I think I'm growing away from my best friends

[PersonaPersona]

My best friend group consists of 4 people, including me. I am a guy, and the rest are girls. I am 17, and the others are either 19 or 20.

 

We have all been friends since my Sophomore year of high school, I am now a Senior, and they are now entering their 3rd year of college. Since then, things haven't been the way they used to be.

 

These days, all they talk about is sex, getting drunk, and their broken relationships. Anything else is out of their interest. If I mention me moving away to college, they get mad at me for making the choice to move away. I don't ever feel a sense of encouragement, or a push to succeed from them.

 

I remember one time they came over my house to hang out and I wasn't in the mood because of something that recently happened. I remember crying in bed and they just left me to go hang out in some other part of my house, using my computer, laughing, singing, dancing, and eating the food in my house. The only time they came to "check up" on me was to ask if they should leave or not. I was literally left crying.

 

Later that day, I apologized for getting emotional and excusing myself, and they just said they were "worried".

 

I feel like I am being irrational, but I never feel good after hanging out with them. I just feel deprived from hearing about their sex lives in detail or their stupid choices about getting drunk. The advice I give them to take care of themselves is pretty much useless since they never listen. I can give them all the empathy and a shoulder to cry on, but all I get are one-liners.

 

Am I in over my head?

[preraph]

Since you're youngest, they probably don't take your advice seriously. Not like anyone their ages takes hardly anyone's advice seriously anyway! That is the age to make mistakes in love and to party. If you're going to do it, that's the time to do it, and most people do it.

 

Your friendships will change as you get older. You'll leave some behind and some will get too busy for you. And it always is hurtful. No matter how good the excuse, it's terribly hurtful to realize someone just doesn't want to make a place in their life for you anymore. All I can advise is enjoy them as long as you can. But if it isn't fun anymore, do other things, but do try to be responsible about staying in touch and seeing how everyone is doing. You have to be ready for changes in friendships and losing time and all that. As long as someone isn't intentionally trying to be hurtful, try to be flexible about it and realize they will hopefully come back around one of these days. But if it gets too one-sided, well, sometimes that is the death knell.