Author j_mysterio Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 So I dropped those concert tickets off last night at 9:00PM. At 11:59 I got a text from Erika (the dumper) followed by one more. Here it is. 1) "Why did you do that Jason...you know I can't even go I thought you and your sister were gonna go" 2) "Just atleast ****ing answer that Jason" I didn't respond to her. Keeping the NC going. When it comes to the tickets, my sister bailed on me last second. When it comes to her working... I didn't actually know she had to work. I thought her schedule had the day off. I'm not really looking for advice... This is just an update to the people helping me through this. Thank you guys for your time. Link to post Share on other sites
darkbloom Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 Muahahahahaha. Shoulda titled this thread "so I have her the concert tickets and all I got was a lousy breadcrumb." You are also back to day 1 of NC because you initiated contact with her indirectly by dropping off those concert tickets. She still sounds pretty pissed off at you and your best bet is to continue NC. Those concert tickets are now wasted. Should have sold them. Keep us updated as the breadcrumbs unfold. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author j_mysterio Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 This is like my little diary... But my diary has critics lol on their dark clouds of judgement casting down opinions on the oblivious, lost, and stupid. Link to post Share on other sites
Author j_mysterio Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 I hear you darkbloom. I don't feel that I'm on day 1 NC. Not at all. Its my opinion and mental stability that matters. I'm thinking clear right now. I might have a breakdown later... But I wont break NC. You know why? Cause I'm on day 6. Link to post Share on other sites
darkbloom Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 I am not judging you. Has anyone ever told you that you were cocky before? You had this great PLAN yesterday that your wise anonymous motherly and fatherly figures tried to talk you out of to save your heart. But you did it anyway and then gave your parents back talk. Grasshopper, come over to the light. We will protect you from yourself. Best leave that cocky attitude at the door though. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author j_mysterio Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 I'm not being cocky... Just confident, I don't feel I broke NC and maybe she can get someone to fill in for her. Who knows? I don't. I gave her the tickets I bought for her bday. Link to post Share on other sites
Author j_mysterio Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 You act like the plan backfired in my face. Nothing happened. She contacted me and I ignored her. Not all were saying to not give her the tickets. Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 I'm not being cocky... Just confident, I don't feel I broke NC and maybe she can get someone to fill in for her. Who knows? I don't. I gave her the tickets I bought for her bday. You definitely broke No Contact. No Contact means no contact, whether direct or indirect, of any kind. No talking, no calling, no texting, no social media snooping, and no dropping concert tickets off at her place. You broke it. No need to try to spin that at all. And the reason for breaking it is still questionable as best. That being said, just dust yourself off and don't do it again. Link to post Share on other sites
seminoles84 Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 Day one of NC. Link to post Share on other sites
dvx Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 You act like the plan backfired in my face. Nothing happened. She contacted me and I ignored her. Not all were saying to not give her the tickets. What plan? What was your plan with sending the tickets and then not answering her question? That's a pretty worthless plan I must say. Sending the tickets and then ignoring her question is just weird. You broke NC indirectly, the damage is already done, go ahead and reply something short back to her and then go back to NC. Link to post Share on other sites
Author j_mysterio Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 I'm not saying anything to her. I feel the mood dying down in this thread... Lets pick it up. I had no plan.. I had no intentions. I just used the word plan cause someone else did. Link to post Share on other sites
dvx Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 I'm not saying anything to her. I feel the mood dying down in this thread... Lets pick it up. I had no plan.. I had no intentions. I just used the word plan cause someone else did. The good news is you broke it at an early stage. I've done it and many others have. Rather brake it on day 6 then on day 30. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dvx Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 I literally feel like I'm dying on the inside. Today is day 5 NC... I'm resisting all urges to call/text her. I'm a 26 year old guy being torn down by a 5 foot tall 24 year old girl. She loved so hard and I took advantage of it. Now I'm paying for that. I cant help but wonder if shes hurting as bad as me... I know I'm supposed to be getting better... but that feels impossible without her. I hope this isnt easy for her. I hope she contacts me sometime soon... even if its a "whats up"... just so I know shes thinking of me.... I have 2 tickets to a show to see Secondhand Serenade tomorrow I bought for her birthday which is the 9th. I feel sick and hurt. Someone help me. I feel you on this one, mine left me for the similar reasons, she showed more then me, I started to control and and take her for granted. Im on day 17. The first 2 weeks were the hardest, i broke NC several times and had to start all over. There is not a single second that goes by without me thinking "is she missing me" , "what is she doing", "will she ever reach out" etc. Anyways, begging and contacting doesn't help i've tried. NC is the only smallest possibility that she will one day miss me and contact me back. Link to post Share on other sites
Riptide91 Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 Do you feel better about dropping the tickets off? If so then you did the right thing. You need to do what makes you think you can get over this faster, I know one of my turning points was finally giving my ex's stuff back. After I did that I sent one last text and went full NC. I agree you are on day 1 NC now but let's make this one count. Delete, block, ignore from now on man. This is where your future starts, give some effort to it or I'll be replying to your posts months from now about how you accidentally text her back or looked at her social media. Don't do that to yourself, today is the start of the rest of your life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dyna85 Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 Sounds like day 0 of NC to me... am I missing something? Link to post Share on other sites
ZiggyZoo Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 I'm with Riptide91, if it gets the urge out of your system so you can move on, then it wasn't all bad. I think it maybe wasn't the best idea for your sake, because what any sort of contact like this does is just get you all anxious and worked up about them possibly responding, which is hell. Even if you didn't do it to elicit a response out of her (and FWIW, I believe you didn't) being all on edge maaaaaybe expecting to hear from the ex sets you back. However, I waited until I was about a month and a half into my NC to send my exs stuff back, and it was tough because I had all that time behind me, and it messed with me for a few days. So if you're going to do it, do it early and move on. And really, congratulations on 6 days of NC. Or sort of NC. I think the reason behind this sort of "contact" is what counts as breaking it or not. If you did it to just give her the tickets, then it doesn't count to me. Same with me, I didn't consider mailing my exs stuff to him as breaking NC because I didn't do it to elicit a response. Quite the opposite actually, I did it so I wouldn't be tempted to call or message about the damn things. Just move forward and keep ignoring her. Link to post Share on other sites
lolablue17 Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 Answering a substantive question about the tickets, for me it's not necessarily breaking NC, But to drop off the ticket is surly breaking NC. I say - Act naturally. Stop calculating every action you do. You work full time in this NC. How about letting it go? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author j_mysterio Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 It got rid of some of my anxiety leading her to believe I may be angry about the Break up.. Of course I am but only a natural anger is within me. Not a **** you I hate you anger. I believe it gave me peace like I said considering I never mentioned to her that I will be done contacting her... I didn't see her.. I didn't talk to her... I left them on her porch while she was away. Call it day 6, call it day 0, call it day -100. I don't care what its called. I feel better. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dyna85 Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 I think if you're going to drop off the tickets, you should have at least had the decency to answer the question. It comes across as playing games by not answering. To me, anyway. Be a mature adult or don't be in a relationship. By dropping off the tickets, you're actively starting something. By not answering her, you're proving that she's better off without you. No offense but this is how I see it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
seminoles84 Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 Agree with Dyna. Whether you intended it or not, it does come off as playing games. Might as well be an adult now and respond and then start NC. Link to post Share on other sites
Author j_mysterio Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 No offense taken Link to post Share on other sites
Author j_mysterio Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 Also, you telling me to contact her is counter productive. How would contacting her make any sense in this situation? Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 Also, you telling me to contact her is counter productive. How would contacting her make any sense in this situation? You basically played the adult version of ding-dong ditch, I think that's what she's saying. Metaphorically you rang the doorbell, she opened the door, she saw you running away. So now she's like "WTF?!" I would have just said -- "just thought you would want to use the tickets, that's all" and end it at that point. This confusion is why most people advised you to not poke the bear. That being said, it's over. You could send that response now I guess, but what's done is done. Best to just move forward. You spilled some milk -- clean it up and move forward. Link to post Share on other sites
Author j_mysterio Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 I'm still waiting on an answer. How would contacting her benefit either of us? Link to post Share on other sites
Author j_mysterio Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 And you saying "its over" is ridiculous. Link to post Share on other sites
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