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Potential Affair Situation - Job Interview


taintedlove

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taintedlove

Hello guys,

 

I need some help with a current situation. I recently went to an interview where a man and a woman interviewed me for a corporate position within the company. I was introduced to both of them and sat down in a large boardroom where the interview was to be taken place.

 

The woman proceeded to ask me the usual interview questions and I answered her. I noticed that the man was quiet at the beginning but he kept smiling and staring at me. Obviously, he had to observe me because it was an interview.

 

After a while, he began engaging in the interview and asking me questions. I noticed that there was prolonged eye contact every time he talked or listened to me and even when the woman was talking, we somehow kept staring at each other. I still thought that maybe it was nothing and that maybe I was over-thinking because of job interview nerves,

 

When the interview ended, I walked out of the boardroom and the woman remained in the room so I assumed that I would just let myself out. However, the man followed me out. I looked back and saw him staring at my legs. I proceeded to make casual small talk on the way out and he laughed even though I didn't really say anything funny.

 

I opened the last door to finally go out of the building and he extended his hand to shake my hand even though I had one hand occupied with the door. I smiled awkwardly and then he stared at me again with a smile and said 'have a good day! good luck' very enthusiastically.

 

Guess what? I am invited back for another interview. The man was a manager so I am quite sure that he had a big part in the decision. I am not sure if I want to take a job because a man had taken a fancy to me but more because I am very good for the position.

 

I found out that he is actually married with a young kid. I am not sure if I should still take this position because I am unsure of what is going to happen with him if I do. Maybe it was just harmless? I can't really tell. What do you guys think?

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LovelyBrown

I wouldn't think so just from him being friendly. My boss and I conduct interviews together and I know he has a strong personality that sometimes comes off as flirtatious, he's aware of this and I think utilizes it to see how people handle themselves under these circumstances. He does the strong eye contact, and it's definitely very smiley. I would go to the second interview and see what happens.

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still_an_Angel

Its going to be your call whether to engage with him in activities outside of work. Maybe its just his style when interviewing applicants, don't assume its anything else. Be confident of your abilities to do the job, after all, you got the first interview without him. ;)

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Friskyone4u

You are an adult woman and should know how to shut down a married man, boss or no boss . I hope you are not asking this question because you would consider accepting any advances from him.

If you accept this position there is a department called HR. If you need to use it and it will not be hard to out a stop to any ideas or fantasies he has about your legs and the rest of you.

The only potential for an affair here is if you play along .

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Some people have that way about them. Long stares and long, firm handshakes.

 

Just keep it professional.

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You had a job interview and you are worried about getting embroiled in an affair?

 

 

Any chance you may have a bit of an over active imagination and be putting the cart in front of the horse a little bit?

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He can fancy you all he wants; doesn't mean you have to have anything other than a professional relationship with him.

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No matter what this guy may/may not be looking for... you're a grown woman and have boundaries and choices. You can easily tell him to back off.

 

Unless you're looking for an affair... then you should probably mosey on over to the OM/OW and read the disaster stories there.

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Maybe he's just a flirty man. I am, but it doesn't mean I'm looking for an affair just that I enjoy a bit of mild flirting. I wouldn't assume it's anything more than that unless he makes an unmistakeable advance on you.

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Friskyone4u

And by the way, if you accept his advances and get caught, your new job may be very short lived. most corporations do not think too highly of married employees having sex with new employees.

 

Maybe that will spur you to disengage from your potential affair thoughts.

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Have you ever been involved in a affair before?

 

 

If you're thinking for one second it's a potential affair situation (which you must be) then I'm sure it could be that.

 

Good reason to turn down that second interview.

 

Reason? The man interviewing makes me uncomfortable.

Edited by beach
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autumnnight

He made eye contact with the person he was interviewing, he smiled a lot, he walked you to the elevator, and he might have looked at your legs (maybe).

 

How exactly does this translate to him trolling for an A and expecting you to put out cause he recommended you or something?

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Grapesofwrath

If you really want/need the job, then proceed. Conduct yourself professionally. He won't interview you twice, most likely. You will be interviewed by someone else.

 

In a corporate environment, most companies require that managers take annual training in sexual harassment. They will have an HR department who can handle any sexual harassment issues should they arise.

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gettingstronger

Not every person that checks you out wants to sleep with you- not every person that wants to sleep with you has to be successful in doing so-

 

I think you are reading too much in to it and perhaps a little wishful thinking because you are still a bit bruised-

 

If you want the job, go for it- if not- turn it down if offered-

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