obtuseedge Posted April 21, 2015 Share Posted April 21, 2015 OP, I was exactly in your shoes. Read my post history. I've had some long winding threads. Thankfully, my affair only lasted about 6 months (only physical 2 months) before D-Day. I say luckily because for it to have prolonged, would've been even more painful than it being cut short before it dragged out. Well, obviously I am not you so I don't know how your marriage is like. But I think you are probably taking a lot in your marriage for granted, you connect very well with your AP, because guess what? You've been investing in that relationship and not in the relationship with your wife, so obviously you'd feel a deeper connection with her. The same for me. Since D-Day, I've cut off contact with my AP. But I can tell you, there are days where I deeply miss her. And things at home have not been easy, my wife doesn't look at me the same way, our lives have also drifted apart the last few years, so at times it is difficult to reconnect or find that spark. Yet, I've also come to appreciate so many things about her that I took for granted before. I won't lie, there are moments when I deeply miss my AP and long for her. But I have to step back and take a look at the big picture. My wife has been there for me through the toughest times of my life, and we've gone through every challenge as a team. That's monumental. We've also had to deal with real life challenges and it's not rainbows and butterflies all the time. I have to remind myself that a life with my AP will also lose it's shine after the first stage of romantic love, and also, can I really live with myself leaving my marriage the way I would if I left for my AP? Those are tough questions and I can't answer them for you. But I hope my post helped. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
adna89 Posted April 21, 2015 Share Posted April 21, 2015 You think you don't love your wife because you invest so much into this OW,,you need to stop that.You think you love her,you are just exited about it .maybe its part sexual,par emotional but far from love.Can not be compared to marriage,2 kids Maybe you need to tell your wife this,so you can rebuild your relationship with trust Link to post Share on other sites
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