HonchoToad Posted June 3, 2015 Share Posted June 3, 2015 I'm trying to Understand what steps would best benefit me in attempting a second chance at my ex of a little over a year who we still live together as room mates. The breakup was recent, about a week ago by her. Its been getting dragged out because none of us wanted to end it but problems due to my high anxiety and her side effects from her anti-depressant meds were making us clash. The first 8ish months of the relationship were great and smooth, but once she started taking the meds a ton of negative things began to happen "massive loss of energy, no labito, weight gain". She's battling these things that give her a negative self image as well as worrying that the loss of energy may be linked to diabetic symptoms. What she had said during the end of the breakup is she has no try left. she tried all she could and cant anymore and said that if we broke up we could never get back together again. I have some ideas on how to stabilize things out but im inexperienced on how to get us friendly again without being seen as just a friend. Sharing living space with her makes this a rather difficult challenge for me and am open to more experienced advice on the subject. Link to post Share on other sites
aloneinaz Posted June 3, 2015 Share Posted June 3, 2015 The big question here is, is the relationship salvageable? It sounds like you both have gotten thru the honeymoon stage and saw each other with your guards down. This is when the issues started to present themselves. Yes, her depression and reactions to her anti-depressants are a factor but.. If the relationship had a solid foundation, I don't think you both would of broken up. If you're having anxiety issues, a dysfunctional relationship isn't helping you. I think at a minimum you should find somewhere else to live and maybe take some time apart to see how you both feel. Your only other option is to ask her to sit down the next time you two are alone and talk through things and see if she's willing to try again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author HonchoToad Posted June 3, 2015 Author Share Posted June 3, 2015 The problem i believe is when things got rocky we were both too focused on staying together out of fear of breaking up due to the "cant get back together ever" thing, we tried to stay together and all attached when what we needed was time apart to fix our own issues. Moving out in the near future isnt a possibility right now unfortunately. What i plan on doing at the moment is keeping to myself and fixing what i believe caused her to lose confidence in me and give her time to cope with her problems so she is not volatile and on edge as she is right now. trying again once everything has settled down. I cant really use fully the no contact rule so I plan on just avoid conversation with her until i feel things have calmed down enough where I can try asking her about the relationship again. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts