Breaking It Off Vent

[Anela]

 

I am not hot stuff. But i do have a few very nice features that men DON'T have to LIE ABOUT LOVING.

 

I hope they tell you things they love about your personality, too. We are more than our looks, even though it's nice to look and feel attractive.

[Rejected Rosebud]

Wow, now I am starting to feel bad, my boyfriend has never once said that I have a designer vagina!! I wonder if I need to be worried??

[Leigh 87]

Wow, now I am starting to feel bad, my boyfriend has never once said that I have a designer vagina!! I wonder if I need to be worried??

 

A man who truly cherishes a woman won't give a darn about her vagina.

 

I was one of the guys growing up cos I was too fugly.

 

I heard everything men say to their mates. About sex and stuff.

[Leigh 87]

I hope they tell you things they love about your personality, too. We are more than our looks, even though it's nice to look and feel attractive.

 

He says I'm the sweetest girl he's ever met.

 

He said he's never been so cared for or looked after

 

He thinks my kindness towards him is too good to be true

 

 

He's complimented my personality as much as he has my looks.

 

 

He told my friend that I'm such a beautiful person inside and out.

Edited April 21, 2015 by Leigh 87

[Leigh 87]

This is so hard because we are actually an intellectual match. And we make each other laugh!!!!!!

 

That's why this is so hard for us to keep away.

 

 

 

But I'm going to severe ties. Today.

 

 

 

I also have another intellectual match who cracks me up. From last year. Who I never had drama with. He doesn't drag me into his mental issues.

 

I just use him for sex and company and laughs. Since it was so drama free with him. He has the inability to feel...things. For anything in life. He has a psychiatric problem but he's totally mellow and he never once dragged me in. He is medicated and while he cannot have a relationship, he was totally drama free fun and mind blowing sex.

 

That guy is always singky. He tells all women plainly that sorry, he is getting on too of his issues and cannot have a relationship anytime soon and possibly ever. He doesn't drag women in to begin with.

 

I'll use him and let this current guy go.

[yajiuma]

It's been less than a month and there is way too much drama going on.

It really doesn't matter what he says about your personality/looks- it's not a solid foundation for a relationship(and frankly even an FWB may become messy in his situation)

 

You've just started studying at uni and working toward your future dreams. I've read how excited you were to finally get on with this stage in your life.

Don't get tangled in relationships that are not going to be 100% positive influence in your daily life or distract from your important future goals.

[ExpatInItaly]

Here's a novel idea:

 

Why not just go on a man-detox for a while? None of the guys you've described seem to be great catches at all. Why the need to have someone in your life, either as a FWB or a bf? If the choice is one of these dudes or nobody, I think "nobody" is the better option!

 

Also: designer vagina? I can't even...

 

Sad.

[Jessie1231]

Here's a novel idea:

 

 

Also: designer vagina? I can't even...

 

Sad.

 

Well nobody wants a knock-off vagina.

[katiegrl]

Leigh, just curious but do you ever sleep? Not judging, but you really do appear to be quite manic. Combined with your sexual promiscuity and delusions of grandeur, has your therapist ever recommended you see a psychiatrist?

 

I am not being flip, I am quite serious. Your behavior is indicative of someone who "may" have bipolar II.

 

((hugs))

[ufo8mycat]

I do have a very nice looking one.

 

Compared to what? It is a really odd thing to day.

 

I have never known a man to go that vaj ain't looking like top shelf, not going there.

[clia]

I don't believe these guys are lying.

 

I do have a very nice looking one.

 

I've been with a lot of men.

 

Especially the long term boyfriends!

 

I don't believe every single dude I have ever been with is a lying slime ball. My long term boyfriend last year was not a liar.

 

I actually think it's probably fairly common that when a man is in bed with a naked woman he will compliment her body. And if there is a naked vagina in front of a guy (designer or not), chances are he is going to be pretty happy about it. I'm sure the guys aren't lying, but I'm not sure why you are putting so much stock into these kinds of comments.

[GemmaUK]

I dunno guys, I would feel so rotten turning my back in a person who's in need of some tender loving care.

 

He may have legitimately just had bad luck. His brother is an ice addict after all. His parents weren't the best parents.

 

I don't know the guy. It's too early for me to... Assume he's likely a lying slime ball.

 

I want to support him. But I DO understand 100% he can't commit or be in any sort of a lasting relationship..... Due to his mental problems.

 

I find it hard to turn my back in these types of situations.

 

The difference now is unlike with my ex ex ex who's mum died and who I looked after despite the fact he wasn't into me sexually, I won't be in any sort of serious relationship with this current guy. I won't move in with him. I won't stand for it if I realise he just isn't that into me.

 

 

Did he ask you to move in with him?

[Leigh 87]

Compared to what? It is a really odd thing to day.

 

I have never known a man to go that vaj ain't looking like top shelf, not going there.

 

 

 

Cool.

 

I happened to be one of the guys growing up and I heard men talk about the vaginas of women they slept with all the time.

 

Some men do have preferences. Not all but many notice a nice vagina as women notice a big or nice looking penis.

[Leigh 87]

Leigh, just curious but do you ever sleep? Not judging, but you really do appear to be quite manic. Combined with your sexual promiscuity and delusions of grandeur, has your therapist ever recommended you see a psychiatrist?

 

I am not being flip, I am quite serious. Your behavior is indicative of someone who "may" have bipolar II.

 

((hugs))

 

I'm not promiscuous.

 

I have to have a real connection and feelings for me to have sex.

 

I had a lot of casual options with very hot dudes but I recoiled at the thought of a man touching me unless we have that right chemistry, and I have to live their scent and also feel a huge emotional and intellectual connection.

 

I could go out and shag a 9 every night if I wanted if I was promiscuous. Any average gal can go out and shag a hot guy if they are promiscuous and they readily sleep with men without being discriminatory.

 

I have to like a man enough to date and to fall in love with for me to have sex with them.

 

The fwb worked for me with the last guy cos he genuinly couldn't be with any woman but yet we had the raw ingredients for a relationship initially weren't for his illness.

[katiegrl]

I'm not promiscuous.

 

I have to have a real connection and feelings for me to have sex.

 

I had a lot of casual options with very hot dudes but I recoiled at the thought of a man touching me unless we have that right chemistry, and I have to live their scent and also feel a huge emotional and intellectual connection.

 

I could go out and shag a 9 every night if I wanted if I was promiscuous. Any average gal can go out and shag a hot guy if they are promiscuous and they readily sleep with men without being discriminatory.

 

I have to like a man enough to date and to fall in love with for me to have sex with them.

 

The fwb worked for me with the last guy cos he genuinly couldn't be with any woman but yet we had the raw ingredients for a relationship initially weren't for his illness.

 

Promiscuity as defined by Websters -- "the practice of having casual sex frequently with different partners."

 

Leigh, it doesn't matter that you have a "connection" and "feelings" for all these different guys. In fact, one could argue your tendency to "fall" so easily for so many different guys, and then proceed to have sex with them, indicates a serious problem.

 

But nevermind. Your denial and defensive posture is par for the course.

[Leigh 87]

Promiscuity as defined by Websters -- "the practice of having casual sex frequently with different partners."

 

Leigh, it doesn't matter that you have a "connection" and "feelings" for all these different guys. In fact, one could argue your tendency to "fall" so easily for so many different guys, and then proceed to have sex with them, indicates a serious problem.

 

But nevermind. Your denial and defensive posture is par for the course.

 

I do not have sex with loads of different partners.

 

I don't shun easy women but I am not one of them.

 

I do not go out to bars and club and take men home.

 

It takes true feelings and dating potential for me to have sex with a man.

 

I do not easily feel like having sex - I encounter loads of men on dates and when I am out, and this year i have had sex with two. TWO this year.

 

I have only had sex on the first date twice in 10 years of dating.

 

for 8 years I have been abstinent for four, and I dated in long term relationships for 4........

 

2 years total were spent having sex with other guys which got my numbers up.

 

The majority of my dating life has been monogamous in 3 relationships OR abstinent. Early 20s I did not have sex for FOUR YEARS. Despite having LOADS of oportunity.

 

I don't buy that I readily sleep around.

[Million.to.1]

I'm sure some of the male members here would like to hear more about your vagina.

[Leigh 87]

Promiscuity as defined by Websters -- "the practice of having casual sex frequently with different partners."

 

Leigh, it doesn't matter that you have a "connection" and "feelings" for all these different guys. In fact, one could argue your tendency to "fall" so easily for so many different guys, and then proceed to have sex with them, indicates a serious problem.

 

But nevermind. Your denial and defensive posture is par for the course.

 

I have loads of first dates and I rarely go on second.

 

I have gone in loads of dates online and real life, and most men don't get a second

 

I don't feel connections easily. Once every four or so months. Of weekly dates.

 

I've turned down many cute men who I wasn't repulsed by. And who I liked as people.

 

I have to feel the potential to be head over heels. For me to have sex.

 

If i was truly promiscuous I would me the friend who u go out with and who always goes home with a new man. Which isn't me at all.

 

Sex with two men this year is normal. Two other men wanted sex. We had first dates. They were attractive and I liked their personalities. But i need that spark for me to even kiss them.

 

I felt a true connection for two men this year. Another, I thought a felt a connection but it was soooo only sexual and his personality turned me off! So we didn't shag. Other two I did shag.

 

I would say I feel whole body, intense chemistry and spark eyes across the room sparks and chemistry, once every four months of this year is any indicator.. with a false start or two in the meanwhile ( I realise during date two that the spark was centred around friendship or pure sex.....and I don't proceed to go on a third date)

[Leigh 87]

Darn it,

 

 

There is a massive storm here near Sydney and so I cannot break it off with him. No reception his way.... My friend around the corner from him has no phone reception.......

 

After much consideration, I have realised that I want a relationship, a FWB will not cut it with him, and since he clearly cannot give me a healthy, mutually beneficial relationship I will have to cut ties..........

 

I will tell him very simply. I will do it via phone call not text.

 

A simple " sorry but I have real feelings for you and I was excited about moving in the direction of a propper relationship. You cannot offer that to me right now I need to get out now before I get hurt, months later when you are still unavailable and I will be expecting... romantic dates, future talks, and relationship stuff."

 

That is how I feel. I will just plainly say it and then go no contact.

 

We weren't even facebook friends, LOL. He said he didn't add me but had stalked my facebook wall...... he said his exes friends may stalk him and see me there, since his ex knows about me......

 

This guy is one walking red flag!

 

God help the next girl he encounters.

[BlackOpsZombieGirl]

.

 

You told Katie THIS:

 

I do not have sex with loads of different partners.

I don't shun easy women but I am not one of them.

 

I do not go out to bars and club and take men home.

 

It takes true feelings and dating potential for me to have sex with a man.

 

I do not easily feel like having sex - I encounter loads of men on dates and when I am out, and this year i have had sex with two. TWO this year.

 

I have only had sex on the first date twice in 10 years of dating.

 

for 8 years I have been abstinent for four, and I dated in long term relationships for 4........

 

2 years total were spent having sex with other guys which got my numbers up.

 

The majority of my dating life has been monogamous in 3 relationships OR abstinent. Early 20s I did not have sex for FOUR YEARS. Despite having LOADS of oportunity.

 

I don't buy that I readily sleep around.

 

 

But earlier, you said THIS:

 

 

Originally Posted by Leigh 87 View Post

I have had nearly every guy bar one, comment on how nice it looks.

I'd know, I've slept with loads of guys.

 

 

I'm not picking on you or anything...it's just that I've been noticing a LOT of inconsistencies with your postings.

 

So, which is it? Have you slept with LOADS of guys (which would be promiscuous) OR you do NOT have sex with LOADS of guys??

 

 

And um...........a "designer vagina"?? Omg. This is the first time in my LIFE that I've ever heard of a woman referring to her vagina like that - and the first time that I've ever heard a woman singing the praises of how "good" and "nice" her vagina looks! I mean, barring the obvious physical differences, sizes, shades, etc., don't most vaginas look THE SAME, more or less???

 

 

Wow. Just wow.

 

 

.

[Diezel]

I'm sure some of the male members here would like to hear more about your vagina.

 

The really desperate ones?

[Leigh 87]

.

 

You told Katie THIS:

 

 

 

 

But earlier, you said THIS:

 

 

 

 

 

I'm not picking on you or anything...it's just that I've been noticing a LOT of inconsistencies with your postings.

 

So, which is it? Have you slept with LOADS of guys (which would be promiscuous) OR you do NOT have sex with LOADS of guys??

 

 

And um...........a "designer vagina"?? Omg. This is the first time in my LIFE that I've ever heard of a woman referring to her vagina like that - and the first time that I've ever heard a woman singing the praises of how "good" and "nice" her vagina looks! I mean, barring the obvious physical differences, sizes, shades, etc., don't most vaginas look THE SAME, more or less???

 

 

Wow. Just wow.

 

 

.

 

I have honestly sat around with a bunch of average aussie dudes.

 

Not ALL vaginas are alike. I assure you.

 

Most men in love do not care. Some men prefer nicer looking ones but it is RARE that a man has a staunch preference!

 

And I have slept with a lot. BECAUSE: for 1 - 2 years of my life I slept around as a form of self harm. I sought threrapy for it in the aftermath.

 

Luckily, when I am happy I do not sleep around. Because happy Leigh 87 doesn't do that.

 

So in GENERAL no, I am NOT promiscuous - 8 years I was ABSTINENT or in LONF RELATIONSHIPS with three men.

 

For 1 - 2 years out of about TEN YEARS sexually active, I slept around a little.

 

So no, in general I do not sleep around.

[Leigh 87]

The really desperate ones?

 

 

desperate?

 

Plenty of men find me very attractive thanks. Just because I am not your type, doesn't mean most me would have to be desperate if they found me hot.

[Jessie1231]

Darn it,

 

 

There is a massive storm here near Sydney and so I cannot break it off with him. No reception his way.... My friend around the corner from him has no phone reception.......

 

After much consideration, I have realised that I want a relationship, a FWB will not cut it with him, and since he clearly cannot give me a healthy, mutually beneficial relationship I will have to cut ties..........

 

I will tell him very simply. I will do it via phone call not text.

 

A simple " sorry but I have real feelings for you and I was excited about moving in the direction of a propper relationship. You cannot offer that to me right now I need to get out now before I get hurt, months later when you are still unavailable and I will be expecting... romantic dates, future talks, and relationship stuff."

 

That is how I feel. I will just plainly say it and then go no contact.

 

We weren't even facebook friends, LOL. He said he didn't add me but had stalked my facebook wall...... he said his exes friends may stalk him and see me there, since his ex knows about me......

 

This guy is one walking red flag!

 

God help the next girl he encounters.

 

Seeing someone for a few weeks doesn't require more than a text break up, especially when the guy stopped texting or calling you anyway. But even if you feel the need to end this with him, you already did that two days ago with this guy. So there isn't anything else for you to end with him now, as it sounds like he was the one ending it to begin this entire thread.

[Els]

Leigh... I am sure you have a nice cooch, but the thing is that it's really, really, really unusual to bring stuff like that up out of the blue when you're talking about yourself.

 

Anyway, glad to hear you are going to break things off with him. I sincerely hope the resolve stays with you after the storm recedes!