TheBarnacle Posted May 17, 2005 Share Posted May 17, 2005 Originally posted by blind_otter 1. I need to love myself enough to know if someone else really loves ME, or just the *idea* of me that they have in their head 6. It's ok to be alone. how true...and how sad i'm only now learning this. man, i must be relationship-retarded. Link to post Share on other sites
ChuckDee33 Posted May 19, 2005 Share Posted May 19, 2005 My ex and I hardly ever went a day without seeing each other in a 20 month relationship (save for a few weeks during summer or little trips). This was not healthy. You need to invest time in doing things with other people and saving time for just yourself. You need time in between to really miss each other. I think it lead me to be too dependent on her for the happiness in my life. So I'd say don't hinge your happiness in life around one person or one thing. It has made it that much harder for me since the breakup. Definately have to communicate to your partner if you feel something isn't right. Don't be afraid to open up your true feelings, even if they might sound like your being harsh. It's not being harsh it's just saying what's on your mind. In the end, this will pay off more than if you just bottle up your emotions. Don't lie. Ever. Even if you would do it just to not have to go through another arguement. Even a little white lie. It will come back to haunt you sooner or later. I never did but I guess it's obvious...don't cheat. If you feel you have to screw somebody else at least break up with your current SO first. Don't pretend everything is 'cool' in your relationship. Chances are, there are always a few issues to be worked on. Relationships are like full-time jobs and you have to put constant work into them. Or you will be hearing "You're fired" just like Donald Trump. Take things on the slower side at first with someone. Don't rush into love with lust. If you are wanting a serious LTR out of it, why not take the time to make sure you know what you're gettin into? Expect the unexpected, at all times. Nothing is certain in love and life. Don't, I repeat, DO NOT try and be friends with someone you still have any feelings for. It won't work. BIG waste of time. Instead, focus on yourself and don't talk to them. After a time, either you both will have moved on completely or someone will want to try again. By then, maybe the other person will too, maybe they won't. Link to post Share on other sites
lindya Posted May 19, 2005 Share Posted May 19, 2005 You might fail to help your own personal Tin Man (or Woman) find their heart....but if you manage to discover your own in the process, then the effort hasn't been completely wasted. Link to post Share on other sites
ErinErinErin Posted May 28, 2005 Share Posted May 28, 2005 1- I AM THE PRIZE (a good guy friend of mine told me this- He said it is the ONLY way to think!) 2- Love shouldn't hurt, leave you guessing, leave you crying on the floor. Love doesn't make you beg, love doesn't make you plead... 3- If they tell you that they never had any respect for any of their girlfriends before you (red flag!), they won't have any respect for you... Link to post Share on other sites
allinside Posted May 28, 2005 Share Posted May 28, 2005 Remember LOVE is an US and does not destroy the ME. you should ALWAYS be yourself. i know sometimes, it's hard because you really want to make that person happy. so you try and try, and then cry, because what's really going on is you are starting to NEED that person. the dynamincs change, when ppl realize they CAN walk all over you, they WILL. and i think we all know this. but its hard, heck we are all not MONKS living at the Potala but we are ALL humans and being human means being filled with perfected flaws; we can only do what we can. who out there wants their EX back? seriouasly i want mine back, cause i am truly in love. but i also know she did hurt me. the sexual passion between my ex and i are there and more steamier. the thing is we live together and has had sex after a break up! my heart was saying don't do it while i was undressing....hmm but i chose to ignore it... because i was wanting to please her, because she wanted it, even though my heart didn't, i did it! it just goes to show how weak we are when we are vulerable, and she took it as an advantage over me. so tell me who wants their ex back... i have theories, you all do, and they are all right but there's certain things that you must do. remember on thing and on thing only,....THE URGE TO MERGE! reply to me let me know if you really want your ex back!!! because if you do i sure do bet you lost yourself within the relationship, i sure do bet you gave up everything for that person, i sure do bet that you became them and forgot about you, you left your friends behind ad they told you not to move forward with it! if you can relate to any of that, i will tell you what you need to do. -thebookoflove Link to post Share on other sites
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