Spark1111 Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 i think you are getting a first hand, in depth glimpse at HOW insecure and NEEDY cheaters are..... And TRUST me on this, so is her AP....These people attract each other like magnets. can you live with this? Because unless they go to intense IC for YEARS, it will always be about you filling this great void of need. despite what YOU need. Can you live with this? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
oldshirt Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 When I was a little kid we had a sandbox out in the back yard that I loved to play in. One day while I was playing in the sand, the cat jumped in and took a big ol' crap in the sand and buried it right before my very eyes. I never played in the sand again. It was tainted. To me it was contaminated. I knew that I could scoop out the turd and keep playing but I had the vision of the cat pooping in my sand box and I knew there was a realistic chance that the cat had pooped in it many times and that for all I new the box was just full of $h!t. This is really no different. Some dude took a big ol' crap in your wife's jay-jay. Some people are able to scoop out the turd and keep on playing. For others, their WS is now tainted and contaminated and they can never go back being attracted to or desiring them again. When someone cheats on their spouse, they run the risk that their spouse will view them as tainted, damaged goods and lose their love and desire for them. It is unrealistic for them to think that their spouse is going to just automatically accept them back into their bed and into their heart. IMHO, it was generous of you to agree to a 6 month trial period to see if you can work things out. It was worth a try but if after 6 months all you can see is cat turds in your wife's jay-jay, it's not your fault you don't find her attractive and desirable anymore. That's the risk she took when she was with another man. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
davidromero43 Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 The best way to deal with this issue. Just know every time you have sex with her, you will visualize him having sex with her. It will bring up the pain. So as humans, we tend to avoid pain. So try some new things. Try to shock yourself out of the norm. Tell her to lick your bum. Talk really nasty and spank her. Pull out and come on her face. Put a porno in the DVD. While doggy style, tell her you want to f*ck her sister, and see how long you can hold on to her hips. Try to make it fun for you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ladydesigner Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 After False R my libido died and I haven't regained it since. We still have sex but it is just that...sex. There is no intimacy or affection. I just can't go there yet and I am not sure WH is even capable of it. I cannot kiss my WH as I feel like I am kissing my brother or something. Link to post Share on other sites
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