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ExMM introduced me to light bdsm. I really liked it but not sure if i will anymore outside of A. I'm curious if any of you had same experience and have thoughts on if its because its one more thing that's selfish about him and being able to control something or feeling strong since he felt weak in other areas of life, put down in marriage but too comfortable to leave.

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I dont know if its selfish. In my experience, when we were together sexually, we would fulfill each others fantasies. Light bdsm was always one of mine and I think his too. His wife wanted nothing to do with anything other then the missonary sexual position. (She has told me this also) So we fulfilled it. I think being in an affair, you kind of become someone else. You overstep boundaries that maybe you dont feel you can do in your marriage. At least this is how it was for me.

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still_an_Angel

How does he identify - dom or sub? maybe both? Does he take the role of a dominant when he plays with you? From your post, sounds like he's a sub at home (?)

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