slingshot Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 I have fallen for a co-worker, a married co-worker at that. I have always found her physically attractive, but now her and I are texting a lot which caused me to fall for her. Suddenly though her texts have seem more passive and less enthusiastic. Who knows though, I think I am just causing my mind to think things. She and I work in the same building but I only see her one day a week and it is usually in passing or for limited amount of time. Well she texted me one day on my work phone from her work phone to let me know about something I needed to get at the office. We started texting a lot, we've been texting everyday since...she is usually the one who reaches out to me first...but when we text it is all through the work day. The only time we do not text each other is when the work day is over, or Saturday and Sunday. Our text started out friendly, but over time became more close in content. Nothing sexual or perverse. Just chit chat really, one day though I told her about a date I had that night...she quizzed me and what not. And anytime I speak of the girl I had a date with she kinda gives me a hard time about it. Through time though I have flirted with my co-worker and my co-worker made comments to me that I always make her smile and laugh, and I am the best part of her work days. I once jokingly said if you were single, I'd be after a date with you...she said trust me it would work. At times we joked if there was only a time machine where it was possible that we met each other at a earlier time in life. So my dilemma is does she mean this stuff? She is married, and maybe she just likes the attention. My problem is I have grown attached to us talking, and read into things. This past week though she didnt reach out to me like she usually does. She usually texts me first and early in the morning, but I reached out to her first on 2 occasions. Secondly the conversations to myself have become more dry....who knows maybe it is all in my head. Could she have been interested but got scared? Or did she just enjoy the attention? Either way from now on I only plan to talk to her if she speaks to me first, and I plan to be more short with my responses. Any thoughts or opinions? Link to post Share on other sites
Space Ritual Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 Yeah I have some thoughts and opinions...... Knock it off. She is married Nothing good is going to become of this. You are attracted to the emotions she is stirring in you and she is attracted to the attention she gets from you. You are going down a path you only take if you are comfortable dealing with the consequences. Like perhaps getting the crap kicked out of you by her husband and non stop drama with you smack dab in the middle of it. If you can deal with all of the above consequences and are perfectly confident that the risk is worth the reward, be my guest. And then tell me in about 6 months how it's going when you have a Lifetime Movie of the week on your hands and you are in trouble at work with screwing around with a coworker. But since you actually took the time to write on LS you must already have some concerns about what this all entails. And you perhaps just saved yourself from a boatload of crap you don't need at a price you can't afford. I'll state it again....NOTHING GOOD IS GOING TO COME OF THIS! Seriously cut this out now or you'll regret t! Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 She probably just likes (liked) the attention and started feeling like she was stepping out. It doesn't mean she actually wants or wanted to do anything with you. Most dignified response imo is to not get moody and silent (you'll make yourself like like emotionally immature child), but take her cue that your dialog needs to go back toward the professional end. So don't stop talking, but don't push the flirt anymore. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
devilish innocent Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 It's really none of your business how she actually feels about you. She's a married woman. This is how affairs get started. If she's backed off from talking to you, it's very likely that she's realized your conversations have become inappropriate. She might still go back to being friendlier. I hope you keep your distance either way. Her husband isn't going to magically disappear from the picture. You're only going to end up hurt if things continue. The further things go, the more hurt you'll be. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 It was all in your head. She was platonically texting you during work hours, ribbing you about your dates, just like any chummy coworker would do. You obviously are showing your true feelings for her and like the other posters mentioned, she realizes this and backs off.....it has become inappropriate and she doesn't want to give you the wrong impression. So no, it's not what you think. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrin Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 A) Nothing good will come of this B) She may have pulled back because she didn't want to give you the wrong impression C) Don't be a d*** and get into some sort of emotional affair with the lady Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts