Let's lighten it up with a fashion question!

[loveweary11]

As a nice aside from the gender wars, I have a fashion question after reading No Limit's account of her Starbuck's trip.

 

I've been struggling with my look for a while now. Because I'm in very diverse places and do very deverse things, I can't seem to come up with a fashion that works.

 

In Manhattan, I can be found at Spice Market in Meatpacking, chilling at the pool at the Gansevoort Hotel, in Lavo, etc. For those who don't know NY, you have to be pretty dressed up in these places. But I'll also go to shows at Governors Beach Club, Pacha, or to a local Irish pub or just to chill and wander the LES and East Village and Williamsburg.

 

I can NOT find clothing to fit my very diverse range of activities.

 

I feel like a dork at clubs sometimes because I'm over dressed and don't have enough candy or whatnot. I feel underdressed at Spice Market because I'm trying to look a little cool and not all stuffy.

 

I used to wear suits exclusively, but it's so damn phony I can't deal. I far prefer H&M style stuff that's tight and can show off my shape. But that stuff is kind of cheap.

 

I see more women gravitate toward the suit guys thinking they have the $$$, but i do better than most of them and have a very positive net worth with zero debt. You just can't see that from the outside oreven by hanging out with me. Like... i think nothing of dropping $500 in a night out with a girl. I've dropped in excess of 3 grand partying for the weekend with some girls. Not broke. Just don't like to be phony or have debt,

 

So how can I come across like the suit guys, but be way, way cooler than them with my style?

 

What do you suggest? I go to fancy places, to raves, to ny,to Miami, also to Maine to hike mountains and go sailing a lot and do active things.

 

Also my head is shaved. And I think I'll be keeping it that way. Waaay easier than hair.

Edited April 18, 2015 by loveweary11

[badpenny]

There's a lot to be said for wearing Monk's robes. They fit in everywhere....

 

Seriously?

Really, I'm asking...

 

My personal opinion is that frankly, worrying about clothes when fashions change quicker than a compass changes direction, is a superficial occupation.

Instead of trying to gather a wardrobe for every situation/location/occasion, do what Daniel Ratcliffe did: He bought 10 of everything and wore the same stuff everywhere.

 

Admittedly, his motive was to put off the paparazzi, because by wearing the same clothes continually, the possible scandals of his whereabouts and activities lost their shine when the photos of him lost credibility.

 

But buy clothes to reflect who you are, both superficially and as a deeper character. Clothing projects the real you.

Unless of course, you do have a multiple personality disorder and become a different person according to wherever you find yourself....

[Jessie1231]

I don't have much to offer except to say that I love shaved heads. But raves are still a thing? I mean that really still happens? I thought that went away with the 90s.

[Phoe]

I wouldn't worry about the suits. Honestly the only thing that matters to me with clothes is that they fit well and aren't shredded/dirty.

 

As long as they fit a man's body right, and are clean, I do not care in the slightest what the style actually is, as long as that style appears to be making him happy and confident in how he looks.

 

I'd recommend you look into the concept of a capsule wardrobe.

 

Allows you to build a wardrobe made of clothes that ALL go together and can be worn at any variety of events, while using the smallest amount of actual clothing items possible.

[loveweary11]

I don't have much to offer except to say that I love shaved heads. But raves are still a thing? I mean that really still happens? I thought that went away with the 90s.

 

Can be called music festivals, raving, EDM, etc... Nobody is very specific.

 

 

EDM and Hippies: How Ravers Became the New Flower Children | The New Republic

[loveweary11]

I don't have much to offer except to say that I love shaved heads. But raves are still a thing? I mean that really still happens? I thought that went away with the 90s.

 

Can be called music festivals, raving, EDM, etc... Nobody is very specific.

 

 

EDM and Hippies: How Ravers Became the New Flower Children | The New Republic

 

And to really get a feel for what it's like... watch this whole youtube.

 

This is Miami in the last week of March.

 

 

[loveweary11]

I wouldn't worry about the suits. Honestly the only thing that matters to me with clothes is that they fit well and aren't shredded/dirty.

 

As long as they fit a man's body right, and are clean, I do not care in the slightest what the style actually is, as long as that style appears to be making him happy and confident in how he looks.

 

I'd recommend you look into the concept of a capsule wardrobe.

 

Allows you to build a wardrobe made of clothes that ALL go together and can be worn at any variety of events, while using the smallest amount of actual clothing items possible.

 

Ah, thank you. I'll Google that.

 

You know I'm minimalist, so that idea is very appealing.

[Phoe]

Ah, thank you. I'll Google that.

 

You know I'm minimalist, so that idea is very appealing.

 

I remembered that you're minimalist, from the minimalism thread!

 

I currently have a capsule wardrobe. I don't have many clothes but I adore everything I own, always have something to wear, no matter where I'm going, and feel like everything I own is of good quality and looks nice on me.

 

My friends are always boggled at the sight of my closet. Haha

 

Most of the capsule wardrobes I've seen on blogs are made by women, but I know I've seen the occasional men's capsule out there. Just may take a little more digging to find a really good example

[Jessie1231]

Can be called music festivals, raving, EDM, etc... Nobody is very specific.

 

 

EDM and Hippies: How Ravers Became the New Flower Children | The New Republic

 

And to really get a feel for what it's like... watch this whole youtube.

 

This is Miami in the last week of March.

 

 

 

Oh I see. Yes, that's way different from what I remember of the drug fueled raves of the 90s. And the reason I can't comment on your fashion question is because I'm from NC. My last boyfriend worked in NYC two weeks every month and I would go with him sometimes. To say I didn't fit in would be an understatement.

[loveweary11]

.

Unless of course, you do have a multiple personality disorder and become a different person according to wherever you find yourself....

 

Uh oh... lol

 

There is some truth here. I do a lot of different stuff with lots of different types of people.

 

I'm also a bit older than a lot of people I hang out with. It gets very confusing.

[loveweary11]

I remembered that you're minimalist, from the minimalism thread!

 

I currently have a capsule wardrobe. I don't have many clothes but I adore everything I own, always have something to wear, no matter where I'm going, and feel like everything I own is of good quality and looks nice on me.

 

My friends are always boggled at the sight of my closet. Haha

 

Most of the capsule wardrobes I've seen on blogs are made by women, but I know I've seen the occasional men's capsule out there. Just may take a little more digging to find a really good example

 

 

I'm sure the same principles apply to male and female capule wardrobes. I'll definitely check this idea out. thanks

[loveweary11]

Oh I see. Yes, that's way different from what I remember of the drug fueled raves of the 90s. And the reason I can't comment on your fashion question is because I'm from NC. My last boyfriend worked in NYC two weeks every month and I would go with him sometimes. To say I didn't fit in would be an understatement.

 

 

Shhh... I went to the ones in the 90's too.

 

These are a little more plastic, but I think the overall vibe of the people is much, much nicer, more accepting and of course computers have come a long way, so the music is unreal.

[Jessie1231]

Shhh... I went to the ones in the 90's too.

 

These are a little more plastic, but I think the overall vibe of the people is much, much nicer, more accepting and of course computers have come a long way, so the music is unreal.

 

But since I've been drinking a bit and have no plans, if you want to post some pics of you in suits and what not I will definitely give you advice about it.

[loveweary11]

But since I've been drinking a bit and have no plans, if you want to post some pics of you in suits and what not I will definitely give you advice about it.

 

You and I are having the same night. I'm a couple drinks in myself and have no plans since it's all work until June.

 

But we have a problem. I got rid of all my suits when I left the 9-5 rat race bs and this forum doesn't allow pictures. Why...oh why... do they not allow pictures?

[Jessie1231]

You and I are having the same night. I'm a couple drinks in myself and have no plans since it's all work until June.

 

But we have a problem. I got rid of all my suits when I left the 9-5 rat race bs and this forum doesn't allow pictures. Why...oh why... do they not allow pictures?

 

Then what do you wear when you're out? And why NYC? I love it there but it's so expensive! I am so amazed that people actually live there.

[loveweary11]

Then what do you wear when you're out? And why NYC? I love it there but it's so expensive! I am so amazed that people actually live there.

 

Shirts like these, but wide open:

 

,value[/environment/2015/4KT_0505_004R.jpg]&set=key[rotate],value[-0.25]&set=key[width],value[3806]&set=key[height],value[4450]&set=key[x],value[729]&set=key[y],value[263]&set=key[type],value[FASHION_FRONT]&hmver=0&set=key[size],value[240x281]&call=url[file:/mobile/v1/product]"]http://lp.hm.com/hmprod?set=key[source],value[/environment/2015/4KT_0505_004R.jpg]&set=key[rotate],value[-0.25]&set=key[width],value[3806]&set=key[height],value[4450]&set=key[x],value[729]&set=key[y],value[263]&set=key[type],value[FASHION_FRONT]&hmver=0&set=key[size],value[240x281]&call=url[file:/mobile/v1/product]

 

,value[/environment/2014/4AG_0099_024R.jpg]&set=key[rotate],value[-0.45]&set=key[width],value[3595]&set=key[height],value[4204]&set=key[x],value[941]&set=key[y],value[56]&set=key[type],value[FASHION_FRONT]&hmver=0&set=key[size],value[240x281]&call=url[file:/mobile/v1/product]"]http://lp.hm.com/hmprod?set=key[source],value[/environment/2014/4AG_0099_024R.jpg]&set=key[rotate],value[-0.45]&set=key[width],value[3595]&set=key[height],value[4204]&set=key[x],value[941]&set=key[y],value[56]&set=key[type],value[FASHION_FRONT]&hmver=0&set=key[size],value[240x281]&call=url[file:/mobile/v1/product]

 

 

Jeans like these...

 

https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/shopping?q=tbn:ANd9GcT2bDvZl43JoV1Q7mScFk7GjiaCvHOjjnX0XpY5ztBE9PYWI3hHmpYIpEDqIM_eiNDWTCqN6JPn&usqp=CAE

 

Casual shoes like these

 

https://s7d9.scene7.com/is/image/onedist/STACKSVULCII_S92120_BGU_Profile?$ecomm_detail_large$

 

Dress shoes like these

 

http://thumbs4.ebaystatic.com/m/mn25h3EjmOjuJ8QzoBMOhmw/140.jpg

 

 

That's my standard stuff. Not dressy enough for good places, not cool enough for fun places.

[Jessie1231]

Well I like the second shirt and the second pair of shoes. Maybe stop going to the douchie places where you don't feel fancy enough. I'm so confused by this anyway because you could go anywhere in NC dressed like that and be perfect.

[loveweary11]

Well I like the second shirt and the second pair of shoes. Maybe stop going to the douchie places where you don't feel fancy enough. I'm so confused by this anyway because you could go anywhere in NC dressed like that and be perfect.

 

Well, sometimes people are going to the douchie spots. Most of South Beach in the winter is pretty douchie.

 

I always prefer the more down to earth stuff, but sometimes people want to go to the douchie stuff and I'm there too.

 

I can get by with this stuff, but it's like sometimes it's not fancy enough or sometimes it's not cool enough. Even in the same day.

[Jessie1231]

I do think you can never go wrong in a suit. There's just something about it. Maybe it's my obsession with Don Draper, but a man in a suit is just yummy.

[loveweary11]

I do think you can never go wrong in a suit. There's just something about it. Maybe it's my obsession with Don Draper, but a man in a suit is just yummy.

 

 

Check that video out again of Ultra. You'd go very, very wrong in a suit. Same with places like Williamsburg or the LES or East Village.

 

People treat you like a leper in many places if you're a stiff in a suit.

 

I guess getting girls, yes, but socially, no.

 

And suits hide guts and other things out of shape guys have. I like to show my shape. Does that work at all?

 

Would you rater see a fat guy who you don't know is fat looking good in a suit or an in shape, toned guy in more casual clothing? This is sort of where I'm stuck.

 

So many women go for that suit look, while I feel it's phony... fake... not genuine. I'm looking to amp up my casual to look as good as suit level, but be real/genuine.

 

Does that make any sense?

[Anela]

You can add pictures to photo albums in your profile, and make them public or friends only.

[Jessie1231]

Check that video out again of Ultra. You'd go very, very wrong in a suit. Same with places like Williamsburg or the LES or East Village.

 

People treat you like a leper in many places if you're a stiff in a suit.

 

I guess getting girls, yes, but socially, no.

 

And suits hide guts and other things out of shape guys have. I like to show my shape. Does that work at all?

 

Would you rater see a fat guy who you don't know is fat looking good in a suit or an in shape, toned guy in more casual clothing? This is sort of where I'm stuck.

 

So many women go for that suit look, while I feel it's phony... fake... not genuine. I'm looking to amp up my casual to look as good as suit level, but be real/genuine.

 

Does that make any sense?

 

 

Yeah, I don't know what any of those places you named are. When I would go with my boyfriend, I swear I felt like everyone had called each other before we got there and decided what they were all wearing. It was mostly restaurants and bars. I was ok with it because I wasn't there to meet people obviously but I remember thinking how much work it would be to actually live there and go out regularly.

[Taramere]

Post deleted. Not sure what I did wrong, OP, but whatever it was - it seems to have messed up the format of your thread. Unless something's wrong with my computer. Oh...no, I think it's your own links on the second page that have done that.

Edited April 19, 2015 by Taramere

[KatZee]

As corny as this is going to sound...

 

I think you just need to be yourself.

 

I'm a born and bred New Yorker. I don't look like anything out of Williamsburg, or the East Village. I look like me.

 

Another thing I notice, is that all these "styles" you see, "hipster" I guess, was not born out of being a New Yorker. These people were/are all transplants from cities in Ohio, or other mid-US states.

 

If you're looking to fit a style, it's not going to come off authentic no matter how hard you try, as that is not your own style.

[Emilia]

It's all about the material and the cut. The shoes need to be better, OP.

 

You can't wear those cotton tops to cool places, you need to get good quality, 'on trend' shirts. The jeans are good, the shoes (both casual and dress) look cheap. You can't wear plastic soles, come on. The casual ones need to look solid, the smart ones need to have leather soles and look well made.

 

That's how you fit in a range of places and feel comfortable: well made, well cut clothes with a modern fit.