Guest Posted April 16, 2005 Share Posted April 16, 2005 H had an affair awhile ago. We are currently trying to work on our marriage. I still ask him a lot of questions because it is my way of healing. I am sure there are a lot of things I have not asked, and maybe I shouldn't ask. H wanted to make love but at the time I wasn't in the mood. Awhile later I brought up the OW and asked him a question. It was nothing sexually, or anything. Soon afterwards I was in the mood so we made love. After we were done he told me the first time him and the OW had sex she told him he had a "big load" What the F$#@! I asked him why he brought her up like that and he said he just thought of it because I brought the OW up earlier. I have two questions, first why would he bring something like that up? And second question, what type of woman is she to mention to a guy he has a big sperm load, especially after having sex with him for the first time? Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky Dog Posted April 17, 2005 Share Posted April 17, 2005 She probably said it to flatter him (one woman told me once the bigger the dick, the bigger the load) Anyway, as for him netioning after sex, he probalaly did just think of it because you had been discussing the OW, and being a typical insensitive ignorant male, mentioned something he shouldn't have, when he shouldn't have I think you will probably be over sensative about anything regarding the OW for a while, and you may end up evantually calling an end to any mention of her once you have all your questions answered Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
opaleye Posted April 17, 2005 Share Posted April 17, 2005 Personally I think he may have said it to hurt you. It's not the kind of thing to say to your wife after sex- it seems like he was bragging . Maybe he feels like it will make you appreciated having him more knowing how desirable another woman found him? I dunno so don't take my comments too seriously because I don't know your husband and he may have just said it cos it popped into his head. But it would concern me. Link to post Share on other sites
Ladyjane14 Posted April 17, 2005 Share Posted April 17, 2005 It could be that he's more comfortable with you again, and willing to share his random thoughts. Talking about the OW is more common AFTER the affair has resolved, so this could be an indicator that it's definately over, and that he's lost the need to keep his thoughts secret in regards to her. That would be a good thing. Link to post Share on other sites
StillHurtin Posted April 22, 2005 Share Posted April 22, 2005 Hmmm, sounds like something my own H would say and I would have no clue either why he would say something like that. It could be he is an insentive jerk also. I have some problems w/ my H bringing up the OW like that. A lot of the things he brings up like this is when he is bashing the OW. Sometimes I wonder if he says it to find out what my reaction would be. Maybe he feels comfortable talking to me about her that way. I have no clue. I don't even think he knows why he says the things he does. Link to post Share on other sites
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