Author biggles6087 Posted May 17, 2015 Author Share Posted May 17, 2015 Well after she dumped me on Thursday I was out last night with my mates and there wives and girlfriends anyway been the only single one there I started to feel very lonely,I had a few bottles to but wasn't really drunk.I took the phone out of my pocket and I text the ex funnily enough she replied,she wished me a happy birthday and told me that she wanted to be my friend but she wanted me to have some space away from her and she was sorry that she hurt me like she did .I'm confused why the space if she only wanted friendship I'm not really all that upset today actually having a great day for a change but confused over what she text me last night cant believe tho I broke the no contact rule. Link to post Share on other sites
hunk Posted May 17, 2015 Share Posted May 17, 2015 Delete and block her number and you won't have this problem again. Her text meant nothing, was just her being polite. Her asking for space means she doesn't want to be involved with you anymore and she wants you to leave her alone. This is impossible to conceive right now, i understand, but it's the 100% indisputable truth at this point. Delete and block . Link to post Share on other sites
Author biggles6087 Posted May 17, 2015 Author Share Posted May 17, 2015 Delete and block her number and you won't have this problem again. Her text meant nothing, was just her being polite. Her asking for space means she doesn't want to be involved with you anymore and she wants you to leave her alone. This is impossible to conceive right now, i understand, but it's the 100% indisputable truth at this point. Delete and block . Thanks hunk I suppose your right just after deleting her number now I dont think the friendship thing would work. Link to post Share on other sites
aloneinaz Posted May 17, 2015 Share Posted May 17, 2015 Thanks hunk I suppose your right just after deleting her number now I dont think the friendship thing would work. Delete her number so you don't drunk text her again. She doesn't REALLY want to be your friend BTW, she's just being polite.. When you're done with a significant other, you certainly don't want to hang out with them. Lord knows I never did when I've ended relationships. Link to post Share on other sites
Author biggles6087 Posted May 18, 2015 Author Share Posted May 18, 2015 Why is it that when a lady is breaking up with you why do they always start with saying your an nice super and amazing guy but .......... does anyone else find this patronising I would rather a text or call saying sorry its over and that it is it without sending that sorry just having a rant this morning and venting out. But does anyone else find that text insulting and annoying? Link to post Share on other sites
sowhynot Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 It often has 'and I don't want to hurt you' inserted into it as well ! Certainly lacking in imagination, but personally I don't find it insulting or annoying. The word I'd use is 'predictable' - coming usually as it does, after the words 'we need to talk' ... .. . Link to post Share on other sites
Moley87 Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 So Day 2 is here and it's my Birthday what a **** day this is going to be and by god I woke up as bad today I have so many questions to ask on why she lead me on like this its going to be a tough one. belated message here but Bad timing around your birthday but it's just the same as any other day, focus on you spend time with your friends and family and of course celebrate your day ! Hopefully you are now on day 4 of no contact ? just think 3 more days and you've gone a week without the ex - positive is you can live without the ex when at 7 days then set your goal as 14 days ! Be good to see how your doing today if you read this Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby65 Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 I've often said "amazing" is the kiss of death. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
hunk Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 I'd rather be called an absolute-****ing-*******-scum-of-the-earth-pig-piece-of-**** than a "nice" or "amazing" guy. It's seriously one of the worst things a woman can ever describe you as and signifies ZERO, even SUB-ZERO sexual attraction. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 Most women do this because we are trying to be nice & minimize the pain of rejection we are inflicting on somebody else. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
aloneinaz Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 Who cares what the "words" say or don't say. It's the message of "I don't want you in my life anymore" that should make us say "ok sweetie, YOU GOT IT".. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 I always hated it and I never BS people that way. I won't say "you're a f*cking loser" but I'll shoot you pretty straight nonetheless so you at least have something to go on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author biggles6087 Posted May 18, 2015 Author Share Posted May 18, 2015 Or another famous one how about it this I'm so sorry its not you but its me . Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 Or another famous one how about it this I'm so sorry its not you but its me . But it is the speaker of that sentence. That person doesn't want to date you. A decision they made. A feeling they have. It's not something you did or can control. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SoThatHappened Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 Been there, hated that. But, can't blame the ladies. It's not easy to breakup with someone, but the best way is to be 100% completely honest. As in: - "Honestly Roger, there's no spark" - "My ex came back into my life." - "I'm lesbian now." - "You're boring." - "I secretly want to make love to a school boy." Bonus points for those who get that last reference. Honestly, there's no easy way, but yeah, the "you're a nice guy but..." routine makes us guys think so much less of you... whether or not it's warranted. Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 one time when getting fired, my boss was pained to have to fire me. he started with my attributes , then wrapped it up with your fired. Confused at first... then realized he was making good on the fact that I did have those leadership qualities. That hadn't changed. He had to make a choice and realized I would do better in another field... and he was right. so either you can take a ladies comment as an insult or respect it at face value and move on. And you are right, you are not a nice guy if you cant get pass a gentle kind word. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Hawaii51 Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 I'm not sure, OP, but since it happened via text I feel inclined to say something about your grammar. Surely this isn't the only reason, but it definitely matters to a handful of the opposite sex. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 But does anyone else find that text insulting and annoying? Lulz, I had 25 years or so of hearing it in person before text was invented. My personal favorite? Her: 'You really care!' Me: 'Sorry, I'm working on that' Interesting world out there. Link to post Share on other sites
dyna85 Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 My thought is... people should just be honest & tell the truth. Like the blunt honest truth about why they feel the need to break up and be done with it. It's not that hard to be honest and it's not hurtful if it comes from a loving place. As long as there is no 'let's be friends' bs after the fact, or other stringing along maneuvers, it's fine to just be straight up and truthful. I don't get why the need to: a) lie b) be mean/cruel Nice but honest, with no patronizing compliments. Just break it off after the decency of engaging in one final conversation and stay the eff way and let the other person heal. End of story. Link to post Share on other sites
SLee Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 As others have said, it's to assuage guilt. They're rejecting you, telling you they don't want you, so they try to soften the blow with compliments. Problem is that it really doesn't help. And it isn't only women who do it. My ex told me CONSTANTLY how pretty, smart, funny, wonderful, blah blah blah I was but it made it worse for me because if I had all these qualities that he admired, why didn't he want me? I know it's not as simple as that, but that's what I hear when people say these things. I rather someone tell me it's not working out and take responsibility for their feelings and choices. Granted, that's often not a likely possibility. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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