pippen_2k Posted April 24, 2005 Share Posted April 24, 2005 At the moment Ive been sleeping with my EX Girlfriend, who dumped me in early January... Not untill like 3 weeks ago, I hadnt seen or heard from her once ( besides a few text messages ) She rang out of the blue one day, and decided to come visit me. The next day we done dinner and about 1 week later we started having sex. She has come over like 3 times now... It seems to me that Ive become her booty call! I still have feelings for this girl, but im trying to block them feelings out and just enjoy the Sex. Whenever I try to initiate the meeting I can find myself without a reply for like over a day, but whenever she messages me Im always there ASAP! I know it sounds pathetic, but I really am there for her beckoning it seems... The first few days after we had sex I was the happiest man alive! Even tho my friends said be carefull and dont hurt urself.. I said it was all cool..its just sex and that maybe this was all I was missing.... hmmm Im thinking Im wrong now... Ive found myself today occupying my mind and thoughts on her all damn day! And im starting to realise that it is more than the sex that im missing.. I miss her company too....and its causing a little hurt and anxiety waiting for her reply's. I look at it like this.. Things have slowly started progressing between us.. like for months no contact, then she rang me one day, then started visiting me, and now we are sleeping together again... Should I look at this as im a chance of getting back with her or just take it as im satisfying her needs? I dunno.. we havnt mentioned anything about us or relationships since we started sleeping together, even tho we hold each other after sex and she says to me that she does miss me. Any suggestions? I dont really wanna cut the ties now.. I wanna see if theres any chance here... Im acting all cool and not messaging her all the time either Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted April 24, 2005 Share Posted April 24, 2005 Cut the ties, man. You're just her boy toy until she finds a new boyfriend. Link to post Share on other sites
Marshbear Posted April 24, 2005 Share Posted April 24, 2005 Originally posted by westernxer Cut the ties, man. You're just her boy toy until she finds a new boyfriend. I agree. Dump her. She'll just hurt you again... Link to post Share on other sites
XNemesisX Posted April 24, 2005 Share Posted April 24, 2005 This is how my ex and I got back together the last time we broke up. FWB doesn't work when one of the two people still has feelings. BUT it is how my ex and I started our relationship back up again. Notice that I said ex because we broke up again 6 months later. I would advise against being her sex slave and flying over there like a bat out of hell every time she calls. She will lose respect for you. Also, I hate to sound like a pessimist but rarely ever does reconciliations last. You may end up like me and going through the turmoil of a break up for about the 3rd time from the SAME person. Don't do that to yourself if you can help it. Link to post Share on other sites
mixwell Posted April 24, 2005 Share Posted April 24, 2005 the way i see it is at least your getting laid !! haha I wish I could even have that with my ex.. I have gotten laid since we broke up (5-6 months ago) I havent even kissed a girl on the lips since then.. haha i seriously need to get laid but thats another story... I know what you mean though man.. You should just tell her the deal man honestly.. Maybe after you have sex though because if it all goes to hell you never know when the next time you will get laid will be so get it while you can.. haha ... Take care man Peace Link to post Share on other sites
sanne Posted April 24, 2005 Share Posted April 24, 2005 DONT DO IT MAN.....PLEASE DON'T DO IT!!!!!! I just went through what you are going through now, only to find that my ex was also seeing her ex-bf before me at the same time. She is not looking for a relationship, she just wants sex. She does not want a relationship with you. Even after all of our advice you are still going to see her, don't worry we all made that same mistake. I think the only way people learn in these type of situations is by going through it all themselves, nobody listens to the advice given especially when they are distraught about their ex. All I can say is that right now, things are a nightmare. My ex has suicidal thoughts and is suffering from deep depression, and i'm still in shock after the nightmare that was our relationship. But life goes on you know, I've come to realize that my ex is not the last person i'll ever love. There are so many more women out there for you, don't make the mistake we've all made. I only pray that you can realize this before things get too bad. Link to post Share on other sites
Author pippen_2k Posted April 24, 2005 Author Share Posted April 24, 2005 Thanks for the replies, and your comments are kinda what I expected to hear. Only like 10 mins after I posted this thread, the ex messaged me to see what I was doing this afternoon... and me being the fool I am.. kinda said she could come over.. dang! OK I will make this the last time, I just need 1 more sexual encounter with her lol. I had too laugh at ur comments Mixwell.. I suppose I can say im still getting laid! lol ! But its the time where days go past and I dont hear from her that makes it hurt. She obviously dosent have any feeling towards me otherwise we would be doing things together and hanging out, but all we do is have sex, then she leaves.... which some dudes at work say is awsome, but they dont really know how I feel towards her. Like sanne said, even tho u know the advice u guys give is correct, u keep falling into the trap of doing the opposite.. hence keep going back to her. I will learn.. obviously its gonna be the hard way. Link to post Share on other sites
Author pippen_2k Posted April 24, 2005 Author Share Posted April 24, 2005 Im a fool! She told me at lunch time today that she would call me and catch up with me later in the day! .. and of course she is a no show... I get all excited and anticipate for her to arrive and message me, and she hasnt.. I should be used to this... still f**ks me up a little tho... Its after 7PM now... I guess she has decided not to come! I aint gonna ring her or message her tho.. f**k it! Link to post Share on other sites
mixwell Posted April 24, 2005 Share Posted April 24, 2005 Its hard i know !! im just joking about the sex thing.. I mean it is a pleasure to have from someone you love but still there isnt that connection and i know sex isn't the only thing.. I miss having someone there to talk to and share the things we did... It tears me up inside.. I havent really talked to my ex really.. except my mom left a letter for her at her house and it sounded kind of mean I guess but it was intended to sound that way.. yesterday morning my ex called my phone from work abot 30 times !! I didnt answer.. My mom had told me this and I knew thats the only reason my ex called.. well i called back because i didnt want her to be calling all day.. She asked about the letter and i set things straight.. We didn't even talk about anything personal or anything and i just said I had to go. She sounded a little bummed.. Even though its been like 5-6 months since our breakup I am not over her and things were going OK not too bad until my mom did that.. Now my ex is on my mind like crazy and I really want to call her and let her know how I feel but I dont know.. Sorry Im not trying to jack your thread but i just had to vent a little.. Anyways tell her straight up how you feel.. The sooner you find out whats going on for sure the sooner you will be able to move on or reconcile. Take care, Peace Link to post Share on other sites
Ty Posted April 24, 2005 Share Posted April 24, 2005 Whenever I try to initiate the meeting I can find myself without a reply for like over a day, but whenever she messages me Im always there ASAP! I know it sounds pathetic, but I really am there for her beckoning it seems... Next time she calls you, tell her you have something else to do. People want what they can't have.. don't be there for her beckoning.. she dumped you, it should be your call as to when and if you all should hang out or whatever. Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedInOC Posted April 24, 2005 Share Posted April 24, 2005 Agree, cut the ties. Tell her you want to be more than just a booty call. If she doesn't want to be, then end it. No sense in her playing with your head like that. I know my Ex is going to try and pull this on me at some time too. But if she can't be my companion, I don't want her. Link to post Share on other sites
mental_traveller Posted April 26, 2005 Share Posted April 26, 2005 You're getting played - you care, she doesn't, so she can manipulate you to satisfy her wants, whereas you don't get to satisfy yours. There are two possible solutions to dealing with a player - cut off all contact, or play them back. Playing them back requires you to stop having any emotional feelings towards them though. So in your case I would say just ditch her and don't respond in future, no matter how much she pleads. And if you weaken and meet up again, make sure you do so on *your* terms. So refuse her initial suggestion outright, and say maybe you can meet later in the week. On the plus side, being a booty call means at least she thinks you're good in bed! It could be worse! Link to post Share on other sites
Author pippen_2k Posted April 26, 2005 Author Share Posted April 26, 2005 Yeah, all good advice, but like most in this forum I continue to go against everything I know is right and still try to hook up with this girl. Even tho she stood me up on Sunday, I tried again to see her last night, and yet again I get another excuse saying she was busy. She is very very very strange! One day she is messaging me telling me how much she wants me, the next she acts extremely distant propobably realising that what she is doing is wrong. Its almost 2am in the morning right now and I cant sleep, cause she is causing me pain again. Ive tried almost everything to get back with her, and tried many times to meet up. Im just getting nothing in return! Only sex when SHE wants it. Some guys would love this, but im left feeling very empty at the end of the day. Why I try soo hard for this very stubborn girl is beyond me? Anyways im heading away for 4 weeks on Saturday where I will be having no contact with her what so ever, as I cant even take a phone, as there is no electricity...Nothing! This will probably be a good chance to gather my thoughts and hopefully realise that what im doing is stupid. Im getting really tired of hurting myself with this girl. Im looking for something that really isnt there. I thought now that she is talking to me again, and now sleeping with me, somthing was gonna happen again between us. But nope.... She hasnt changed much at all.. im still getting avoided and still getting lame ass excuses! I just wanna enjoy the sex with no emotions involved.. obviously too soon for that! Heres to learning the hard way! Link to post Share on other sites
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