Didn't go to college; Where are the women?

[wick1312]

I hope the title was as self-explanatory as it can be.

I am in my twenties (yes, another one), and I chose a different path in my career. Instead of going to college I joined a bootcamp to work with Software, moved away from my city and made my name in the industry clawing my way to where I am now.

 

I will not deny that I do posses certain traits that might make it hard to find dates in the first place: I do not like pop/electro/dance music, I could give to damns about hiking or exploring nature, I enjoy geek culture, and I can be brazen at times.

 

The few dates that I do manage to get, I have no problems with. I wouldn't say I am shy at asking anyone out from my group of friends, but at this moment all of the girls of the group are married of taken. I consider myself good looking, as vain as that may sound, and I don't have any limitations to going out or alcohol.

 

The biggest problem is, Where are these women? I work in an office 9-5 and the youngest woman there is 38 with 2 kids. I go out to music concerts, sadly the bands that I go see don't attract a lot of (attractive) girls. Going out to "da club" though not my favorite solution does sometimes warrant a prize at the end, but even for that half the time I need to lower my standards as well as down a few long island ice teas.

 

I can understand not living in a big city. I can understand lowering your standards. I can understand broadening my interests, yet that has yet to yield any results.

 

Tried online dating, was an atrocious experience. Went to a singles event. I can see why they where still single. Attended a few independent classes, and yet again the age range was +15 years older than me.

 

My questions is how to find these mythical creates, the "single girls in my age range"?

Please, no comments about going back to school. I don't have the money nor the patience to start my 4 years right now.

[carhill]

Try geek conventions.... I think they call them 'cons' or something like that.

 

Although we didn't meet that way, an early topic of discussion and connection for my exW and myself was Sci-Fi. I was an old first run Star Trek fan and she used to make her own costumes for Trekker conventions (yup, still had them when we got married).

 

IMO, it's about finding a common point of interaction which speaks to each party. Go with what works for you and keep your eyes open.

 

These days, if I wanted to meet women, I'd simply take one of my vintage cars to a cruise-in or car show and see what happened. Women chat me up all the time at gas stations when in one so I simply would go with the flow. In general, women like men, all else being equal, who have interests and passions and obviously pursue them. Make that work for you.

 

Welcome to LS

[normal person]

I am in my twenties (yes, another one), and I chose a different path in my career. Instead of going to college I joined a bootcamp to work with Software, moved away from my city and made my name in the industry clawing my way to where I am now.

 

What city are you in now? What do you mean by "made my name by clawing my way to where I am now?" Where are you now in terms of your career? You make it sound like you're particularly succesful.

 

I will not deny that I do posses certain traits that might make it hard to find dates in the first place: I do not like pop/electro/dance music, I could give to damns about hiking or exploring nature, I enjoy geek culture, and I can be brazen at times.

 

I feel like "common interests" are not the great aphrodisiac people make them out to be. If you're attracted to someone and you have a connection with them, it's probably not because you both like the same DJ. Your problem isn't that you only meet girls who like hiking, it's that you don't meet many girls in general.

 

 

The biggest problem is, Where are these women?

Like most people your age, most are in college, the few who aren't are work like you. You have to accept the fact you chose the path with much fewer women in it.

 

My questions is how to find these mythical creates, the "single girls in my age range"?

Please, no comments about going back to school. I don't have the money nor the patience to start my 4 years right now.

 

They aren't mythical creatures -- they're all in school. You've got to accept that even though you didn't go to college, most girls you want to meet did. Those girls don't need to do online dating because they're surrounded by guys 24/7. So here's what you can do -- since you're still in the same age range, get your friends together on Friday night and go to whatever campus bar is the most fun. There will be plenty of girls there. Have a few drinks, enjoy yourself, and be entertaining. If you're that successful at your job already, it might be a bit of a feather in your cap as a lot of them won't be able to fathom having a career and a salary. If you want a fish, you have to go to where the fish are, even if you're not a student. They're at or around college, not in your office building. Best of luck.

[RedButton]

I had a lot of success meeting uni/college girls through online dating. Really nice girls who were very attractive too. I wouldn't write it off so fast.

 

Other than that, they're out there, although it's easy to overlook them. Sometimes they're working part time in places we frequent or doing their own thing. You might find them at the gym or indoor rock climbing etc if you're into that. If not you can always look into stuff like that for fun and see where it leads.

 

I've also had trouble finding women in everyday life. I did do a night class at uni a few years back for something I was interested in and met a few girls there (wasn't dating them, but they were single). If that's out of the question you, maybe co-workers and friends of friends? I know you mentioned that already but have you asked your friends about it? They might know someone or a few people looking but never thought to introduce you before?

[JuneJulySeptember]

Ski shops.

 

The season is almost over, but every ski shop I went into this winter had hot girls working there. Hot and young.

 

Not useful to me, but to you perhaps.

 

Hot girls like skiing apparently.

[xxoo]

You don't have to be a university student to be around university culture. Aren't any of your friends in college? If so, go to events with them. There are always cool things happening on campus.

[stillafool]

Try Church. There are lots of young women there and if they are anything like the young women who attend my church they are there looking for young men.

[d0nnivain]

Summer's coming. Are there any beaches near you? Can you hook with a group & go in on a summer share house?

[wick1312]

Wow, thank you everyone for all the replies, very much appreciated!

 

@normal person: I'm not some crazy rich hacker if I made it sound like that. Just doing pretty well for being a highschool drop out living in the Silicon Valley.

As far as the line about common interest, that is indeed something to think about. I guess i wouldn't want to date the female version of me.

 

@xxoo: That is a fair point, I still fit in fine with the college people. As for my friends, most I have left in my home town, and others (like myself) are immigrants who didn't go to college (or finished at least).

 

@carhill: Never been to one, but something to think about for maybe next year. Blizzcon has always tempted me. Also, I heard that vintage cars get chicks, didn't really believe that was true. I guess it matters who is driving said car

 

@stillafool: Alas that is not a place for me my friend.

 

@d0nnivain: We do, and I do intend to spend a good time there this year. Summer has always been kind to me.

 

Thank you for the advice!