am i addicted to the internet?

[computer junkie]

my boyfriend insists that i am addicted to the internet. i get up in the morning and check email and when i come home from work i check email and in the evenings i instant message with my sister and or friend in another state.

 

he wants me to lay in bed with him in the morning so we can talk and cuddle. when i wake up i do not like to go back to sleep so i get up and play on the computer.

 

he thinks that i care more about the computer and my dog then anything else in the house. this morning he stormed out of the house and is now saying that all i think about is myself.

 

i don't get it. how does that releate to me, me thinking about myself? when i am off work i am on the computer alot. he is right about that, but all he does anyway is watch t.v.

 

he says he watches t.v. cause i'm always on the computer, but he was like that long before we got the computer.

 

i do love the internet, it is a wealth of information and i could live on it if i had nothing better to do. i do understand my boyfriend but is he over acting? why should he care if he is sleeping like this morning?

 

thank you in advance.

[Tony T]

Watching television is something you can do together while the Internet is a more personal one-at-a-time thing we do alone.

 

Your relationship is in serious trouble unless BOTJ of you get off the couch and away from the TV and the Internet on a regular basis and start doing things as a couple.

 

I don't think either one of you are particularly right for blaming the other. The entire relationship is in sad shape and won't last long unless you make it a relationship again.

 

He needs to watch TV less, you need to use the computer less, and go from there. Both of you should talk about just how much is acceptable. Discuss and compromise. Nothing wrong with getting your Email in the morning and surfing the net for an hour in the evening...but if you're living with a guy and do much more than that, there's a problem.

 

If you prefer to go get your Email in the morning rather than talk and cuddle with your guy, I think you may be with the wrong guy. There a millions of women all over the world who would give their left arm to have a guy who would want to do that with them.

 

Take my word, if you don't arrive at a suitable compromise on this your relationship will soon be OVER!!!

 

Before TV and the Internet, couples actually talked to each other and discussed their future, took walks in the evening, took drives in the country, went shopping together, attended various events, went on picnics, etc.

 

And, yes, I think it is very possible to be addicted to the Internet and a lot of people are.

[computer junkie]

just to reiterate that the only i get up and check email is when he is still sleeping as was the case this morning.

 

when he is awake and i am awake then we do lay and talk, but when i can't sleep i think he wants me to just lay there until he wakes up and i just can't do that, i need to get up.

 

well thank you for answering, i know we need to "get a life" once again. it seems the only thing we do tho is go to karaoke.

 

we watch the grandson almost six evenings a week from 5-10 p.m. which makes it hard to do anything cause after that i am ready to go to bed!

 

any suggestions? what do people do to have fun besides go to bars?

Watching television is something you can do together while the Internet is a more personal one-at-a-time thing we do alone. Your relationship is in serious trouble unless BOTJ of you get off the couch and away from the TV and the Internet on a regular basis and start doing things as a couple. I don't think either one of you are particularly right for blaming the other. The entire relationship is in sad shape and won't last long unless you make it a relationship again. He needs to watch TV less, you need to use the computer less, and go from there. Both of you should talk about just how much is acceptable. Discuss and compromise. Nothing wrong with getting your Email in the morning and surfing the net for an hour in the evening...but if you're living with a guy and do much more than that, there's a problem. If you prefer to go get your Email in the morning rather than talk and cuddle with your guy, I think you may be with the wrong guy. There a millions of women all over the world who would give their left arm to have a guy who would want to do that with them. Take my word, if you don't arrive at a suitable compromise on this your relationship will soon be OVER!!! Before TV and the Internet, couples actually talked to each other and discussed their future, took walks in the evening, took drives in the country, went shopping together, attended various events, went on picnics, etc. And, yes, I think it is very possible to be addicted to the Internet and a lot of people are.

[Tony T]

Is "the grandson" you watch five nights a week YOUR grandson. What is your age? I think the age of you and your boyfriend has a lot to do with how I should answer your last question.

[computer junkie]

yes it is my grandson, and he is his grandpa but not biological but we consider ourselves a family in that way. i am 43 and he is 41.

Is "the grandson" you watch five nights a week YOUR grandson. What is your age? I think the age of you and your boyfriend has a lot to do with how I should answer your last question.

[Tony T]

I think your level of Internet use may be a little heavy...but I also think his watching TV is overboard. But that doesn't mean he will change.

 

The best thing you can do is talk this over and maybe do a little bit more together. My guess, though, is that he is set in his ways and just likes to complain. In other words, no matter what you agree on it's likely he will remain in front of the television. He is likely to complain about your use of the computer no matter how much you're on it.

 

Try to spend a bit more time with him doing things but by all means make yourself happy on the Internet as well. I think just some minor adjustments will fix this. He probably just needs a little attention once in a while.

[Laurynn]

Having to spend 6 nights a week, from 5-10pm with your grandson (babysitting).....that seems a bit much to me, considering you and your boyfriend are quite young and are obviously in a bit of a rut (between him watching a lot of tv, and you on the internet). Can't your son or daughter make other arrangements once in a while? For you and your boyfriend to only have one night a week to spend together, alone, without a child around.....that's got to be tough. Especially when you admit that by the time 10pm comes along, you're tired and ready to hit the hay. Doesn't your son or daughter realize that you and your boyfriend need some quality time together?? Sheesh.

 

laurynn