LifeWasted Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 If you and her have had the exclusivity talk, then she should not be doing something that makes you uncomfortable. If you have not had that exclusivity talk with her then you are dead in the water. She can date others and so can you. Link to post Share on other sites
LifeWasted Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 I have some male friends and my H has some female friends. None that either of us would visit on a one to one basis. I do not believe you can't have opposite sex friends, unless of course individuals are too inherently jealous to handle it. Its all in the context. If you were my fiancee and I found out you were alone at your guy friend's house without telling me...I'd be asking for the ring back. But if that guy friend comes to dinner with us, double dates with us, hangs out at our house with me there, or goes to the movies with you and a group of others, I wouldn't mind. Its all about context and communication. I think what is happening with OP is that HE thinks they are exclusive but SHE doesn't know he feels that way or she does not agree. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted April 17, 2015 Share Posted April 17, 2015 If you're this trigger happy, then probably this social girl isn't the girl for you. But what you should do instead of having a cow is after you've calmed down, tell her you want to meet all her friends, including the guy friends. Tell her you think once you see how they interact, you won't feel as threatened by it. And then you can assess whether this is a rival posing as a friend or really just a good old friend. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted April 17, 2015 Share Posted April 17, 2015 Its all in the context............. But if that guy friend comes to dinner with us, double dates with us, hangs out at our house with me there, or goes to the movies with you and a group of others, I wouldn't mind. Its all about context and communication. I think what is happening with OP is that HE thinks they are exclusive but SHE doesn't know he feels that way or she does not agree. I have known countless men where their WW hid their affair and OM under the guise of mutual friends. Putting the BH in situations where the BH had to socialize countless times with the OM for years. Link to post Share on other sites
Spectre Posted April 17, 2015 Share Posted April 17, 2015 If you're this trigger happy, then probably this social girl isn't the girl for you. But what you should do instead of having a cow is after you've calmed down, tell her you want to meet all her friends, including the guy friends. Tell her you think once you see how they interact, you won't feel as threatened by it. And then you can assess whether this is a rival posing as a friend or really just a good old friend. She's hanging out with other dudes alone. Please don't merely chalk this up to her being a "social girl". It's disingenuous at best and at worst it's some heavy duty rug sweeping. Link to post Share on other sites
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