optomistic_nonsense Posted April 8, 2015 Share Posted April 8, 2015 Hi all! So, I hesitated on posting this only because I was going through a "it's just me" thing, thinking I was over-analyzing my husband's weight loss situation, but now that family members have begun to chime in, I'm thinking it may not just "be me". Long story short, my father-in-law/husband's father passed away on January 12th from a heart attack followed by a stroke, which put him into a coma and then sadly, he passed. During some routine bloodwork while my FIL was in the coma, the doctor told us his blood was clotting way too quickly and his diabetes more or less took over, his heart was bad, etc. Although we the family knew he had been a diabetic and had high blood pressure, during that time we were just concerned with his overall well being and not his past medical history. So, my husband took his father's state of health as a warning sign to shape up, eat healthier and start exercising. I was so proud of him for wanting to better his overall diet and lifestyle. Although my husband never was at any point over weight, nor did he need to lose weight (IMO), he decided it was what he wanted to do. And so it began. The first 5-10 lbs weren't really noticeable, most likely because I am just used to seeing him every day, but after a month, the 10lbs turned into 15....and then 20....and then 25.....and then 30.....and then the 5 days of hardcore elliptical and jogging back-to-back, and here we are at the beginning of April and he looks....sickly. I continued cooking for him the way he had requested - using certain sauces, cutting out certain ingredients, etc. But now.....his eyes are sunken, roughly 80% of his muscle has completely vanished, his eating habits are beyond anything I can keep up with on a daily basis as far as what I cook for supper anymore (my son and I cannot eat the way he does anymore)....a total 180 change. But, I continued to support him and kept my thoughts to myself so as not to seem discouraging. Now as I mentioned earlier, I hesitated saying anything to him or to anyone, because I thought it was just me over-analyzing it all. It wasn't until Easter dinner at my parents that my mother pulled me aside and said "Is the husband ok? He looks malnutritioned and boney". I was almost glad she said something, because I was finally able to break and tell her I'd been feeling the same way for a while. She even made mention of her concerns to him directly at the end of our visit which surprised both me and my husband. My husband, before his father passed was approximately 175-180 lbs and is 5'11. He looked perfect to me, always did, had a wonderful tone about him and always seemed to be in good shape and never really had a *bad* diet. Now, many pounds less later........it's become worrysome. His mother made mention of his weight, along with my mother, and a few nights ago I asked him if he was feeling ok and that he looked exhausted 24/7 and he said he was just fine and feeling good. Am I nuts? I'm thinking it's just me being a total weirdo about 40-some pounds of weight loss. Maybe it's just the short amount of time in which he lost the weight. Part of me thinks he's just going out of control based on the fear factor of ending up like his dad. I dunno. Has anyone else had a spouse or very close friend go from one end of the spectrum to the other in a short period of time like this which transformed them completely? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted April 8, 2015 Share Posted April 8, 2015 Rapid weight loss is worrying. It places tremendous stress on the body. Time for professional help. First stop should be his doctor. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author optomistic_nonsense Posted April 8, 2015 Author Share Posted April 8, 2015 It it worrysome. According to my husband (I just asked him this...), he said in the past 3 months he's only lost about 25 lbs. So, I obviously over-analyzed the amount of weight he lost. I guess it's just the muscle loss that makes him look smaller than he really is. Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted April 9, 2015 Share Posted April 9, 2015 It it worrysome. According to my husband (I just asked him this...), he said in the past 3 months he's only lost about 25 lbs. So, I obviously over-analyzed the amount of weight he lost. I guess it's just the muscle loss that makes him look smaller than he really is. Muscle loss is really NOT good. Link to post Share on other sites
michellew Posted April 10, 2015 Share Posted April 10, 2015 So he weighs around 150 now? It's not underweight, but I can see how you'd be concerned. 150 and 5'11" seems pretty skinny for a male. Link to post Share on other sites
DivorcedDad123 Posted April 10, 2015 Share Posted April 10, 2015 Sounds like he's gone overboard on the cardio and needs to implement some weight training in there. Too much cardio leaves one looking like this. Look at some long distance runners. He needs to just find a happy medium or go strictly to weight training,because it doesn't seem he was very much overweight to begin with. It takes time to find what works and sometimes what we choose works too well at weight loss. Link to post Share on other sites
deathandtaxes Posted April 10, 2015 Share Posted April 10, 2015 I'm fairly slender at 6' and 170 lbs. I exercise a bit and lift and do cardio and yoga. I couldn't imagine what I would look like at 150 lbs or less. Shocking? Emaciated? Not quite Christian Bale on The Machinist? https://33.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_marczxtcsp1r3rvfao1_500.gif You're not nuts. Talk to him. Link to post Share on other sites
wb1988 Posted April 11, 2015 Share Posted April 11, 2015 Muscle loss is inevitable during serious weight loss. There are many that claim they lost no muscle, or that its possible to have no muscle loss but it's all BS. What actually happens is that they lose lots of fat as well as some muscle and then built up the muscle back later though training. Rapid weight loss might be unhealthy, but remember that it's only for a short time that will improve the long haul. Doctors aren't really concerned that much about people smoking for 30 years and killing themselves, but somehow have an issue with those that do rapid weight loss for a few months! STFU, this is why we don't have as much trust in doctors compared to what we should have. My advice is to encourage him, but make sure that he doesn't lose too quickly otherwise he will have excess skin issues. Link to post Share on other sites
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