Girlfriend Wants Space, Because She Met A New Guy..

[patrick1990]

To start off i will try to explain as much as possible. my main language is not english. and i know its a long story. so hopeffuly is not confusing. Im 24 and she is 21.

 

i met a really awesome girl on the xbox where i play for over a year with. After 5 months of playing she told me on skype she really likes me. and that she wants to try a relationship with me. i was really sceptical at first. because i life in the nederlands and she lives in the uk. but after a week of 2 i was feeling for her 2. and i wanted to try with her to start something. and come to her pretty soon, to meet her. she sended presents for me on my bday. and so did i. but after her bday it all went down.

 

She had 2 weeks off when she had her bday (18 march). the orignal plan was to meet her in those 2 weeks. but because i finally got a job again after 2 years. i coudnt call myself free in that time of period. because i just got my job. so we decide it to do it in may. first week went all good. i sended her presents to her on her bday so she can unwrap it on her bday. also sended flowers to her. because she never had that before from her exes so i decide to suprise her. but the second week she met a new guy online. that she first only played in the afternoon. because i was in work. after she met him, i could tell she changed a little bit. getting faster annoyed by stuff. or just where texting well we played the game. what she normally wont do. because we both dont like when we play a game and the other person is just standing there.

i didnt really told her the first 2 nights it was annoying me. but on sunday, 3 weeks ago. it all went worse.

 

She told me before sunday she is going to be online on the xbox early. so i decide to come online 2. so i can join her, and have fun together. as soon as i joint her. she sounded down. so i said to her, whats wrong. she woudnt tell me, and normally when she wont tell me whats wrong its because off me.

 

i get a feeling that she didnt want to play with me but instead the new guy. after awhile i could hear her phone going off alot and i didnt really react to it. and i knew she was texting again with the new guy. because she was just standing (not playing) there and not replying to what i said. so i get a little bit annoyed so i decide to just do the same and not play the game anymore, but just texting with people. but then she was getting mad because i was texting and not playing the game. like she did..

 

after that we didnt really talkt alot and the new guy joint our conversasion soon after that. i was reacting normal to him. after that i went offline and didnt really talked to her. until theusday. when i was asking if she wanted to go on skype to talk about what happend on sunday.

 

She didnt want to go on skype. and she just want to text it. i didnt really want to type it all out. but i did and after i told her everything. she wanted to have some space all the sudden.and said, she doesnt want to be in a distance relationship anymore. my reaction was offcourse, why all the sudden now. i have the feeling its because of her new friend. because she is acting different since. she thinks she cant have friends because of my reaction. and because her ex was like that. and thinks im jalous she said. im not though. and i told her she can play with however she want. i told that so many times.

 

But the thing is, that what she is doing now. is kinda already happend. because i feel she just droped me for someone else. just like that. after i tryd to make her bday the best. by spending over 300 euro on her presents. because i coudnt come to her yet, so i decide to give her awesome presents to let her know i really do like her.

 

like i said, she kinda droped me for a different guy already when we didnt where in a distance relationship yet. but just as friends. fast recap. when we know each other for like 4 months i sended her the first present as a friend. a game we can play together. and it was also in her vacation. she met a new guy to play with. and i coudnt really play with her anymore for like 2 weeks. also tryd to avoid me. by setting herself offline so i coudnt tell if she was online. especailly on a day where she told me we where going to play together. i almost lost her by this guy. but because i made her in love with me by being myself. she choice me again instead of that other guy.

 

but going back to know i didnt spoke to her for like 2 weeks and i feel complely **** at the moment. i keep thinking about the fun things we had in games or just by talking to each other on skype. i got a feeling she is not honest with me. like she is saying she wanted more space from me. and whant to spend more time with her family by not going as much online as she did with me. but the strange thing is, is that i see her more online than ever. she normally came online at 10 oclock at night. and than we used to play until 4 oclock. but she told me she cant stay up that late anymore. so we just played until 1 oclock normally. but now i see her more online than ever. staying online till 7 oclock in the morning and coming online at 5 oclock in the afternoon. or even earlyer. maybe its just me over thinking it at the moment. because also being honest i can think normall anymore. i really like her and dont want to lose her. but i think i already lost her by now

 

im really confused what is going on. and if she ever going to send me a message back. or i should send her a message about how long she wants space from me. i got a feeling she liked the other guy alot more at the moment. and dont know how i need to be like now.. its been almost 3 weeks since sunday, we didnt really talked and 2 weeks that i didnt spoke to her at all. i dont feel myself at all, at the moment. i feel i didnt only lost girlfriend but also a really good friend. i spoke her almost everyday. or atleast on watsapp. i kinda knew this was going to happend as soon as she met someone new. because this already happend before, but now its even worse. hopefully someone can give me good advise.

[CarrieT]

I didn't have to read your whole post - your title says it all.

 

She "wants space" = she wants to put you on a back-burner...

 

"Because she met a new guy" = she wants to dabble in a new relationship and if it doesn't work out, wants to come back to you.

 

Bottom line: She wants to play around, so let her. Just don't be there for her during the process or if she wants to come back.

 

i.e., Break up with her first.

[Diezel]

Carrie's response.

 

#endthread

[Holmes85]

Patrick1990,

 

Allow me to translate what "space" means when it comes to relationships and girls who are flaky.

 

I need some space = You know I met this interesting guy that I feel something for, I am not sure if the feelings are mutual, provide me some space so I can explore things further with him, during that space if it doesn't work out with him, I'll be more than happy come back to you and pretend nothing ever happened.

 

What do you do? You pre-emptively dump her.

[oldshirt]

I stopped reading after you said you were in the Netherlands and she was in the U.K.

 

The answer here is simple ask out and date women in your own location.

[Clarence_Boddicker]

Yup, she's done with you as a primary bf. You're her backup. Unless it's a FWB deal that satisfies you, just walk away. Sometimes the easiest way is not to initiate contact. If she keeps pestering you, block or change your contact info.