Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 23, 2015 Author Share Posted July 23, 2015 I've been pretty down for the last couple of days but wasn't sure why until tonight. I went to the gym tonight and it went pretty well. I increased weight, exercises and reps so it was a good night. I also had time to think about why my emotions have been so low recently. I heard last week that the other guy's parents were going on vacation (his dad occasionally drives a truck where I work). I'm pretty sure she and the other guy went with them. Family vacations are something we used to do together. I have no proof of that, but you know how the mind can run away with you. It's just another example of them doing things together that we used to do which is pretty damn depressing. I can't wait til the day crap like this doesn't get to me anymore... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 23, 2015 Author Share Posted July 23, 2015 Thanks again to anybody still reading my epic story...lol At this point, my posts are just a kind of catharsis. I plan on going back over this thread one day when I'm over this roller coaster ride (which at this point seems to be a never-ending one) and using it to better myself. Today I'm doing okay (for now). We'll see if that changes. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 25, 2015 Author Share Posted July 25, 2015 (edited) Well, it finally happened. I went out to a bar tonight with some buddies and who should walk in? My ex and her bf. It tore me up for a while...especially when he was staring over where I was at while rubbing her leg. I wanted to kill him so bad, but instead I walked over, shook his hand and talked to her for a while about meaningless stuff. She verified that he doesn't have a job (big surprise) and that she's basically paying for everything. I played it cool and unaffected but I wanted to kiss her SO bad. In the end though, I gave her a big hug (right in front of him, which he hated) and walked away. It hurts right now but not as bad as I thought. Still sucks though...I wanted to smash his smug face in, but I was the bigger man. PS: I'm pretty sure she's not engaged. She wasn't wearing a ring, anyway. Edited July 25, 2015 by Unlucky_I_Guess Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 25, 2015 Author Share Posted July 25, 2015 Really wishing I had stayed away last night. I didn't feel I could though since they both saw me and I didn't want to slink off like it bothered me. Man it does though. Not as bad as day one but bad enough. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 25, 2015 Author Share Posted July 25, 2015 I can't get the image of them together out of my head. She looked happy. It kills me that I was never even given a chance to possibly make her happy myself. I have been crying randomly all day and I'm supposed to meet my family later for my birthday dinner. Just when you think you're moving forward sh*t like this happens. This is the worst birthday ever. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 25, 2015 Author Share Posted July 25, 2015 Anybody have any words of encouragement? I'm really hurting right now. Link to post Share on other sites
wizer Posted July 25, 2015 Share Posted July 25, 2015 What does this breakup have to do with GIGS? She outgrew the relationship, she found someone else, she's happy. That's how it works, more often than not. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 25, 2015 Author Share Posted July 25, 2015 Gee thanks, exactly what I needed. I don't know if it's GIGS or not, but she gave me no signs of being unhappy until the BU. All the things she told me for wanting to break up pointed to it including hopping into this relationship probably before ours even ended. Link to post Share on other sites
wizer Posted July 25, 2015 Share Posted July 25, 2015 They usually have someone on the side before they bail. There were signs there, but you overlooked them. Don't beat yourself up it happens, all the time. In the future, you'll be much more careful. Link to post Share on other sites
ApexTitanium Posted July 25, 2015 Share Posted July 25, 2015 Im 8 months out of a 5.5 year relationship.....I still feel like **** sometimes. You arent alone man. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 27, 2015 Author Share Posted July 27, 2015 I'm not sure why but I've been feeling a sense of peace today. Yesterday I was a wreck, but the more I reflected on seeing her I started to remember things. She was there with her bf and a group of others, but she sat by herself all night messing with her phone. None of the others even talked to her. She always told me she was introverted and didn't like crowds; evidently that hasn't changed. She also wasn't wearing makeup, her hair hadn't been done and her nails weren't either. She used to worry more about her appearance than that. I always felt that she had low self-esteem and it seems she tries to get happiness and friends from her bf instead of from within herself. I, on the other hand, have been using this time to reflect and improve myself both physically and mentally. I've lost weight and have been working out, I've made some great new friends (they had an impromptu b-day party for me today), and I've identified and established barriers for myself. I'm not there yet, but I'm trying hard. I almost feel sorry for her because I can already tell her pattern is repeating. She doesn't realize (maybe someday she will) that true happiness can only come from within, not from someone else. It was a hard lesson for me, but I'm glad I'm finally learning. All in all, it's been a great birthday. Good night, all. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 29, 2015 Author Share Posted July 29, 2015 I've been doing...okay. Fairly good with myself, until about 10 minutes ago. I was leaving home heading back to work from lunch and her car was parked at his parents' house. I feel so many waves of just pure ANGER right now and I'm not sure why. I just hate her so much right now but nothing has changed in the situation for the better or worse. Obviously I've got a long way to go to get over this. "F**K THAT B***H" is a big part of my vocabulary right now. Link to post Share on other sites
Phoenixashes Posted July 29, 2015 Share Posted July 29, 2015 Keep riding the waves. Keep doing things to improve yourself. I'm currently at the anger stage myself mixed with nonchalance. When you are blindsided, it lingers more than a gradual falling apart. Choosing to jump or preparing to do so is easier than stable ground suddenly crumbling beneath you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted July 29, 2015 Share Posted July 29, 2015 I've been doing...okay. Fairly good with myself, until about 10 minutes ago. I was leaving home heading back to work from lunch and her car was parked at his parents' house. I feel so many waves of just pure ANGER right now and I'm not sure why. I just hate her so much right now but nothing has changed in the situation for the better or worse. Obviously I've got a long way to go to get over this. "F**K THAT B***H" is a big part of my vocabulary right now. I'm guessing that you live in a smallish town, am I right? If so, you're going to be subjected to triggers fairly frequently. I hesitate to suggest this, because I don't want to seem like I'm advocating that you let her run you out of town, but is moving a possibility? A fresh start without having her in your path? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted July 30, 2015 Author Share Posted July 30, 2015 I'm guessing that you live in a smallish town, am I right? If so, you're going to be subjected to triggers fairly frequently. I hesitate to suggest this, because I don't want to seem like I'm advocating that you let her run you out of town, but is moving a possibility? A fresh start without having her in your path? I would, but I just bought a house (for me and the ex, ironically) about 2 years ago. So, nope. Lol She moved to another town with the douchebag but they're here a lot due to his parents. Plus his dad works part time where I work. The hits just keep comin'... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted August 3, 2015 Author Share Posted August 3, 2015 So now I hear rumblings that she might be pregnant by this guy. F**k this, I'm done. I would be perfectly happy if I never see her again or hear her name. If she did manage to get herself knocked up then that's the path she chose and I feel no pity for her. Not my problem that she wants to have a kid with a POS unemployed loser. Yeah, I get that I'm still bitter about the whole thing, but I can't help it. I'm to the point now that I wish I had never met her. I don't even remember any good times with her. She's managed to kill that. All I remember is pain and heartbreak. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted August 13, 2015 Author Share Posted August 13, 2015 Well, the rumblings turned out to be truth. Pregnant? After living with the guy for only 3 months? I'm having a really hard time processing this. This woman's insanity just keeps getting worse and worse...I feel really sorry for the environment this child will be raised in. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted August 14, 2015 Author Share Posted August 14, 2015 Well, one more thing to make my life complete. I lost my job today. The year 2015 can kiss my a*s*s. Link to post Share on other sites
bigtrouble Posted August 16, 2015 Share Posted August 16, 2015 (edited) Well, one more thing to make my life complete. I lost my job today. The year 2015 can kiss my a*s*s. Don't let it get to you... I came from a 5yr relationship, cheated on and dumped... 2weeks after the breakup I had to get a new job... I met new people found new friends... The new job kept me busy, not much but it did help a lot... I know you won't be sleeping much nor eating... and you tend to think of her so much and over analyze... Use this extra energy focus on a new job... You are already hurting, fight getup... Its time you help yourself... She will not comeback to take away your pain... nor encourage you anymore to be better... Let your true strength come forward... Help yourself... Tragedy and loss are painful... but they do make us stronger and better... We all went through it... I seen so many do it... I am doing my best too... And I know you can do it too... Edited August 16, 2015 by bigtrouble Link to post Share on other sites
Author Unlucky_I_Guess Posted August 16, 2015 Author Share Posted August 16, 2015 Thanks for the encouraging words. I'm actually eating and sleeping pretty well...I've been hitting the gym almost every day and I'm in the best shape I've been in years. I've made new friends who are pretty supportive of me as well. Life sometimes decides you haven't had enough so it piles on more cr*p. I get that, it just feels like when it rains it pours lately. I have no urge to contact my ex and definitely don't want her back. I've got enough bad mojo in my life without adding her in the mix. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts