should do. Yeah, Grow up. You cheated on her because you wanted to and had the opportunity to. You want to minimize your actions as a mistake. Totally immature and typical of a person who has literally no conception of what they have done. Tell her, own up to your idiocy and allow her to make her own decisions whether she wants to continue. LDR's rarely work out unless there are constant lines of communication and trust through actions. You have demonstrated neither. Please be honest with this girl and leave her be to find somebody that will treat her with the respect she deserves. Because that person is surely not you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 Don't sweep this under the rug, you need to address your actions. Everyone is right, this LDR stuff has gone on long enough and that's why it's not working out. You both need to call it quits and move on. Tip: date locally. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TexasMan68 Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 Your mind was in the right place but your dick went into the wrong place. You don't love her so please don't try and declare your love for her on here to justify what you did. In the immortal words of Jack:"Where do they teach you to talk like this? In some Panama City sailor wana hump hump bar or is this getaway day, and your last shot at his whiskey. Sell crazy someplace else, we're all stocked up here." 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 doesn't sound like YOU cheating had anything to do with HER at all. it sounds like it had to do with YOU since you are the one that cheated. and you "don't even know why" its passive-aggressive crap. you wanted to. you went to a club and picked someone up. Now you are trying to justify it. Lame. Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 Break up with your GF and move on, especially if you develope the need to take revenge on her for breaking up. Learn to let go, without behaving like a child getting a tantrum. You love your GF less than you believe. Link to post Share on other sites
Spectre Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 If you loved your girlfriend you wouldn't of cheated, so insisting that you do "love" her isn't really helping matters. It's actually quite simple for an adult not to have sex with another adult while in a relationship. When that task stops being simple it is time to break up. So bottom line is..if you loved your girlfriend I'd have no clue who you are, since you'd of never had any reason to come to a cheating forum. Link to post Share on other sites
DrReplyInRhymes Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 First, address the problem at hand, it's in your head and it's there, Don't deny the problem exists, instead, be aware. Make a promise to yourself to never let this happen again, And let the poor girl go, you don't deserve to even be her friend. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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