No Limit Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 And if yes, to what degree and in what situations? What motivated me to open this thread was my visit to the swimming bath in the neighbour city. I hadn't been there since September because I moved due to college but what happened there today was just more weird than usual. I'd been swimming my rounds in the bigger pool reserved for the 'sports types' for a while when this girl and her partner showed up, barely swimming at all at first - well, until she saw me. She gave me the most hostile glance I ever received so far and then started swimming too as if trying to act athletic or something, all the while keeping an eye on me - and her BF of course. Mind you I also have a waterproof MP3 player and earphones so I barely even notice who's swimming around me, and since I don't swim for less than 45 minutes straight it does cost a lot of effort on my part and I just look forward to the 'finish' anyway. From what I've seen during my regular swimming bath visits for months it's typical behavior for people my age (teens), while the married women just look at me for a second and then mind their own business and continue chatting with their husbands. But that girl today was kinda scary. I'm just glad her BF was swimming behind her while looking after me while I went to the pool with the hot water to relax my muscles a bit, with that psycho stare she gave me I would have likely needed a water gun for my defense had she noticed. Curiously, I've never seen people acting crazy like this at the beach. So, be honest LSers - have you ever given anyone a death glare for just being within sight of your SO? Or has your SO ever been acting weird when people of the opposite gender are around? Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 No! That's crazy. I've never felt a need to show possession of someone else. Because of course, you can't possess another person. I would think her bf is either a major cheater, or she is very very insecure. Or both. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 Once in a while. I had one ex who used to date senior citizens before she met me and on rare occasion would strike up a brief conversation with some old cuck while we were out. So I'd make sure to position myself in a way that showed she was mine. Not too overtly or pushy though. I think she enjoyed that. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 So, be honest LSers - have you ever given anyone a death glare for just being within sight of your SO? Or has your SO ever been acting weird when people of the opposite gender are around? So far, no and that's three LTR's and one M. However, I've never been the jealous type. Upon reflection, that could be one aspect of any difficulties I've had with women, in that some appear to perceive jealousy as 'really caring'. Regarding GF's or wife acting weird around members of opposite gender, I don't recall that. Certainly could have happened though. I've certainly had clueless moments in life. That said, I generally didn't keep an eagle eye on a partner when socializing. I figured if they didn't want to be with me they wouldn't be and that turned out to be right! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Quiet Storm Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 My husband and I started going out in high school, and we could both get jealous sometimes. I wouldn't just stare, either, I'd run my mouth. I was 15 100 lbs and had no fear. Looking back, I'm lucky I didn't get my butt kicked. My husband was one of the biggest guys in school, so guys only stared or flirted when he wasnt around. Thankfully we both matured, and 24 years later we are married and haven't had any jealousy for many years now . 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ComingInHot Posted April 6, 2015 Share Posted April 6, 2015 I am not jealous about Other People in general but I can be jealous for my relationship. Not crazy psychoish but more like... 'claim' or in my own terms, 'mine'. Do I ever need to tell anyone that? Ah No... My guy makes sure all around knows he's Mine and I'm His. When that goes away... It means I'm Single* Note: I think it's an incredible compliment when women stare at my man. I mean, Hello?!!? He IS hot already. Who wouldn't want a second glance at that, right?!? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
cocorico Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 Nope. My partner is an adult with free will. I want him to be with me because he chooses to be, not because I keep him on a leash. I don't feel in the least threatened by women getting the hots for him, nor would I if he found a woman hot (as long as she wasn't a dog). Link to post Share on other sites
acrosstheuniverse Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 Not in the way you describe! My boyfriend is ridiculously good looking and for years I saw him around the city and thought he was hot as hell but therefore probably a bit of a prick lol, turns out he's a wonderful guy and has little idea how sexy he actually is. If a woman stares at him I don't blame her, he's gorgeous and I've joked in the past if I had met him in a bar when we were both single I'd have gone over and talked to him. He's had a crush on me for years too, and if a guy is staring at me he is flattered and likes to grab me or put his arm around me, not in a 'back off' way to the other guy cos he trusts me, more pride that I am his. He tells me every day he can't believe he gets to share his life with somebody so beautiful and if I ever mention I was hit on he will say well of course, look at you, you're gorgeous! He's very very chill, my last job was in a male prison surrounded by over a thousand inmates plus mostly male staff and he was just proud of my ability to hold myself and command respect in that situation, he worried for my safety but mostly was just go for it babe, I love you. He was at a wedding this weekend as his mum's date (I already had plans so couldn't go) and when they came back she was telling me about how the women couldn't keep their eyes off him and he had a gaggle of teen girls all drooling and I thought yep, that's my guy, I drool daily too! And if there's a beautiful girl in the vicinity I have no problem with him looking, it's natural to gravitate towards beauty. I might point a really gorgeous girl out and he will agree but say she's not a patch on me (even when it's not true haha) or he will now and then point out a guy he thinks is especially hot or has great style and doesn't get remotely threatened if I agree. Honestly I think it's really sad for someone to act like the girl in your original post. So what if her boyfriend sees a gorgeous girl? Either she's crazy jealous or he doesn't make her feel loved and desired and appreciated enough. If I can't make it to my boyfriend's band's gig and a load of beautiful girls, whether strangers or friends of his, are there, I tell him to go have fun. Same if I'm off to a show with a bunch of male friends and he can't come. We are both quite friendly outgoing flirty people (within reason!) but we trust each other and always come home to each other, and that's what matters. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Erised Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 Not especially, and when I feel jealousy, I'm good at managing it. Someone chooses to be with me or they don't, and I'm not going to waste time with mistrust. If I do find out I was lied to, I will go nuclear. It is the one thing I'm clear on starting. Never lie to me. it's the worst idea you could possibly have. I'd prefer a painful truth to a pretty lie. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author No Limit Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 Hmm, seems like LS isn't inhabited by the jealous type that much. Maybe it's just the newer generations; like I said I only see this behavior among fellow teens. I only experienced it once with a lady I'd guess to be in her late 30's/early 40's who also went there with her BF and she started "racing" against me; at first I wasn't much of a match because I'd been swimming there for some time already but after 3 rounds that lady gave up too and she and her partner went for the restaurant. But except for that one it's teens only. Once in a while. I had one ex who used to date senior citizens before she met me and on rare occasion would strike up a brief conversation with some old cuck while we were out. So I'd make sure to position myself in a way that showed she was mine. Not too overtly or pushy though. I think she enjoyed that. Positioning wouldn't bother me at all, I mean the couples in swimming baths seem to always be around each other. But looking at someone else with a gaze that could kill is just a bit over the line. I mean c'mon, I've been swimming there for probably 30 minutes already, she could have easily led her BF to the kiddy pool (she indeed did later on ) if she felt oh so threatened by someone who was busy dealing with muscle fever in her arms. Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 Nothing new to report here either. I think it's very normal and even healthy to experience a small amount of jealousy at some point in your relationship if only to keep each other on point and realize that nothing is guaranteed unless you work at it Whenever I see anyone act overtly jealous (similar to what you described), I can't help but see a very insecure person be it their relationship or with themselves. If you're secure and happy in your relationship there is no room for that kind of jealousy. It's as simple as that. Trust also plays a pretty important role when it comes to security and jealousy. If you don't or can't trust your partner for whatever reason, you're likely going to be paranoid about everything and everyone. And how exhausting is that?! I think you're right in that this seems be more the mentality and temperament of a younger generation but then again, I've seen this play out among the silver haired foxes as well Link to post Share on other sites
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