Email from estranged sister guilt-tripping me

[makeithappen]

Hello all,

 

 

so today I had an awful day at uni, and to make things worse, my younger sister sends me an email using my university email address.

To cut things short, she titled the email "your mum". She did not ask me how I was. She started with "listen your mum told me to pass on this message..." She then related to me that mum is abroad because my uncle died and the wife of another uncle died too, and my mum might be next. She then said "you should at least give your respect". She then said that because I chose my way, I'm going to suffer and God will punish me and is not happy that I upset my mum. She advised me to say sorry and that I'm spoilt.

 

THIS IS COMING FROM MY 15 YEAR OLD SISTER!!!!

 

 

I am planning on ignoring this message because it shows to me that they still have not changed. Worse, my parents are still using 3 way communication to speak to me (NEVER speak to me directly, but tell others to relay information).

 

I am so triggered and upset by any form of communication by my family.

 

I went back home and could not do any work because with the dilemma at work with a very difficult person, then comes this. The past few days have been horrible. I have such a massive headache. I don't know what to do.

 

Please advise.

 

 

Many thanks

[darkmoon]

then keep away from them all

 

i take it that your sister is/was treated better than you were

 

only you know what you can handle, or if your mother deserves your respect, if they are ganging up on you, having disparaging talks and discussing you as the villain and then sending the email, then stay away

 

it sounds like your sister is a poor mediator, given the way she wrote to you, trouble, being judgemental at you, will god forgive her?

 

i was abused by my mother, i know that this subject is taboo, you will not get many people able to see any mothers as bad ones, keep out of her firing line, it is sad that you have to, shrugs, just head onwards and upwards

Edited June 2, 2015 by darkmoon

[makeithappen]

then keep away from them all

 

i take it that your sister is/was treated better than you were

 

only you know what you can handle, or if your mother deserves your respect, if they are ganging up on you, having disparaging talks and discussing you as the villain and then sending the email, then stay away

 

it sounds like your sister is a poor mediator, given the way she wrote to you, trouble, being judgemental at you, will god forgive her?

 

i was abused by my mother, i know that this subject is taboo, you will not get many people able to see any mothers as bad ones, keep out of her firing line, it is sad that you have to, shrugs, just head onwards and upwards

 

 

Thank you for your reply! I will ignore this message but it's unbelievable that my younger sister who has nothing to do with anything and who is 10 years my junior is getting involved in these matters.

 

I am just so upset at the lack of respect and the tone of the message. The audacity to send me a rude email out of the blue on my uni account!

[Methodical]

Thank you for your reply! I will ignore this message but it's unbelievable that my younger sister who has nothing to do with anything and who is 10 years my junior is getting involved in these matters.

 

I am just so upset at the lack of respect and the tone of the message. The audacity to send me a rude email out of the blue on my uni account!

 

Whoa! Take a step back for just a second and look at the "whole" picture. I'm not saying 15 year olds aren't intelligent, but that's a chunk of information. You're upset bc of the content in the message, and I understand that. What your sister said was hurtful to you. BUT, being a decade wiser, surely you see that your parents are influencing (brainwashing) your younger sister who is at a very impressionable and vulnerable stage in her life. Your parents are manipulative and using a child to do their talking for them is repulsive.

 

Your younger sister is a pawn in all this. Your parents are using her to relay messages and in turn you are angry with her. I feel bad for her.

 

There's obviously some animosity between you and your parents for whatever reason. It seems unlikely you will ever see eye to eye with them and that's fine. Not all parents are good parents, and I won't go into all that here. Just keep in mind that your sister is being used and isn't of age nor does she have the capability to remove herself from the situation.

 

I hope you have a better day

[makeithappen]

Whoa! Take a step back for just a second and look at the "whole" picture. I'm not saying 15 year olds aren't intelligent, but that's a chunk of information. You're upset bc of the content in the message, and I understand that. What your sister said was hurtful to you. BUT, being a decade wiser, surely you see that your parents are influencing (brainwashing) your younger sister who is at a very impressionable and vulnerable stage in her life. Your parents are manipulative and using a child to do their talking for them is repulsive.

 

Your younger sister is a pawn in all this. Your parents are using her to relay messages and in turn you are angry with her. I feel bad for her.

 

There's obviously some animosity between you and your parents for whatever reason. It seems unlikely you will ever see eye to eye with them and that's fine. Not all parents are good parents, and I won't go into all that here. Just keep in mind that your sister is being used and isn't of age nor does she have the capability to remove herself from the situation.

 

I hope you have a better day

 

 

 

 

I understand your point. But a couple of months ago, my older brother who is in his late 20s sent me an equally aggressive text message.

 

It seems that age does not matter, in my family everyone thinks that I am spoilt girl who decided to leave a loving home!