So, if a woman doesn't know how to carry on a conversation, that's a dealbreaker?

[central]

For me, a woman has to be able to carry on a conversation. I don't mean small talk, as that's only useful for casual social situations and initial introductions, IMO. I want someone who can talk about meaningful and abstract topics and concepts. The rest of the time it's great if she's obscene and not heard!

[Eternal Sunshine]

Yeah, it is very important. I am not a big talker and that has greatly hindered me in dating. I have many interests but am introverted so early dating is pretty awkward for me.

 

Typically women that always have boyfriends are extroverted, bubbly and can talk about anything. Looks are less important.

[JuneJulySeptember]

Yeah, it is very important. I am not a big talker and that has greatly hindered me in dating. I have many interests but am introverted so early dating is pretty awkward for me.

 

Typically women that always have boyfriends are extroverted, bubbly and can talk about anything. Looks are less important.

 

I've said it before but one of the major factors in success of a woman in landing a LTR is "not being a bitch". Looks of course, is #1, but so is it for everybody.

 

I know a number of men who married women because they were laid back when they could have had more attractive and even more successful women. The women I know who are type A and on the anal side have some troubles. And I'm not just saying that. A woman very close to me fits that description.

 

A woman I work with is fairly attractive (definitely above average), but most of the guys don't like her because she is aggressive and rolls over people.

[hotpotato]

Yeah, it is very important. I am not a big talker and that has greatly hindered me in dating. I have many interests but am introverted so early dating is pretty awkward for me.

 

Typically women that always have boyfriends are extroverted, bubbly and can talk about anything. Looks are less important.

 

IA. Looks and smarts are less important. Being extroverted and bubbly are number one, provided she is not a 2 or 3. Many women who are not particularly attractive are married BUT they are often quite bubbly.

[Satu]

um.....er......ah........mm..............er...um...?

[ZA Dater]

Is this true for guys? Say, a guy finds a girl attractive that he does small talk...and the girl does small talk-also finds the guy attractive and the talk is just talk and she leaves it up for him to do the talking because she wants to be chased. Well, isn't that what guys are suppose to do-chase women regardless if the convo is boring? I've been told that the reason why I can't find anyone is because I don't "talk" to guys. Number one-I never get approached. If a guy talks to me-I talk, but I don't push for a flirty conversation. Is conversation really important? Sounds like b.s. Because if guy wants me, he will want me, no matter what. I never thought I have to work this hard to get a guy. Looks are the only thing that matters.

 

For me a conversation is vital, I don't care if she is a model. If she cannot communicate well, cannot articulate well, speaks poorly, lacks general knowledge then the whole lot is an instant turn off for me, despite any appealing physical attributes she may have.

 

This have a rather radical side effect on the guy because when you start to put a premium on intellect you start to truly realise as I have how few people do: speak well, have general knowledge and are able to talk about meaningful things.

[ZA Dater]

As a side note on this, the notion that all men have to use some strategy to get women to talk about themselves is silly. I mean, it may work for some shallow women, but guess what, most women are't shallow and dumb and self-obsessed. That means you'd better be ready to have a two way conversation where you're able to put forth thoughts of your own and elaborate on them, not just say "oh yeah, what else?" You'll fall flat pretty quickly doing that, in general.

 

I will comment on this, if that's you in your avatar then I don't imagine it would be difficult to have a pick of guys. Where I disagree with the above is I have been on dates, the vast majority of which I had to sit there make conversation and wasn't once asked about myself.

 

Where I agree is that lets face it many guys don't have intellectual ability, they are more interested in the physical side but the irony is there are just as many females who want not only for intellectual ability but also want in just basic knowledge.

 

Looks give you a head start and allow you to choose from a greater pool of people, if one is average looking then the pool is far more limited.

[loveweary11]

Not a deal breaker at all.

 

Just like men, many women are shy and self conscious.

 

If their heart is in the right place and and they are a good person inside, I just coax them out of their shell.

 

Lots of women are like this. When they finally come clean about being shy, I say, "don't worry, I'll talk enough for both of us... :lmao:" This usually relaxes them right away and they feel less self conscious.

 

I can always get shy girls to open up. In fact, I find it kind of fun.

 

So yea, I'll take the ones rejected for not having conversation skills.

Edited May 25, 2015 by loveweary11

[ZA Dater]

Not a deal breaker at all.

 

Just like men, many women are shy and self conscious.

 

If their heart is in the right place and and they are a good person inside, I just coax them out of their shell.

 

Lots of women are like this. When they finally come clean about being shy, I say, "don't worry, I'll talk enough for both of us... :lmao:" This usually relaxes them right away and they feel less self conscious.

 

I can always get shy girls to open up. In fact, I find it kind of fun.

 

So yea, I'll take the ones rejected for not having conversation skills.

 

Conversation skills are one thing, a dire lack of intellect is something else entirely.

[loveweary11]

Conversation skills are one thing, a dire lack of intellect is something else entirely.

 

I find women with a dire lack of intellect are usually the ones talking the most.

[ZA Dater]

I find women with a dire lack of intellect are usually the ones talking the most.

 

Yes about inane nonsense usually. This scenario becomes all the worse when they aren't particularly good looking either.

[salparadise]

Where I agree is that lets face it many guys don't have intellectual ability, they are more interested in the physical side but the irony is there are just as many females who want not only for intellectual ability...

 

I am at a loss for words, and the ability to think too, apparently... good thing zadater is alive and can do all our thinking for us.