angry Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 I'm 21 and have a nice boyfriend.however, he has this friend (girl) whom he says they are superficial friends. this girl talks to me once in a while but we are not friends. She likes to brag about my boyfriend going out to eat with her and paying for her meal, i trust my boyfriend but her comments bother me. my boyfriend told me that she used to suffer from bulimia and that she has a very flat low-self steem. i was so angry at her that i was gonna tell her she is getting chubby just to make her feel bad about her body. but i decided not to. I need advice on how can i handle this. do i talk to her or my boyfriend ?and how do i do it? Link to post Share on other sites
Newgirl Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 Dear Angry, Before you do anything rash you should talk (calmly) with your boyfriend. You need to communicate to him how his friend's comments are making you feel. If he disregards your comments, then you need to really impress upon him that this is really affecting you and you are concerned. Remind him that you trust him, but you don't appreciate what his friend is saying to you. Perhaps he can tell her it's unacceptable. Or if you feel comfortable, tell her yourself. But I would go to your boyfriend first. Seems to me that this girl has low self-esteem and bragging to you is her way of feeling like she has worth. Remind yourself of that when she makes comments to you! Newgirl Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 Just exactly what's the problem? Her comments may bother you but that's because you let them. Since she has very low self esteem, she is likely to say anything that will make her feel better. She can't help it if your boyfriend took her for a meal or two. He was probably doing it to make her feel good...or because she was just around. She probably told you about it to make herself feel good as well. Getting angry with her for making stupid remarks is pretty lame. It would be more appropriate to feel sorry for her for being so ignorant, having such low self esteem, and not having a boyfriend of her own. There is really nothing to handle here. Let this girl screw up her own life. She's doing quite a good job of it without any intervention on your part whatsoever. I also don't think it would be a good idea to tell your boyfriend not to be her acquaintance. Guys don't like to have restrictions like that. Rise above the situation and just avoid her. If you aren't around her, she can't upset you. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts