adult adhd & getting things done

[merrmeade]

Can't find much on this on LS so thought I'd throw out a net and see who finds it:

 

Adult ADHD. Lots to say about it but would like to focus on getting things done. Really prefer responses from people who understand it, respect it, realize it has nothing to do with emotional and/or intellectual intelligence.

 

When all is said and done, when little motivates - neither fear, status, opinion or love - to do the needful, what works? Novelty and interest are key to adhd "success" (ie, accomplishment) in terms of 'normal world' expectations. When it's necessary to participate in the normal world, what do people with these issues do (that works) to get things done? ie, the mundane, inherently uninteresting things like cleaning the house, doing the bills, organizing papers. the mundane that kills...

 

Repeat: If you don't have it, if you haven't had it a long time, if you haven't studied it, you won't get it and you won't help (so thanks in advance for not criticizing of scratching your head in public incredulity - don't need that

[Jessie1231]

My family doctor diagnosed me with adhd a few years back. I thought she was crazy, but I agreed I try medication anyway and oh my goodness. It changed my entire life. I was never able to finish anything before then. It wasn't that I was lazy, it's that I would start something then get distracted and start another, etc. I had always done well with school and work, but I never realized how much more productive I could be if I actually focused.

 

I've been on several different meds as I seem to build a tolerance and need to change every year or so, but medication has changed the way I do things. I now have so much more focus and energy about tasks. From housework to regular work, I'm able to concentrate and do what I need to do to finish things. It's wonderful.

[hotpotato]

What helps? Last minute panic. Lol

 

I believe I have adhd along with other issues.

[GoldieLox]

My husband has had it since he was 10 years old. He has a 142 IQ and is identified as being gifted, yet it was so severe that he almost failed out of middle school until they got him on proper medication. He was on and off of it over the years, until he decided to go back to college about two years ago, and decided to get back on it full time.

 

His functioning is painfully impaired when he is not on his medication. His driving record is crap because of his impulsiveness, getting him to do things is virtually impossible (I find myself having to ask him to do the same thing about 14 times a day), and he's just flighty in general. Even on his medication, his attention span is not that of a non-ADHD person, though it's definitely improved. He also had anger issues when he was younger as a result of the disorder. Those have since improved with a bit of therapy and the hard work on his part.

 

Unfortunately for him, the only thing that works is medication and me getting on him. I take care of paying the bills and things like that, but that's just because I'm an OCD Type A control freak and insist on doing it (we make a wonderful pair, we do). If we divorced, I have no doubt he'd be able to handle it, but he'd literally have to set alarms on his phone, his calender, and have lists of payment dates and reminders all around the house.

 

I also studied this extensively in grad school. Any specific questions I can try and help out with?

[m4p]

I didn't realized it before but it has been slowly dawning on me recently that I need some help in this area and I might have adult adhd.

 

There has been troubles with focusing, impulsiveness as well as awful time management (even up till now).... It's like I KNOW what I need to do, but I can't seem to be able to push myself to do it (it could be something totally trivial or something really important). Major anxiety as well.

 

Am thinking of consulting a doctor. What should I expect if I am properly and officially diagnosed with adult adhd?

 

Ps: sorry to be asking questions here but I thought it will be nice to learn from people who had personal or close encounters with this issue.

[GoldieLox]

 

Am thinking of consulting a doctor. What should I expect if I am properly and officially diagnosed with adult adhd?

 

I'd suggest consulting an actual psychiatrist. Many people go to their primary care doctor to be diagnosed with ADHD, depression, anxiety, etc, and I'm sorry, but I just don't agree with that. Psychiatrists deal with mental illness all day every day, so I find them to be much more knowledgeable when it comes to proper medication prescribing and diagnosing. I used to cringe when my old clients told me they get their medications from their GPs. They tended to have a lot more trouble. That's absolutely nothing personal against GPs.

 

Having said that, the doctor will ask you a bunch of questions about your symptoms and how they relate to your everyday life (work, school, home, etc) and make a determination about whether you have ADHD. Then, he'll probably make a recommendation about medication (especially if you're in the US, they're stimulant happy here, but I see that you're not). If you don't have it severely enough, I'd suggest trying without them first and seeing how it goes.

 

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is often used a therapeutic approach for ADHD. In the past few years, there's been several programs designed for ADHD specifically. They focus on practical exercises. Usually an exercise is assigned, and in the next session, discussed. If the exercise wasn't completed, the therapist and client will try and determine why and change those thinking patterns and apply more useful ones to everyday tasks. A lot of it targets time management and organization.

[m4p]

I'd suggest consulting an actual psychiatrist. Many people go to their primary care doctor to be diagnosed with ADHD, depression, anxiety, etc, and I'm sorry, but I just don't agree with that. Psychiatrists deal with mental illness all day every day, so I find them to be much more knowledgeable when it comes to proper medication prescribing and diagnosing. I used to cringe when my old clients told me they get their medications from their GPs. They tended to have a lot more trouble. That's absolutely nothing personal against GPs.

 

Oops I think you got me wrong.. I said on the other thread that my GP will be able to get me a referral to a psychiatrist which can be covered under insurance. Never doubted for a second that help like this needs to be sought from a proper psychiatrist and not a GP. God knows all the vague diagnosis and scares I had from GPs over the years.

 

Thanks for the outline.. It's helpful and leads me to better anticipate what would be the usual course of action if I were to be really diagnosed. Was really affected at work which led to a terrible consequence, which in turn led me to properly question why do I do things the way I do. Thank you Goldie.

[m4p]

Also, is there a "level" of adult ADHD that can be diagnosed? Eg. Mild or severe..etc. Or is it a strict you either have it or you don't, kinda thing?

[GoldieLox]

Oops I think you got me wrong.. I said on the other thread that my GP will be able to get me a referral to a psychiatrist which can be covered under insurance. Never doubted for a second that help like this needs to be sought from a proper psychiatrist and not a GP. God knows all the vague diagnosis and scares I had from GPs over the years.

 

Thanks for the outline.. It's helpful and leads me to better anticipate what would be the usual course of action if I were to be really diagnosed. Was really affected at work which led to a terrible consequence, which in turn led me to properly question why do I do things the way I do. Thank you Goldie.

 

I hadn't even read your reply on the other thread yet I was just throwing it out there for general advice. Of course, I have met some people over the years who trust their GP with their entire lives and then some and absolutely disagree with my view on this topic, which is fine. I'm not saying every GP is dense when it comes to mental illness haha.

 

My husband made some 'oops' at work, too. That was one of the reasons he got back on his medication. It took a lot of convincing at first, but he finally did it and doesn't regret it for a second.

 

Out of curiosity, when did you start to realize these symptoms? They could also be contributed to severe emotional distress, and I know you're going through a lot right now. When we are upset, our minds go haywire.

[GoldieLox]

Also, is there a "level" of adult ADHD that can be diagnosed? Eg. Mild or severe..etc. Or is it a strict you either have it or you don't, kinda thing?

 

Officially, no. According to the DSM/ICD, you either have it or you don't. There's some unofficial agreement among practitioners however that there are definitely different levels of severity. Some can get on in life without medication. Some cannot. I have seen cases where the kid just has difficulties in school, to cases where the kid was so impulsive, he ran out in traffic (he also had other underlying issues, but you get the point)

[m4p]

Out of curiosity, when did you start to realize these symptoms? They could also be contributed to severe emotional distress, and I know you're going through a lot right now. When we are upset, our minds go haywire.

 

I get where you're coming from with this question... I can't deny that I'm emotionally vulnerable right now with lots on my plate. Especially susceptible to stress and anxiety too.

 

Didn't have much outward problems when I was young but since young I realized that I tend to procrastinate a lot and find it hard to focus. It wasn't that bad because I always somehow managed to pass my exams with last minute studying, but it's only getting more evident in the past few years that I seem to have problem with time management and priorities... It's like I have a plan to do something but I just cannot seem to get it done promptly. Lots of procrastinating.. I am seriously a super procrastinator... Impulsiveness in decisions (the A was probably one of that lol.) and then all these leads back to anxiety because sometimes things blows out of proportion. I can work brilliantly at the very last minute (deadlines.. Etc) that's the only time I feel that I could focus. Do you know what I mean?

 

I am always very very susceptible to instant gratification in almost everything, even if the tradeoffs are high. I always just thought that this is my character so I didn't think much of it.

 

It only took the recent episode at work (and I was too busy to think about xAP then so I think the events were mutually exclusive) and that I should probably seek help.

 

Partly why I didn't really think much of it previously was because I felt that my negative traits with all these bad time management etc. was simply my character and I was embarrassed about it. Never thought of it to be possibly a mental disorder. Only when I read more about it and it seriously resonates with my lifestyle and way of handling things.

 

If it can help me before my life spiral out of control and into disaster I'll be very much relived and willing to put in the effort and work to help myself.

[GoldieLox]

I think seeing someone for an evaluation is definitely a good idea. Evaluations also rule things out. I'm not totally convinced ADHD is the issue at hand, but I'm just going by what you wrote. Obviously I don't know you in real life, and seeing a doc IRL is definitely the best way to go! (I vowed to leave this profession behind anyway. I hated it )

 

In the meantime, if you're having a lot of difficulties with time management, try a simple planner. Try mapping your day out first and setting some deadlines. For example, if you know you have XYZ to do for work by Friday, but you start writing your daily activities out, you may find that today you only have time to do X and Y. You may have to save Z for tomorrow. When people try and get everything done at once and btie off more than they can handle in the allotted time period, they frustrate themselves which leads to anxiety and more procrastination.

[digdug75]

Can't find much on this on LS so thought I'd throw out a net and see who finds it:

 

Adult ADHD. Lots to say about it but would like to focus on getting things done. Really prefer responses from people who understand it, respect it, realize it has nothing to do with emotional and/or intellectual intelligence.

 

When all is said and done, when little motivates - neither fear, status, opinion or love - to do the needful, what works? Novelty and interest are key to adhd "success" (ie, accomplishment) in terms of 'normal world' expectations. When it's necessary to participate in the normal world, what do people with these issues do (that works) to get things done? ie, the mundane, inherently uninteresting things like cleaning the house, doing the bills, organizing papers. the mundane that kills...

 

Repeat: If you don't have it, if you haven't had it a long time, if you haven't studied it, you won't get it and you won't help (so thanks in advance for not criticizing of scratching your head in public incredulity - don't need that

 

I have had the non-hyperactive form of ADHD/ADD throughout my entire life. As a kid I was told I had a learning disorder not getting the ADHD/ADD diagnosis. Little was really understood at that time. After school I was tested and received the diagnosis of ADHD/ADD. A little over 20 years later I still deal with this issue.

 

 

What I have noticed is food plays an important role in managing my symptoms. I also take medication which has its pro's and con's. Cognitive therapy I believe would work well, if I was able to remember to apply technics. Sometimes I think it would be necessary for me to have a drill Sargent next to me directing me one way or another. I say this because stress causes me to act, if that makes any sense. I have been through therapy for a long time. I feel that I have been given all the information possible to get past these difficulties I have. I had considered getting a Coach to help me through the stumbling blocks I have.

 

 

Maybe this will help maybe it won't, but I will post this about me incase it might help

 

 

What I have noticed about me. My problems with focus are with reading, chores around the house, paying attention to when someone talks, and having a consistent routine(basically). I can daydream a lot. Things I can focus on are, video games, sometimes television more so movies than t.v., and things a put off until the last minute.

 

 

There is a controversy about food additives and its effect on ADHD/ADD. To me it is just lack of studies. I remember when I was younger and they had this drink that came in a plastic bottle called squeeze-its. I would drink those constantly, but started getting these horrible migraine headaches. Visited a doctor he had asked my mother if I have been getting any excessive artificial coloring or flavoring in my diet. The answer was yes. We cut those drinks out of my life, and wouldn't you know. No more migraine headaches. This had lead me to a Book written by Dr. Ben Feingold, and his theory on food additives. I had spent a year on the diet without meds, and only applying the diet. I had just moved to a new place at this point and was starting college again to enter a new career. I was able to study get things done such as studying to a degree. I stop at this point unless you have a question.

 

 

I have found that a routine helps me, but I tend to fall out of routine. Sometimes I find that my own thoughts cripple me. For example household chores. I know the amount of time it will take to get things done and tend to put those chores off till it absolutely has to be done. I have tried telling myself consistently "do it now or it will never get done", that has help, but again I fall out of this practice for one reason or another. Exercising help also. I would exercise and use the motivation to get things done around the house. Worked well for me! My exercise of choice was riding mountain bike or running. I would still be doing a diet based on raw foods and if I had the money use some herbs and forms of vitamins that I have researched. Now I live in an area where variety of food is limited and not ripened from plant. I have been trying to figure out how to harness my last minute nature and apply this at will. Still working on that one.

 

 

Good luck to you and I hope maybe you have gotten one thing out of my post. If not, oh well I tried.

[spiderowl]

Can't find much on this on LS so thought I'd throw out a net and see who finds it:

 

Adult ADHD. Lots to say about it but would like to focus on getting things done. Really prefer responses from people who understand it, respect it, realize it has nothing to do with emotional and/or intellectual intelligence.

 

When all is said and done, when little motivates - neither fear, status, opinion or love - to do the needful, what works? Novelty and interest are key to adhd "success" (ie, accomplishment) in terms of 'normal world' expectations. When it's necessary to participate in the normal world, what do people with these issues do (that works) to get things done? ie, the mundane, inherently uninteresting things like cleaning the house, doing the bills, organizing papers. the mundane that kills...

 

Repeat: If you don't have it, if you haven't had it a long time, if you haven't studied it, you won't get it and you won't help (so thanks in advance for not criticizing of scratching your head in public incredulity - don't need that

 

I'd suggest setting up the environment so there is as little distraction as possible - turning off TV, phones, overly bright or flashing lights, computer. Making sure you've had a light snack at least to avoid going off track on a search for food. Then, breaking the job down into small components and tackling one at a time. If you fizzle out or go off track, at least part of it will have been done, which increases confidence too.

 

My daughter got very good at doing spreadsheets to track different things that needed to be done. Somehow, this helped her to focus on a task. I think it took the pressure off her mind and having to juggle it all in her head. She could give herself tasks step by step and tick them off when done.

 

Feeling distracted and chaotic, regardless of external circumstances, does seem to be a major part of the problem and I suppose accepting that that's going to happen and working round it in bits might be better than trying to force yourself to remain focused for long.

 

Oh, one final thing, when my daughter was very tiny and I became aware there was something amiss because of her behaviour, I noticed that it became infinitely worse if she hadn't had a drink for a while. Whereas people would normally get thirsty but still be able to function until they got a drink, she became chaotic, randomly messed things up, generally became extremely badly behaved and even ran off into dangerous situations. I really had to struggle to control her for her own safety! Once she'd had a drink, she seemed to recover and became altogether easier to cope with. I don't know if you've ever noticed any connection with needing a drink?

Edited June 6, 2015 by spiderowl