Top tier men are hoarding all the women

[JuneJulySeptember]

You mean they list black men as a preference on their profile? Interesting.

 

 

Yes, there's not many profiles, but about half of them did. In my area (where there's a significant AA population), it's a lot less.

[Toodaloo]

My nose is facing the camera directly. It's f'n huge. I'm known as a guy with a big nose. I've always had one of the biggest noses..

 

I love big noses... still not going to date you though... Sorry about that...

 

Reading through a load of this thread... what a load of utter tripe and garbage. All I can see are some sad lonely chaps who are basing their opinions on a few episodes of a dodgy drama. Get out of your boxes boys and get out in the REAL WORLD. There are REAL people out there.

 

There is no problem what so ever with the "normal average guy" getting dates as long as he goes out and is sociable. If he sits on his arse at home watching reruns on TV he is hardly getting any social interaction is he!

[empresario]

Why'd you go and kill your credibility like that?

 

You actually had me going. You really did.

 

Some guys were probably taking notes on your list too.

 

Haha, nothing wrong with education. It's because of my education I've been able to become this person. Everything I've done is patterns-based, analytical, and part of the scientific process.

 

 

In the words of Borgore..."I'm sorry that I made it all the way to where I am today". Sorry, too much EDM lately.

[JuneJulySeptember]

I love big noses... still not going to date you though... Sorry about that...

 

Reading through a load of this thread... what a load of utter tripe and garbage. All I can see are some sad lonely chaps who are basing their opinions on a few episodes of a dodgy drama. Get out of your boxes boys and get out in the REAL WORLD. There are REAL people out there.

 

There is no problem what so ever with the "normal average guy" getting dates as long as he goes out and is sociable. If he sits on his arse at home watching reruns on TV he is hardly getting any social interaction is he!

 

The only problem is almost everybody thinks of themselves as 'average'.

 

Since you're British, the BBC is very prolific (for some reason) in releasing shows about disfigured persons. You should watch them, they're good shows. It probably goes without no surprise that they have trouble getting dates even though they are good, decent people who are funny and earthy.

 

Well, you say "That's not what I meant by average." Hey. That's not fair.

 

Now, I'm not saying whining is good, but you just cannot generalize. IMO, it's always best to err on the side of sympathy.

[Toodaloo]

I say...

 

If he sits on his arse at home watching reruns on TV he is hardly getting any social interaction is he!

 

you say...

 

the BBC is very prolific (for some reason) in releasing shows about disfigured persons. You should watch them, they're good shows.

 

Need I say more?

 

Thank you for proving me right.

 

I actually have little time for TV. I am too busy doing things. Not all of them social, but some are... thank you for the suggestion of watching people who are disadvantaged for entertainment though... I think I would rather pull my finger nails out with a pair of pliers.

[JuneJulySeptember]

I say...

 

 

 

you say...

 

 

 

Need I say more?

 

Thank you for proving me right.

 

I actually have little time for TV. I am too busy doing things. Not all of them social, but some are... thank you for the suggestion of watching people who are disadvantaged for entertainment though... I think I would rather pull my finger nails out with a pair of pliers.

 

OK. Cool. Nice talking to you.

[JuneJulySeptember]

If only the top tier ladies would stop hoarding all the guys, life would be perfect. Why do Jennifer and Marcia have to do that?!

 

Women don't create threads about that stuff typically.

 

But they do complain about "all guys liking the same men" and "no guys like them". There have been a number of instances where women have complained (openly on Facebook or openly in a social setting) that they cannot get men even though I asked them out before and they declined. I understand. We ALL get stuck in that rut where we exaggerate our troubles.

 

Now, your last post said you were low-main, so I'm just appealing to that side of you. We all whine from time to time, and we pick ourselves up and get back on the horse.

 

Again, whining is not good and I myself have a date this weekend so I'm not currently whining, but sympathy ... is good.

 

Anyway, I need to get some work done today.

[Toodaloo]

Women don't create threads about that stuff typically.

 

But they do complain about "all guys liking the same men"

 

Damn - Next time I will take the gay men out of my filters on OLD...

 

Good luck with your date. Hope all goes well.

[JuneJulySeptember]

Damn - Next time I will take the gay men out of my filters on OLD...

 

Good luck with your date. Hope all goes well.

 

Thank you!

 

See. Sympathy. We're people here. Not just arseholes behind a screen to be yelled at and argued with.

[Toodaloo]

Thank you!

 

See. Sympathy. We're people here. Not just arseholes behind a screen to be yelled at and argued with.

 

I didn't yell. Its very rare that I yell. I don't need to.

 

I said that you were making bad decisions by staying behind a computer screen not that you were a holes. I said that you were complaining because of the consequences of your own actions... You still could be an a hole but I don't know you so no comment.

 

Yes I am arguing with you.

 

Its not sympathy. Its empathy. Which has been evident all the way through.

[lollipopspot]

Now, your last post said you were low-main, so I'm just appealing to that side of you. We all whine from time to time, and we pick ourselves up and get back on the horse.

 

Again, whining is not good and I myself have a date this weekend so I'm not currently whining, but sympathy ... is good.

 

Don't take it seriously. I was just being silly

[JuneJulySeptember]

Its empathy. Which has been evident all the way through.

 

That's fine.

 

Seriously, you should watch the show though. It's good.

Edited May 19, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Phoe]

That's fine, you're entitled to your own opinion. The difference of leave-in conditioner and gloss drops was Shaun White compared to Aragorn from Lord of the Rings. Yes I have long hair for a guy. Yes it fits my face, looks good, and makes my baby-face dissipate. But only if it's contained. Again, look up Shaun white. I was told I looked like him constantly. Now I'm like...a medieval warrior or something!

 

 

At the end of the day...I would make a change...see how people react to it, then make another change. Eventually I was attractive.

 

 

But more specifically, if you want a cute, successful lady, you have to match her success. I do appreciate and respect your points. You did admit that most women the guys in this thread want do those things naturally. I agree. For some of us, especially us guys, it isn't natural. We aren't brought into the world being taught a regiment of beauty routines. It's not innate. But it does help.

 

You misunderstood what I said.

 

I'm not talking about "beauty routines" being innate, I was talking about all the other things on the list. You pretty much took my post, and presumed the exact opposite from it, lol.

 

The things that people do naturally aren't the superficial hair and clothes preferences, I don't care about that bit. The things that people do naturally are the social based things in the original list. And I'm not talking about women, I'm talking about PEOPLE.

 

I don't want to essentially retype the same post over, but take a look at my previous post again, I was talking about the social things. Watching others, noting reactions, striving to push oneself, the things related to that, that were on your list of things to do.

 

Those are things that many people (not just women, men and women) strive to do naturally, and NOT because they are hoping it will get the someone, but because they WANT to. Because it brings them enjoyment. It makes them a better person, for themselves.

 

 

 

I agree some of them are pretty normal and I do some of them as well. I mentioned that.

 

Anyway, the main the problem with doing this kind of stuff to get women, is that when you get rejected, you're just going to furiously keep working on this stuff and blaming yourself.

 

"I got rejected. Well if I was buffer, or if I had a graduate degree, that girl would want me."

 

That's a problem...

 

The problem is when the only reason anyone improves themselves, is solely for the sake of attracting a mate.

 

The self improvement, the steps to push oneself socially, be physically active, to study others and have interests - that should be done because it simply improves ones life!

 

I'm always striving to improve myself. Not for men, but because it makes me happy and proud of myself to always be pushing my limits and experiencing new things.

 

Extraordinary isn't a pre-requesite for me. And some people simply don't want to go that route...they don't roll that way.

 

I mean I do dress nice when I go out , get a haircut, groom myself, wear cologne, etc. But that's the extent of my "extraordinary". lol

 

Extraordinary isn't even physical. That's the point I'm making.

 

Yes, I think people should be groomed and clean and take care of themselves and do things for themselves that makes them feel attractive. I think that's the more important part about the superficial. That you're doing it for yourself, because it makes you feel attractive, not only because it's presumed that it's necessary to make OTHERS think you're attractive... that's a waste of effort! What's the point in that?

 

 

Also, I will say this about clothing and style...

 

 

It may not matter to you. It may just not. To most people it does. For example, girls tell me all the time that they buy clothes to fit their body. Guys can do the same thing. The effects are way more subtle...but a nice pair of clothing that fits you correctly makes a ton of difference.

 

 

Like me. I'm 6'2''. I have a 6'4'' torso. I think my legs forgot to keep growing. I have to find tall/slim clothing if I want to look my best. The local cotton shirts at Wal-Mart will do nothing for my natural height and build. Nor will their dress shirts. Now, a shirt from Express...those things make me look very clean.

 

There's a difference between actively choosing clothes that fit well, and "style" IMO.

 

Yes, people should wear clothes that fit, and that are clean. There's no good reason for most people to be walking around in rumpled up, stained, too small shirts.

 

But the actual "style" of them, is far less relevant.

 

I feel like my overall point in this thread may not be coming through... I feel like I'm struggling a bit to clearly say what I mean...

 

All in all, yes, people should take care of themselves. Groom, dress in clothes that fit, have good hygiene, be active, etc. But it doesn't have to be a huge thing. It's as if there's only 2 sides. Either you're Timmy, wearing a stained too small shirt and too small ripped up high waisted jeans, or you're chad with perfect sexy glossy hair and fancy stylish clothes.

 

There's so much more than that, and there's no reason to think so hard about it!

[Rejected Rosebud]

Maybe this has been clarified before and I just couldn't find it but can someone please explain to me what "top tier" men are and also how women can be hoarded??

[empresario]

You misunderstood what I said.

 

I'm not talking about "beauty routines" being innate, I was talking about all the other things on the list. You pretty much took my post, and presumed the exact opposite from it, lol.

 

The things that people do naturally aren't the superficial hair and clothes preferences, I don't care about that bit. The things that people do naturally are the social based things in the original list. And I'm not talking about women, I'm talking about PEOPLE.

 

I don't want to essentially retype the same post over, but take a look at my previous post again, I was talking about the social things. Watching others, noting reactions, striving to push oneself, the things related to that, that were on your list of things to do.

 

Those are things that many people (not just women, men and women) strive to do naturally, and NOT because they are hoping it will get the someone, but because they WANT to. Because it brings them enjoyment. It makes them a better person, for themselves.

 

 

 

 

 

The problem is when the only reason anyone improves themselves, is solely for the sake of attracting a mate.

 

The self improvement, the steps to push oneself socially, be physically active, to study others and have interests - that should be done because it simply improves ones life!

 

I'm always striving to improve myself. Not for men, but because it makes me happy and proud of myself to always be pushing my limits and experiencing new things.

 

 

 

Extraordinary isn't even physical. That's the point I'm making.

 

Yes, I think people should be groomed and clean and take care of themselves and do things for themselves that makes them feel attractive. I think that's the more important part about the superficial. That you're doing it for yourself, because it makes you feel attractive, not only because it's presumed that it's necessary to make OTHERS think you're attractive... that's a waste of effort! What's the point in that?

 

 

 

 

There's a difference between actively choosing clothes that fit well, and "style" IMO.

 

Yes, people should wear clothes that fit, and that are clean. There's no good reason for most people to be walking around in rumpled up, stained, too small shirts.

 

But the actual "style" of them, is far less relevant.

 

I feel like my overall point in this thread may not be coming through... I feel like I'm struggling a bit to clearly say what I mean...

 

All in all, yes, people should take care of themselves. Groom, dress in clothes that fit, have good hygiene, be active, etc. But it doesn't have to be a huge thing. It's as if there's only 2 sides. Either you're Timmy, wearing a stained too small shirt and too small ripped up high waisted jeans, or you're chad with perfect sexy glossy hair and fancy stylish clothes.

 

There's so much more than that, and there's no reason to think so hard about it!

 

I understand now, thanks for clarifying. I have severe ADHD so sometimes I skim over key parts of posts because I get excited about the conversation. And I currently ceased medication so it's even worse.

 

 

Any who, yes, most people understand and react to social cues. The only thing I disagree with is your analysis that those that do, do it because 'they want to'. They may, but the corollary of that is people that don't follow social normal just don't care. That is false.

 

 

I just have no natural social awareness. When I was eccentric and weird (and trust me, I was), I had no idea why people avoided me...nor did I know what I was doing was traditionally awkward. For some people it does take a bit of practice and self-awareness.

 

 

EDIT:

 

 

Also on style...

 

 

There are definitely people that try too hard. However, style definitely exists for males. And it does make you more attractive when done right (but not overdone). But again, not everyone falls into the same category. Just like some women are impressed by my ability to pick out the great cars that I drive (and that I can afford it)...but more than that just don't care because cars don't interest them. The faulty way of looking at it is that I drive my nice cars for them. That's not true. I drive my nice cars because it makes me feel good. It is fun to drive nice vehicles. It gives me confidence, etc.

Edited May 19, 2015 by empresario

[jay1983]

Maybe this has been clarified before and I just couldn't find it but can someone please explain to me what "top tier" men are and also how women can be hoarded??

 

They're talking about very attractive guys who often have attractive gals interested in them. The examples in the original post are extremely over exaggerated.

 

It is however somewhat true, but not as black and white as it's being made out to be. These chads and john or whatever and the girls chasing them are amongst the single crowd. I think that's why they're painting this picture which is a sweeping generalization.

 

The thing about jack and chad (I forget the names used) is the girls who like them are more attractive than the girls who like billy and willy. That's the common explaination for why these guys see it this way.

[lino]

Maybe this has been clarified before and I just couldn't find it but can someone please explain to me what "top tier" men are and also how women can be hoarded??

 

Go to any social setting. You'll see it at play.

 

Still dumbfounded that people wish to deny this.

[Woggle]

These top tier men should be on an episode of Hoarders and their house gets condemned if they don't get all these women out of there.

[stillafool]

Maybe this has been clarified before and I just couldn't find it but can someone please explain to me what "top tier" men are and also how women can be hoarded??

 

Yes, and also does this mean that the "top tier" women are hoarding all the men?

[Woggle]

Yes, and also does this mean that the "top tier" women are hoarding all the men?

 

Next on Hoarders.

[xxoo]

 

It is however somewhat true, but not as black and white as it's being made out to be. These chads and john or whatever and the girls chasing them are amongst the single crowd. I think that's why they're painting this picture which is a sweeping generalization..

 

 

So what you're saying is that of the single men, most of the women are going after a small segment of men. That's very different from how I was thinking about this. It makes a little more sense, frankly. Basically, when you remove the majority of men and women who are already partnered, the remaining men and women have trouble pairing up because there are lots of women interested in some, and very few women interested in others.

 

There will always be a segment that is struggling to date, so they will remain single. And there will always be happily, permanently single guys who just like sleeping with lots of women. It doesn't change the fact that MOST men and women pair off without much trouble.

[xxoo]

Yes, and also does this mean that the "top tier" women are hoarding all the men?

 

I'd love to see a definition of "top tier" woman!

 

I bet she doesn't sleep with lots of men

[TouchedByViolet]

I took "top tier man" to mean a guy who attracts lots of women (most women find him sexually attractive). He has lots of options... Similarly, a "top tier woman" to me would be a girl who attracts lots of men... She may or may not be dating and sleeping with these men. She has lots of options is all...

 

Being top tier based on the OP's description says nothing about relationship quality and nothing about the person's personality quality. It's more about turning heads and the option of bedroom acrobatics.

[Phoe]

 

I just have no natural social awareness. When I was eccentric and weird (and trust me, I was), I had no idea why people avoided me...nor did I know what I was doing was traditionally awkward. For some people it does take a bit of practice and self-awareness.

 

 

Heh, as a girl who's not always the most socially aware, I definitely get it. I'm a bit odd sometimes, definitely get called weird or awkward from time to time.

 

But the people who call me weird do so endearingly. They like it. It's okay to be a little weird and a little odd. Cookie cutter isn't all that fun

 

So while it's good to pay attention to social cues and do your best to be aware, it's good to be a little weird sometimes too

[jay1983]

So what you're saying is that of the single men, most of the women are going after a small segment of men. That's very different from how I was thinking about this. It makes a little more sense, frankly. Basically, when you remove the majority of men and women who are already partnered, the remaining men and women have trouble pairing up because there are lots of women interested in some, and very few women interested in others.

 

There will always be a segment that is struggling to date, so they will remain single. And there will always be happily, permanently single guys who just like sleeping with lots of women. It doesn't change the fact that MOST men and women pair off without much trouble.

 

Yeah, you can see it playout in hyperdrive on the dating sites.

 

There are gals and there are single gals.

 

That's pretty much the reason for most of the disagreement on this board. Guys say girls want such and such, girls say no it's not like that it's so and so. Stuff doesn't add up to anyone.........