Rubick Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 (edited) My ex has been posting photos clearly aimed at me. About how she misses the past, but "life moves on and you have to keep up with it." Whenever we talk, I end up getting really apologetic, and clearly turning her off. She starts ignoring me and acting really mean. Sometimes I even get frustrated at this and rage text her. I tried not contacting her for a bit, so we could both cool down. I texted her a month later asking if I could drop off something, and she seemed happy to hear from me. When I dropped it off it was a little awkward, but she ended up hugging me and telling me that she would like to hang out some time. I clearly screwed up after this because I yet again, apologized for how I got angry with her the month before. She started ignoring me again, and I went into panic mode. I basically ended up apologizing for apologizing and she got really annoyed really quickly. She ended up sending me a picture of a guy kissing her to essentially shut me up. She did this exact thing once before, and ended up begging for me back, literally in tears over the phone saying she was wrong. Yet I some how ****ed that up too. Maybe history will repeat itself? I don't know, I'm a mess. I feel like I need time to heal properly and try again when I'm not so self conscious, but I feel like by then she'll be completely over me, and that possible spark will be gone forever. P.S. I know she's not perfect, I know she's probably "not right for me" and I know I should move on, but regardless of that fact I want her, and I feel like she wants me too, but whenever I talk to her I just push her away so she's getting impatient and in yet another rebound relationship. Edited April 26, 2015 by Rubick Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 Okay, allowing you your prerogative in pursuing her or not, the answer's clear on what not to do if you keep it up - don't apologize! I know that it tends to be human nature to want to grovel when a relationship's broken and you want to fix it - beg, plead, apologize, etc. Those are all the wrong things to do bc they just make you look like a puss, and that's not attractive. She wants to feel attracted to you, not like you're pathetic. I wouldn't suggest suddenly becoming an a-hole (you couldn't do it convincingly anyway), but stop being wishy-washy and soft. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 Excessive apologising, begging and pleading, is guaranteed to make someone lose all respect for you. Maintain your dignity at all times, no matter how upset you might be. You owe that to yourself. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rubick Posted April 26, 2015 Author Share Posted April 26, 2015 Thanks for the advice! How do I apply that when I'm out of contact with her though? I doubt she'll contact me ever, she's not like that, and I really can't contact her right now, she's got way too many walls when it comes to me right now. Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 You've got a limited play in that respect. Just don't contact her. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Rubick Posted April 26, 2015 Author Share Posted April 26, 2015 You've got a limited play in that respect. Just don't contact her. But how am I supposed to apply your advice? Like I said, she's really not the one to "make the first move." and I highly doubt she'll contact me first. Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 You can't make someone want to be with you when they don't. If she wants to be with you, she'll let you know. If she doesn't, you'll get more silence. Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 But how am I supposed to apply your advice? Like I said, she's really not the one to "make the first move." and I highly doubt she'll contact me first. Well as long as you're not talking to her, you won't be apologizing, right? That's the main thing. Maybe she'll start thinking you're all badass and reach out again herself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 You block her from all social media so you don't know what she's posting. What you don't know can't hurt you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mrlonelyone Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 You block her from all social media so you don't know what she's posting. What you don't know can't hurt you. Block her from social media so you can't see her stuff and she can't see your stuff. Force her to, if she is going to communicate with you, to do it by direct means. Then go NC until and unless she contacts you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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