Inlovewithabrit Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 So I have inputted two forums on here already, and with much gratitude with your guys replies, me and my brit bf decided to give it another shot. Well things were great for two months, then it just started feeling like he wasn't my bf anymore but that we were just great friends, we started skyping more often texting constantly. However, we stopped being intimate with each other, I would try and he was just not into it. Now he is trying to get a job now but he says its so difficult, and no place is hiring him in his small town. So he decided to try schooling. Which I fully support his decisions and told him I would wait for him and just be there for him. However my feelings were starting to feel different for him, and I feel he was only being with me to not hurt me, if that makes sense. So I asked him if everything was okay, he said yes, then I finally told him about how I was feeling and how I was feeling lonely and missed us missed the intimacy, he would just say its not you its me BS line. Then I asked him if he needed a break from us which he replied with a yes, and I was thinking I needed that two, but for possibly a couple of weeks. He then said he was thinking a couple of few months. I was shocked, to me that is like breaking up. But I said I could not do a couple of months. So I broke it off, then he said he needed me and he really loved me and he did not want to lose me. (I cannot do the friends thing either at this time) So I said you still want this relationship he said yes. Then we stopped talking for a few hours due to because I was at work. But when I got off, I asked him you sure this is what you want, because I just want you happy. Then he said maybe we should take a break, and I just said something stupid and acted childish and said fine if that's how you want it then you will never hear from me again. I regret saying that. I deleted him off of everything, facebook, kik, xbox, twitter, email, everything. I was going to do the NC. However, I was playing xbox and I was invited to a party, which he ended up being in it. It was so awkward we did not even speak to each other. I would say some stuff and he would reply but I felt he didn't deserve a response back from me. We share mutual friends so its going to be hard to be in NC with him all the time. Though was I to rash to just bounce like that? Or should I stick with the NC. I still am in love with him, and he claims that he is in love with me still, but with the no intimacy anymore with us, I feel either he is bored of me or there could be someone else which of course he denies. We broke up yesterday, the day after our 7 month anniversary. Its hard and hurtful, and im trying to stay strong. I just miss him. I miss my best friend, and bf. How does anybody deal with the heartache? I haven't even let myself cry over this. Maybe bc its still so new with the break up. Anyways thanks to you guys if you read this and for taking the time to read it. Link to post Share on other sites
OnlyHonesty Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 Have you ever met in person physically? Link to post Share on other sites
devilish innocent Posted April 7, 2015 Share Posted April 7, 2015 I read your other posts, and it doesn't sound like the relationship was going to work. You still need to connect physically for a long distance relationship to work, and you guys didn't have that. Even if he could have come down in the Fall, once a year isn't enough. Ending a seven month relationship the way you did is pretty immature. I'd send him an apology note for being so abrupt, but let him know that you've thought things over and still know you need to end it. Then I'd avoid any contact with him for a while. It's not like you work together or have kids together. You're just playing on-line games together. Surely you can find other entertainment to replace those. Link to post Share on other sites
Kitkatleen24 Posted April 8, 2015 Share Posted April 8, 2015 I'm facing exactly the same issue as you. But mine is slightly different as he Har the funds to come see me but he didn't want to anymore. He told me he needed me and loved me but then he turns cold the next moment. It's hard.. He told me he's not feeling the same but he's trying to work on it. I guess we need to both be prepared for the worst. Go cold on him, if it's meant to be, it will be. It's easier than done of course. I've stopped being needy and if he doesn't call me, then so be it. I know there's times when he missed me alot and wants to talk. He tried to break up with me as he said he dont love me anymore but he still came back. It's different though. We are more like "friends" or even worse. I often have to make the effort while he just be hot and cold. A guy who used to say that he will love me forever, changed suddenly. Nothing lasts. I'm giving it time till may (our meeting dates), if he doesn't come, I'll pull the plug. I feel miserable almost everyday. My moods depends on his moods. It's not healthy. I understand your pain OP Link to post Share on other sites
Author Inlovewithabrit Posted April 11, 2015 Author Share Posted April 11, 2015 Kitkatleen24 it is hard, me and my ex we connected it was weird even though we never met, we just did, and we skyped almost everyday, (his Idea). and we just connected, then he started work where he was only working three times a week. But I was just told from a mutual friend he broke up with me because he felt he was holding me back from something great. But then he tells me something different and is cold towards me. Im just over it. I crave to talk to him and I miss him like crazy. I even told him I would go to see him. but all he said was im sorry. it sucks, and I hate feeling like this. Its been NC for almost two days now. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted April 11, 2015 Share Posted April 11, 2015 Kitkatleen24 it is hard, me and my ex we connected it was weird even though we never met, we just did, and we skyped almost everyday, (his Idea). and we just connected, then he started work where he was only working three times a week. But I was just told from a mutual friend he broke up with me because he felt he was holding me back from something great. But then he tells me something different and is cold towards me. Im just over it. I crave to talk to him and I miss him like crazy. I even told him I would go to see him. but all he said was im sorry. it sucks, and I hate feeling like this. Its been NC for almost two days now. In the future, never consider someone a boyfriend unless and until you meet offline. I don't know why people are so willing to declare themselves boyfriend-girlfriend when all you can do is chat online. A relationship, in my mind, requires physical chemistry and the possibility to see each other in person at least somewhat regularly. At the risk of sounding harsh, I don't see how an online relationship can be satisfying. Unfortunately, you're now experiencing the cold reality of this. The bottom line is that he's not into it anymore. He's trying to tell you to move on. Listen to him. Link to post Share on other sites
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