'Day after' worries

[RetroMan]

Last night, I went out with three other friends to a nightclub. Two of them have been going out for a while, but the other is single and so am I, so naturally as the other two were all over each other much of the time, it made us two feel a bit uncomfortable. I've fancied this girl for quite a while though and was hoping that we might be able to...well...make our own fun.

 

After a short while the two of us broke off from the other two and went off to another room for different music. Both totally drunk as skunks by this point, within two minutes of being in this room away from them, we found ourselves in each others arms then kissing. I can't remember what I said afterwards but she said that it was inevitable it would happen and we carried on, and then I took her to one of the little segregated booth areas at the side of the room and we sat down in front of each other and got started properly kissing and caressing each other like mad for what must have been a good half hour at very least .

 

During this we would occasionally stop and talk, and she was really sincerely revealing how she felt about me and that she had always really liked me and had been trying to impress me ever since she started (at our job) and thought I was gorgeous. I told her that I had always felt similar, but I never thought she felt that way about me and that I thought she fancied someone else...the other guy who was out with us that night...which she denied and promised that she didn't. I even asked if this was all just drink talking and she promised it wasn't.

 

Anyway, for the rest of the whole night we were hanging off each other constantly and holding hands and kissing whenever we got the chance etc... and it really seemed like she was genuinely into me, and the two who were with us said that they knew she liked me...

 

However, the problem is that today, at work (which is fairly casual work where relationships are fairly common btw) as I predicted might happen, all of the intimacy had gone. We both seemed quite nervous of each other and uncomfortable, and we didn't talk about it at all. This of course leaves me wondering how she really feels. Could she be regretting it? Do you think a girl could really kiss a guy in that way and say things so sincerely like that but, in actual fact, not mean anything by it just because she's very drunk? I'd be really hurt if she regretted it.

 

Also, when we were walking in the street with the two others today during our break between shifts, I asked her how she was and put my arm around her and she did the same to me, and for a short while we were walking arm in arm again, until she suddenly seemed a bit nervous and pulled away. It was then I realised that we had just passed someone we both knew in the street, suggesting that she feels embarrassed for people to start knowing about it or something?

 

I didn't really know what to say to her today either. I didn't know whether she wanted me to steer clear of her or whether she wanted me to start showing her boyfriendy type affection in the way I had last night or what. Somehow it seemed so unnatural for me to just change down gears and behave like nothing had happened. I really really don't want to lose this chance. We've got on so well, especially over the last couple of weeks where she said she'd detected a definite "spark" between us. She's single, I'm single. She's really really beautiful and she says she fancies me too but I just feel so awkward right now that I can't relax and be natural.

 

How does this sound to you though? It's not like she's ignoring me completely, but we just both seem a bit unsure of each other. At the end of work tonight I gave her my number on a piece of paper because she doesn't already have it, and I said "just in case" and looked her in the eye and she seemed pleased and smiled with a bit of a glint her eye...although said she's out of phone credit at the moment (which is true...and she is very short of cash right now) but would see me at work on Tuesday.

 

What should I do now? I really really don't want to screw up this one because I think there is real potential. I really like her alot and she seems to like me too, but we've just hit a barrier here and it's SO frustrating! And could a girl be that sincere but actually just be bull****ting someone they know quite well just because they're drunk and wanted a bit of drunken fun?

[faux]

Maybe she is so awkward because the two of you work together. If you can talk to her in private again, be sure to ask her what is really the issue. Is it that she is not interested in you, or is she interested in you, but uncertain of things because the both of you work together?

 

Starting up relationships with people in the workplace usually does not work out so well.

[RetroMan]

Originally posted by faux Starting up relationships with people in the workplace usually does not work out so well.

 

It does make things a little awkward, but honestly, where I work relationships are really really common. I'm 21 and she's 18 and everyone else is around our age. We're ushers in a theatre (playhouse) and nearly everyone has had a thing with at least one other member of staff at some point . It's a very very relaxed atmosphere.

[RetroMan]

I'd also like to know if you think it sounds promising? Someone said to me once that most girls differ from alot of men in that they still have to fancy a guy if they were to kiss him when drunk...and I got over two hours worth! I'd really love to believe that.

 

I'd also like to know how you think I should be behaving towards her. I think she knows I've never had a gf before, so I hope she understands that I'm just shy. A friend said to me that she thinks she may not realise that I'm as into her as she is me because my shyness hides it.

 

I'd hate to let this slip just because neither of us knows what the other is thinking. I absolutely hate awkward things like that! It's such a waste of time when we could be getting on with having fun and some sort of life together. She may be worried for the same reasons as me...that I didn't really mean the things I said. I just want to tell her how much I like her, whilst sober, without coming on too strong and serious.

 

Godammit...I'm really head over heels after the other night!