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Is it good idea to contact my ex after 7 months apart


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Mizz Layta

Its been 7 months since the last time we spoke.We broke up because of distance and he met someone else closer at the end.I decided to cut off contact so I can move on.However,I haven't really dated anyone since which is fine with me.

 

 

He has been on my mind lately and I am contemplating texting him just to see how he is but I am not sure if its good idea because it might bring back the old feelings and I was jealous when he told me he met someone new.Now i don't care anyone but I am not sure if I would jealous if they still together and going strong.

 

 

I am just not sure if I should just let the urge pass?What could go wrong if I contact him?

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Mrlonelyone

If the root cause of the breakup, distance, hasn't been resolved then no. Move on. There is someone nearby who will date you. You may not be in a dating frame of mind and so haven't noticed the attention.

 

My theory is that everyone has at least one person they're not dating/in a RL ship with who would like to be with them. It is just a question of if both of you are available and on the same page.

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Mizz Layta

Well,I have had a crush on someone but nothing came out of it and I found the dude actually has gf.My love life sucks lol :(

I am not contacting him to get back together since I know the distance will still be an issue ,just to say hi but I am scared it might bring the old feelings back

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Ijustdon'tgetit
I am not contacting him to get back together since I know the distance will still be an issue ,just to say hi but I am scared it might bring the old feelings back

 

Listen to you gut feeling. You may feel lonely now due to your bad luck with dating. You may be thinking contact with him may make you happy once more but you will develop feelings and be disappointed. Be honest with yourself, you hope for something.

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I think you have to understand why you want to contact him. You said you just want to see how he is doing. But what do you really hope to gain from that knowledge? What's the point? Exes aren't like friends where you can catch up every now and then. It just never works that way.

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To add to the already good advice above:

 

Yes, it WILL absolutely bring all your feelings back. As others have said, you need to really think long and hard about what positive thing you could get out of contact with him. It will bring all the jealousy and pain back, I can guarantee that.

 

The urge will pass. There's no point in contacting him that I can tell.

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If the root cause of the breakup, distance

 

Distance is not the root cause of the breakup. Someone else is.

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Mizz Layta

UPDATE:

I thought about this more and I now decided not to contact my ex.Deep down I knew that it wasn't a good idea but I just wanted to hear other people take on it.I might end up start expecting for something more than just catching up

 

I was crushed when he told me that he met someone new .It was one of the reasons why I decided to cut off contact because it was painful knowing that he was connecting with another girl and kissing her and taking her out etc while I am still single.

 

 

We got back in touch months prior and we were planning to meet up but the plans kept falling through due to conflicting scedules.Then he lost his job and coudnt afford to come visit me.Then he got distance that's when I find out he met someone else closer .Even though I understood that he needs someone closer to him but It a shock and terrible knowing someone was taking my place. Maybe it was just my ego that was hurt :p

 

cliffs

-Op thought it over and decided not contact her ex because

-We are still 4 hours apart and nothing has changed

-I was crushed and jealous when he told me that he met someone new

-I could open old wounds again and have old feelings to come back

-I don't know if I would handle it if he still with the same girl and going strong or worse if they are moving in together or he got her pregnant. I don't think I will handle hearing that

- There’s anything to be gained by contacting him,

 

-I could set myself for more heartache

 

 

-Basically the potential cons outweighed the pros and I decided to pass

 

I guess I was just feeling nostalgic and needed to be reminded why I should move on

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mystikmind2005

Just to be a bit contrary here.... my instinct is that it would actually be a good idea!

 

why? Simple answer; to test yourself.

 

If you can cope well with contacting him then you know you have the necessary emotional strength and stability to get on with your life....

 

So you will either get a nice little confidence booster or discover you have more work to do.

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